Part 32

Looks like it's that time again.
Well, the last upgrade was definitely worth it. Might as well grab this one too.
Right. What was the last offer, about 25,000? I say we double that.



...
Double it? Are you sure?
Not like we can't afford it, right? Besides, we've gotta be sure we keep our edge. It's as much about staying ahead of everyone else as it is having a bigger ship.
You mean it's as much about your ego.
Well, yeah. That's a given.





50,000.
Right.
How are we doing this anyway? Taking it in turns?
Jeezus.
What?
Look, boy. I know you think yer all grown up, playin' with your toy money. Maybe after Mr. Fancypants called you to that meeting, humoured you, you thought you had somethin' to contribute.
But Vandergriff Ltd. ain't never needed no help from nobody. So you just get back to playin' and leave this to the real men.
...
Did you hear what I just said?
I'm trying to parse what you just said.
What?
You haven't not ever needed no help from nobody? Bloody hell.
...
Son, you remind me of my little brother, god rest his soul. He was a little slow in the head too.






Do you...do you wanna go fishing or somethin'?
Um.
Okay.







God damn it.



God damn it. There go our chances of selling anything next week.
Calm down. There's bound to be something left.



Okay. You were right. There is, in fact, something left.
...there might be somewhere we could sell those toasters.
Dude, at most we'd make about 200 kubars. Minus taxes, we wouldn't break even.
Alright, but it's not a big problem. We just came to the wrong place at the wrong time. At least we made something off the passengers.
Yeah.
Yeah, I guess so. We'll make up for it next week. Soon as we get our new ship.



What.
The.
FUCK.
One kubar?
This is fucking full-blown shenanigans, right here.
It...it must have been a lucky guess. People probably bid 50,000 all the time on these things.
No way. Someone had their fingers in this pie. Hell, ten to one someone had their fingers in the guy who ran the auction.
...that would be Emperor Dred.
Well then someone had their fingers in Emperor Dred. This shit happens, dude. Especially with royalty. Power and floozies corrupt.
I'm not saying you're wrong. I'm just saying, you know. Gross?
...okay, yeah.





Ah, sirs? There is a gentleman on the ship who wishes to propose a transaction, sirs.
In the middle of a flight? How'd he get on board?
No sir, not on board the ship. ON the ship.
On...?
You may wish to take a look outside, sir.
Why, what's...holy shit!



What is that thing?! What is it?!
There is no cause for alarm, sirs. This creature is known as a "fuel fiend", sirs.
A fuel fiend?
Yes, sir. They require large quantities of hydrocarbons in their system in order to breed, such as can be found in fuel oil, sir. Therefore, they will often latch on to large vessels such as ours and request an, ah, "aperitif", sir. It's quite a common occurrence, sir.
Ewww.
What's wrong?
Why would anyone or anything need to chug a tank of oil before getting it on?
Well sir, it-
I DON'T ACTUALLY WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWER GOD DAMN
Very good, sir.
So how does this work, then? Either we let it suck out our fuel or we get eaten?
Oh no, nothing so barbaric, sir. Despite their fearsome appearance, they are quite civilised, sir. I believe this one is offering a monetary gift in exchange, sir. 96,000 kubars in exchange for half the fuel in our tank, sir.
Whoa. That's not bad.
Will we still have enough fuel to make the trip, though?
I believe so, sir.
Hmm. Well...