The Let's Play Archive


by The Dark Id

Part 99: Episode XCVI: Citan Uzuki is a People Person

Episode XCVI: Citan Uzuki is a People Person

Following the escape from the Van Houten Estate, Fei manages to return to Arbot Plaza via the Solarian Bobsled Highway. I guess Elly’s house is both sewer dungeon and highway adjacent. Anyhow, now that we’re back in town, there is a bit of a problem...

Without Elhaym serving as our pantsless redhead Babel Fish, all Solarians now speak in a series of random punctuation. Or they’re all just shouting censored obscenities at Fei. Either way, we can no longer communicate with anyone around town.

Even the Security Not-Cubes just seem to yell at us before flying off. I guess they need to go update their language software before they can properly read Fei his rights. Solaris PD is stickler for protocol. In any case, let’s get back down to the 3rd Class Citizens’ block.

”Yes! I mean no! I mean...!%#?&+!”
“You're under arrest! Get in that door!!

Fei is escorted into the security scanner room...Music: Invasion

“As I suspected. You know nothing...!”

The Solarian Trooper undergoes a magic girl transformation and becomes...Citan Uzuki!

"I saw Bart's image on the Birdvision in the dedication."
"You saw that too, doc?"
"Yes. But I did not see either of you. Soon after, I heard there was an intruder at the 2nd floor of the Arebato Grounds. I suspected it was probably you so I waited here. After that, I did not hear anything about the capture of any intruders."
"How did you know I was going to be here?"
*ponders* "The best possible way to sneak into the Palace is through the dust chute. And to get back to the 3rd floor, one must pass through this observation tower. I have always been thinking... Do you think you could possibly be a little more subtle? When infiltrating enemy ground, the most basic thing to do is to be stealthy. With the amount of activity you have stirred up, you could even wake up the dead."
*looks down* "Well, I was actually trying to be subtle..."
”Turns out I just kinda suck at it...”
"By the way, what happened to Elly? Was she not with you?"
"Elly... She went back home. She really shouldn't have any relation with us land dwellers. She already has such wonderful parents..."
”Well, other than her dad sleeping around with maids and pulling guns on people and slapping around his daughter when she gets out of line. But beyond that, wonderful!”
"I see... Yes. It may have been better for her that way. Let us head for the dust chute then."
”That was way too much enthusiasm for jumping down a place people toss trash, wasn’t it?”
“Just a bit.”

"Now Fei, stay very close to me. That way it does not pick up on your presence."

Citan piggyback rides on Fei as they cross the scanner unharmed. While the alarm doesn’t sound, Fei’s bullshit detector pings slightly.

“According to Elly, only 1st Class citizens and military personnel can pass through...?"
*looks startled and makes a few flustered gestures* "Uh!? Well... that is... P, probably they have not deleted my ID from the days I was in the military and it is still stored in the data bank. My, how the Solaris monitors are sloppy... Hahaha...”
”I...guess that works... I mean, they haven’t updated Elly’s ID yet and I’m pretty sure she’s on all of Gebler’s shit list.”

Good old gullible Fei. I wonder if he’ll question how Citan knows the security flaw for infiltrating the palace that was only accessible from a top military brass’ personal computer.  Naw! 

The game makes us run through that stealth segment again before returning to F Block. But thankfully, the security drones are on a union mandated lunch break so we can run right through. Anyhow, the dust chute is right next to Samson’s now vacant apartment block. I still think having a Timothy clone, lampshading his questionable palette swap existence, and then immediately killing him off is one of the weirder minor events this game pulls. Anyway, down the hole we go!

Mario pipe sound...

Citan and Fei end up in a shithole. Well, we’ve had like three areas involving sewers now. Might as well go the whole nine yards and have a trash dump area too. Unfortunately, we cannot just waltz into the big hole in the middle there. We need to activate the...whatever it is...somehow. But, that panel off to the right looks promising.

*fiddles with the panel*
>>>>Card needed to activate the Vac-Sys... Please insert card.
*ponder stance* "......No go. What shall we do...?"
"What shall we do?? Didn't you have a plan?"
*shakes head* "No, I am afraid not... I assumed we would just figure something out."
”I should be kind of pissed at you for not having a plan.’re right. Things do usually just kinda randomly work out. This is wei—“
”Ah. There we go! I was starting to get worried.”

Elly plops down the garbage chute. Citan and Fei see everything. They see it all...

"Elly!? What're you doing here?"
"Well... after that, when I was crying, my mother came to me and said... 'go with them'..."
”Oh. Good thing your mom is a bit cooler than your d—“
“Hush. I’m going to explain it in a flashback.”

FLASHBACK! to Elly sulking in her room staring at a crayon drawn picture of...herself?Music: The Treasure Which Cannot Be Stolen

"Elly, I think you should live your life the way you wish. If your loved ones are in a crisis, you can't desert them..."
"Mother... I'm sorry, for what I said earlier..."
"...I know. But there's no doubt that you're my child... No matter what happens, you're my sweetheart..."

Elly gets up and hugs her mom...

"Now... You'd better hurry..."
"Yes... Take care mom..."

Elly walks out into the hall. This flashback is playable for some reason, even though walking form Medena out into the hall is the only input the player has...

*Received Army Cardkey.*
"To be human is to be able to pick your own path in life..."
”Sorry I almost shot your boyfriend and forbid you from following your path. It was a long day at work and I overreacted. You know I’m not regular until I have an after-work coffee and afternoon mustache trim.”
*turns toward the door* "It looks like the military police are here..."

Elly and Erich go downstairs to greet the group of stormtroopers...

*walks up to Elly*
"What are you doing? The intruder fled. My daughter has nothing to do with this!"
“I can't, Lord Erich. Turn your daughter over to us. Lord Krelian's orders.”
"Lord Krelian? What does he want with my daughter... What? You mean... Gazel's...!"
“You do not need to know. Take her!”

Erich pulls his gun again and starts waving it around. I get the feeling this is a common occurrence with Father Van Houten...

“W, what!? Lord Erich! Have you lost your mind?”
"I'm perfectly fine! Leave her alone!"
“Lord Krelian's orders are the Emperor's orders. You realize what'll happen to your rank if you disobey this order? You'll be demoted to 3rd Class citizen!”
"I know. But even if it's Lord Krelian's order I will not allow my daughter to be Gazel's test subject. Elly, go! I'll take care of this!"
*shakes head* "But..."
"Don't worry about me. Go help Fei."
”Wait...Fei... Haven’t I heard that na—“
“Fei...vel. Go help Feivel!”


And with that, Elly runs off to go help her friends at the cost of her family getting bumped back to the slave labor caste. Welp!

Back in the present...

"Father, mother..."
"...The 'Ministry'......"
"'Ministry'!? Father said that too!! What is the 'Ministry'?"
”...Nobody said ‘Ministry’ during that flashback.”
"...You will find out."
”Way to dodge the question.”
“Didn’t you say the Gazebo Ministry was like some old dead guys that hung out with Skull Emperor?”
“Oh...that Ministry? Duh.”

*enters fighting stance* "Let's go back! We gotta save him!"
"We can't! If you go now, they'll catch you too. My parents will be fine. Their military record should protect them. ...If necessary I'll turn myself in after everyone is rescued and that will settle it."
"Let's go. Something might happen to them while we're just talking here."
"I am worried for Elly's family, but... Her father risked his life to get us this card. We must go on!"
"But in this filthy place? Spare me. What I would not give for my old bathtub now! Do you not agree, Fei?"
*realize they’re already covered in filth again*

Anyhow, with Erich’s military ID card we can now access the Imperial garbage chute. Yeah, I don’t know how that works either.

Roughly half a second after activation, everything in the room gets violently sucked down the central hole...

Music: Invasion

And slammed into the following room. Except for Citan. He’s a skilled garbology professor and can keep his footing.

What follow is a few rather uneventful rooms filled with ladder climbing and simple platforming.

There’s also one of those puzzles where there’s a spinning fan blade and you need to wedge a piece of rubble into it in order to stop the fan blades (50/50 chance of the fan exploding shortly thereafter.) I’ve seen that obstacle in probably a hundred video games. I wonder which one did it first.

A few corridors later and we find what appears to be a food storage area. Fei is, unsurprisingly, hungry from the sight of food.

At the far end of the room, the party comes across several more containers of food...

”I was looking forward to that meal your mom was gonna make us.”
“Weren’t you the one that wanted to hurry off after Bart and the others?”
“Elly, there is ALWAYS time for a meal.”

"Let's have a bite here."
"You're right... We don't know what'll happen, so we shouldn't ask too much."
"What about you, doc?"
*shakes head slowly* "No, I am fine, thank you."
"Are you sure? Then, excuse us..."
"Let's eat."

Fei and Elly crack open a tin and start chowing down on the Vienna sausages or whatever is within. Citan just watches in knowing silence...

*belch* “Good stuff. Solaris has some pretty decent canned junk.”
"Well then, let's go!"

Fei and the gang head into the next area...Music: Jaws of Ice

"I see... The medicine we normally use is made here too..."

The only way to progress here is via the conveyor belts since...well, it has already been established that Solaris isn’t the best at general architecture. However...

Walking through the scanner on the conveyor belt will dump us out. Citan suggests we find a way to deactivate said foreign object scanner.

Luckily, there’s a fully operation and completely unmanned control station nearby for us to fiddle with recklessly.

We have to input some manner of code to deactivate the scanner. Hitting the digits will light up or turn off the blocks on the monitor. Though some blocks can only have an additional block added’s quite confusing, to be honest. We are given no indication as to the correct code. It’s entirely trial and error. Or looking the answer up on GameFAQs.

Anyhow, this is the correct sequence to progress. Now here’s the weird thing...

Past the southern conveyor belt’s scanner is a side room that tells us the correct code to turn off the lock. It also tells us two additional passwords to nab a couple of treasures (Gold Nugget and Bullion respectively.) It also provides a tutorial on how to use the code input machine. I think someone fucked up on the level design here...

The trio progress further into the complex...

"Yuck... I don't want to see where they make it."
”Hotdogs are tasty, alright? I don’t wanna see that they’re made from all the gross parts of animals mashed up. I just want them to be on a bun and yummy! Is that so much to ask?! Ugh.”

Fei moves toward the door to the next room...

"You ate that food. Consider that fact when you open that door."
"What about that canned food?"
"What is it...? What's supposed to be... there, exactly?"
”Ugh. It’s gonna be like cow tongues and pig noses and stuff. Gross. I told you I didn’t wanna know.”
"See for yourselves."

The party enters the next part of the factory...

"No... You must be kidding..."

Dear God... Soylent Green is...


Elly immediately projectile vomits for the rest of the scene.


Fei proceeds to blow chunks SO HARD that it causes him to have an extremely brief flashback.

“The organism experiment lab and its disposal facility in Solaris. And the production facility for food and medicine to maintain the Limiter seal. Aquvy's Wels Reapers were also made here. Elly, do you remember Dominia's words during our infiltration of Shevat?”
*vomits some more*
“Here is the answer. People of her native country served as one of the origins for Wels...the M plan. They were used that way because of their peculiar abilities. She is the last survivor. Elly, your father, Erich, used to be the superintendent of this facility. He was involved in the research with Maria's father."

Elly stands up and looks annoyed...

“My father'd never take part in such a thing!"
*shakes head* "Naturally, Erich always had pangs of guilt. So he kept as many land dwellers as possible under his protection as 3rd Class citizens. Then he resigned. That's why he is on the administrative staff of the Special Forces now."
*folds arms* "My father... did that... No, it can't be true..."
"Now, get up, Fei. Get up and look it over..."
”Ugh... Doc... When my stomach doesn’t feel like it wants to burst out of my chest and jump off the edge of Solaris... I’m finding Bart... And ugh... we’re both kicking the shit out of you...”
*stands up* "Could... this be... true...? Doc..."
"...This is reality. Let's go."

Fei and Elly wander out of the room. Citan Uzuki, fuckheads supreme, stays behind to ponder briefly...

“Is that, permissible...?"

Citan Uzuki Concept Art – The many faces of a total asshole.