Part 19

Now I feel cheated that Sheila's not a party member.

Chapter 17



Not Mount Hobs! She might get inconvenienced by Goblins!



Anyway, we pay our respects to the Wind Crystal and go out to bust our deliquent daughter out of jail.



It's just a short stroll to the west to Mount Hobs.




Yang outclasses these fools. Granted, these two chumps only get one fang to Yang's two.

Each of their fangs are elemental. Yang has Fire/Lightning, and I think the other two are Ass/Fire and Butt/Ice. Anyway, these come in handy in the next stage when we're fighting undead.





Ah, Mount Hobs. The mountain pass that separates Fabul and Damcyan.



At this point, I'm not even going to bother showing off all the enemies. You've seen them all before, and the game reuses the same enemy types in every single chapter.

That's Yang hitting an elemental weakness. Fire Claws are awesome.



(Has she grown strong enough to make it this far on her own? Or has something worse happened instead?)

Relax, Yang. It's only been two screens. We haven't even reached the part where the party watched you instantly destroy two enemies, effortlessly defeat three more in a battle, and then joined you in fighting Mom Bomb.

Please, please don't let this be the exact scenario Ursula is in.



OH COME ON





Yah!



Yes, this entire scene plays out exactly like in the original.

Ursula!
Princess!

Except Yang keeps shouting at his daughter, who's too busy beating the crap out of monsters to pay attention.



Pretty sure you're not considered a citizen of Fabul unless you know how to kick your enemies.



Stay out of this, Father!
This won't be as easy as before, Ursula!



Yang's wrong. This battle is an even bigger joke this game.

Meet Ursula. She's got better offensive than the rear end monks, but she's kind of gimped this battle just from virtue of being in the back row.

As for Chakra?




It heals a solid amount and cures some status effects. It's pretty freaking awesome and makes an already pathetic battle into even a bigger joke.





As you can imagine, combining Cover Counter with Chakra can make all physical battles a huge joke.





Anyway, you know how the rest of this battle plays out. Nothing has changed. At all. They copied the exact freaking event from FF4, only changing characters and the starting position of the party.

This is the most shameless sequel I've ever seen.





Alright, we murdered a mother and her children. Again. Time to go home before Sheila threatens domestic abuse with cookware.



But not before Yang berates his daughter in front of his subordinates!

Father!?
Not only did you disobey my express instructions...

...Express instructions?

...you blundered deep into the wilderness by yourself! What were you thinking?

Blundered?

Aw shit, now I'm doing it.



You had to have some reason.
The shooting star.
The what?
I saw a shooting star fall near Mount Hobs several days ago.



Oh come on, Yang. Fucking NPCs talk about it in town. Why are you making a big deal about your daughter not telling you she saw some shooting star or whatever? How did you not know about this?



...

Ursula's response is perfect.

You are right.



I love the banter between Yang and Ursula. Two stubborn people who actually have an ounce of personality just yelling at each other. That's always fun to watch.

Please let me go along! I promise I won't do anything rash.



Again, while the dialogue is kind of sketchy in some places in this chapter, a lot of these lines just do it for me. Yang's not wasting any words here.



I also love how persistent and clever Ursula is. She's a fighter, but she knows how to manipulate a conversation and get what she wants.



I'd go as far as to say that the Yang/Ursula relationship is possibly the best one in the game.

We will gladly protect the princess for you, Master Yang.

Even the monks know she won this one. Though I'd like to think of it more as Ursula protecting these mooks. Oh, I'm sorry, monks.



Absolutely.



So Ursula joins up. The bad news is we have to investigate that shooting star, so we're going to be late for dinner. Sheila's going to be pissed.



A description of Ursula's abilities. Chakra is awesome.



This path is a dick move, as they're both very long, one leading to decent but not fantastic treasure. Right is the exit, but you see a treasure chest when taking it and may think you've moving toward it until you see the whole path. It's expertly designed to waste your time and force you to endure the game's high encounter late.

It's a move that fits right in with TAY's M.O.



Anyway, we get a new outfit for Ursula, so she gets to dress like Daddy now.



I ended up switching Ursula with Butt, as Butt hits worse than a girl. Ursula can easily outdamage these two idiots, and it's not really like I need to spam Chakra every round.



At the end of Mount Hobs, Namingway offers to sell us stuff. Which is nice, but then, what the hell am I going to do with Potions when I have Chakra?



Sweet, a Power Armlet. Now Ursula can punch like Daddy!



Next time, we investigate a crash site and punch some aliens in the face.

 There may or may not be actual aliens here. OK, there actually aren't any aliens. Plenty of monsters we've seen before, though, so I hope you like punching the same things over and over!