Part 763: Let's Read: Main Event - Part 5
Let’s Read: Main Event (part 5)Chapter 5
Tara, Northwind
27 April 3054
Days elapsed since book start: 4
Things accomplished since book start: 0
Protagonists introduced since book start: 3
Antagonists introduced since book start: 0
Anyway, this chapter gets off with an eeeeugh when Jeremiah introduces his sister’s Phoenix Hawk as the love of her life; then promptly jumps to Jeremiah being somewhat irritated that his sister and his girlfriend have connected INSTANTLY in what I can only surmise is the author’s inability to understand how people and/or relationships actually work.
Main Event posted:
Rose had taken his sister to the hospital to meet Rachel McCloud. Though he and Rianna arrived too near the end of visiting hours for a prolongued visit, the women began almost instantly to chatter together like long-lost friends.
BULLSHIT!
Ok, we’re not even past the first paragraph and I already want to hang myself.
1) Chauvanism
2) he took his sister to meet the woman he’s been fucking for three months but doesn’t know well enough to know whether she drinks alcohol or not
3) AAAAAAAARGH!
Anyway, Jeremiah then interrupts GIRL TALK TIME so he can talk to Rachel McCloud about his BRILLIANT MASTER PLAN.
Main Event posted:
The two women regarded him in silence.
[…]
“Rianna is going to be the nucleus of the new unit I’ve been wating to form. Now that I know I won’t be able tog ather the strength I need for an effective mercenary unit here on Northwind, I think my best bet is Outreach.”
So, Jeremiah plans to go to Outreach, the planet Mercenaries gravitate to because Wolf’s Dragoons has set it up as a neutral place where anyone can hire Mercenaries, and recruit some mercenaries there? WHAT AN AMAZING PLAN!
… Except no, he’s not going to be doing that. Jeremiah Rose is a rebel, he’s going to Solaris VII—the ‘Game World’—so he can kill some people in arenas and grind out a few more levels in being a colossal dickhead.
Jeremiah intends to buy a ‘Mech on Solaris, which is an interesting choice. Any bets what he ultimately winds up piloting? (Here’s a hint: it’s a Charger). Jeremiah then reveals that his plan revolves around recruiting his cousin Argus (even though they haven’t spoken yet and
)He then tells McCloud that he’d like to hire her to carry Rianna and Angus to Outreach, and that he’s going to pay “standard rates” and thinks it’s a fair deal. Now, McCloud captains a Union-class ship, the Bristol, which can carry up to 12 battlemechs. Rose thinks it’s “fair” to pay her for the transport of 2, as expects her to stick around for three to six months not making any money so she can transport Rose and Pals to their first assignment.
Main Event posted:
“Obviously it will mean more to us than to you, but I think it’s a good business proposition.”
McCloud looked up at him. “What do you know about business?”
C’mon, McCloud, let’s be fair. What does Jeremiah Rose know about anything?
Rachel makes a decision not to make a decision until she’s checked around for less insane cargo to haul, but does agree to carry Rianna and Angus (what’re the chances he won’t sign on now that Rose has decided to talk about him like he’s already a member?) to Outreach.
Anyway, McCloud then wastes about six paragraphs bitching about how “the bank” owns almost half her ship. Rachel admonishes Jeremiah that he has to be a good accountant to be a good Mercenary. Not understanding what that means, Jeremiah just kinda wanders off at this point.
McCloud then tells
We then cut back to Rose and Rianna, and Rianna proves to everyone that her IQ is indeed seventeen points higher than Jeremiah’s.
Main Event posted:
“Are you two… involved?”
Rose looked at his sister, then caught a nasty look from the station nurse, whom he had never met. Returning his gaze to Ria, he wondered if it was amusement he heard in her voice. He saw no trace of it on her face.
“Yes. No. Yes, but it’s not serious. Hell, I don’t know. It’s just that I trusted her and this would have worked out so well for the unit.”
None of that was an answer, you jackass!
Anyway, talking about his unit immediately distracts Rianna who wants to come up with a name. Jeremiah hadn’t put any thought into it, and just wanted to be the Black Watch (which would’ve got him tagged with a lawsuit and/or cease-and-desist order the moment he touched down on Outreach).
Rianna suggests such gems as “Rose’s Roughnecks” (FUCK YOU, JIM LONG) and then points out that the
name should be the Black Thorns; because it’s catchy and Jeremiah ROSE. It’s also an unintentional reference to Jeremiah’s penis, and I am amused by the implication that it is tiny.Main Event posted:
Rianna: “It’s a great name.”
“It’s a name, all right. Great, I don’t know about.”
“Just think about it.”
Jeremiah nodded without enthusiasm.
The two then decide to talk to Angus (off-screen, mercifully (he joins the unit)). We then learn that Jeremiah Rose has been using a hotel as an extremely expensive safe deposit box since he hasn’t
Main Event posted:
“This is really happening, isn’t it?”
“It really is, and Papa’s going to be furious.”
“Let him.” Ria’s voice grew hard. “It’s my choice and I want this too bad to bow to his selfish desires.”
Pot. Kettle.
Anyway, Jeremiah has already decided to call his unit the Black Thorns and heads back to the hotel to
Then the chapter ends.