Part 190: Television Personalities

Hey, welcome back to hell, everyone! My brain turned to pudding over the holidays, but I think I'm finally ready to start putting this LP out of its misery.



We'll leave that talent whatsit for later and start with the customary dating sim mode. Looks fishy to me.



KAEDE: Hey, Shuichi!



...That's me. Kaede is calling my name... Ah...where am I...? What am I doing here?



SHUICHI: When suddenly, I...I was pushed into a car... Before I even figured out what was happening, I lost consciousness. ...That's right, this is the Ultimate Academy, and we... We are...the 16 high school students with Ultimate talents. And then... The Monokubs... They ordered us to investigate the grounds.







Kaede, look at the monitor!



...

Kept you bastards waiting, huh!?

Everyone, make your way to the gym please.

The opening ceremony can finally begin!

Phew! We finally finished our preparations!

...You do realize you just read your lines backwards, don't you?







Kaede...what should we do?

What should we do? Go, of course. Everyone else is probably doing the same thing.

True, but...I'm a little worried about this...



This is a pretty relaxing change in text box design, I've gotta say.

Despite my trepidation, we headed toward the gym.



It reminded me of an engine sound from a giant robot anime. And right at that moment...



From here, things proceed as they did in Chapter 1, Part 6, until we get to this point:



...What?

M-M-Monodam! How DARE you upstage me!

W—Wait a second. What did you say?

I-If I heard him correctly—



Huh?

???: My cute little cubs... I'm canceling this killing game...

Oh! That voice!

Skipping ahead again...



The narration is slightly different now that Shuichi's doing it.



What exactly does that mean?

Oh, you don't need to worry about that. I've decided to cancel the killing game.

C-Cancel!?







...

I don't like violence or gore, so I don't really mind if it's cancelled...





Nope, your father has never had a single glit—

...glit-glit-glit—

...glit-glit-glit—





You're like a kid covered in frosting who swears he didn't touch that cake!

Classic Pops! His pride is higher than the Eiffel Tower!



And I've never glitched! I'm a professional, dammit!



There's no way you'd just let us go after all this.

Puhu...puhuhuhuhu...

What is so amusing?

It's just...when I said it again, I kinda just phoned it in and now I feel awkward...



In this mode...

I just want you to have a fun time living at the academy.

...Huh?

Mode...?



Anyway, as long as you guys have a fun life at the academy, that's alright by me.

You're at that special age where it doesn't take much to get your hormones raging.

Umm, I don't get the point.



There's always one show like that on the air at any given time, y'know?

Like, a buncha guys and gals livin' under one roof, gettin' the bots for each other... The audience just eats it up, watchin' to see who's gonna end up with who.

That's what I want for you guys. I want you to star in your own reality dating show.



Yep, that kinda stock reaction is to be expected...

But if you've looked around the academy, then you already know, don't you? The academy is surrounded by a huge wall. You can't escape to the outside world...

And as long as we have the Exisals, you can't defy us.





Quit shouting. This is way more mild than what I originally had planned for you. Plus, I'm not saying you gotta live here forever.



Weren't you listening? I said this is a reality dating show. And just like those shows promise, the couple who ends up together get to graduate.

But, uh, try to be quick about it, okay? Audiences get bored fast these days. If no one ends up together after ten days, this show will be forced off the air.



Maybe that's when he'll make us do the killing game?

Nyah-hahahaha! Kids these days... Always worrying about the future as if failure is a guarantee.

Aheheh. Yeah. Can't imagine why that's hip with the kids these days.

Take chances, get messy, make mistakes! Worry about failure when it happens.



Papa Kuma is on the pulse of society's trends!

Pops is such a great capitalist! There's no idea he won't rip off to make a profit!

...



But the romantic sparks won't fly if you guys just do whatever you want. The audience won't know who to watch if all sixteen of you are just milling about.



Telling us to fall in love or whatever? What do you want us to do!?



When you wanna "spend time" with another student... Or in other words, when you wanna "go on a date," please exchange a Date Ticket. What's that? How do you go about obtaining one of these tickets?



Wanting something gives it value—in other words, you gotta shell out cash for 'em.

You guys have already seen a place on campus where you can earn cash, haven't you?

...Earn cash?



...SPOILER-WARNING.

...Oops!

Uh-oh... Monophanie's gonna get punished by Pops—



Nrghhhhhh! I feel so bad! This is all my fault!

] No, it's democracy's fault!



Ah-hahahahaha!



...



Everything here is maniacal and twisted...

Especially Tsumugi's face.

A school surrounded by a giant wall... Sixteen imprisoned Ultimates... These bizarre stuffed animals armed to the teeth... And on top of all that...some kind of reality dating show... Without even a moment of respite, we became the cast of this twisted story.



...Yesterday wasn't a dream. It's real. It's all horribly real. ......... There's no sense worrying about it. I should get my mind off it. Just focus on what I can do... I made up my mind about it and forced myself to get out of bed. Alright, how should I spend my day today?



Check out the minimap. We're confined to this part of the courtyard, where everyone's gathered in a convenient place.



I notice something while checking out the backyard.

Hell yeah! Byeow-nyeow-nyeow! My pain's a tattoo that's been etched on me for liiiiiiife! Byeow-nyeow-nyeow! If I say I regret it, that would be such a liiiiiiiie!

I got 4 casino coins flung at me.

Monokid doesn't understand how busking works. He leaves after that little performance.



DID-YOU-KNOW, DETECTIVE? FATHER-ONLY-EATS-SALMON.

He discreetly handed me 12 casino coins and left the way I came...



You're a weirdo for coming to this place. Can't you see there's nothing here?

Hm? Then what am I doing here? Some questions in life are best left unanswered...

100 casino coins were handed to me, laced with implication.

I couldn't find the other two, unless they're hanging out on different days which I don't feel like checking.



Let's ask our beloved headmaster for guidance.

Huh? What do you want now?



After all, the most important person you can love is yourself. How's anyone supposed to fall in love with you if you don't love yourself...?

Huh? You wanna hear something with a little more substance? Hmm... This feels like a rule violation, but... in your case, I'll make an exception.



The honeymoon phase only lasts so long before you gotta step up your love game.

For a person like that, get a Date Ticket from the casino and take them out on a date. A change of scenery will let them see you in anew light. Maybe even fall in love with you.

But remember, you can't invite someone on a date unless your affection is half full.



It won't cost you a ticket and it won't take too long, so it's not a waste of your time.

Anyway, do your best, Romeo! I'll be watching along with the audience!



Alright! Let's take a look at your affection level, Shuichi!



I've got my work cut out for me. Here's where you can get the free time events you missed if you're a normal person who's not doing a comprehensive LP. Next time, we start cleaning up those last ten friendship fragments.

Danganronpa 53
Danganronpa V3 theme.













In case you felt like bringing the main menu with you while you play the game.