Final Fantasy Legend Part #23 - Of Mice and Adventurers

Part 23: Of Mice and Adventurers

Chapter 17: Of Mice and Adventurers

Blaaaaaaah

Actually, I believe we're in for a pleasant surprise!

Woot! It's about time we caught a break!

Up up up, up up up, goes the spire of the steeple~

Elly.

Yeah. I've been thinking about Gen-Bu, too.

Not just that. You couldn't tell because you don't have the extra senses I do. He was undead. Someone has resurrected the fiends unnaturally.

Then someone's got a lot of explaining to do when we get to the top of this thing.

Just when you think that you have enough, enough groooows~

That's the thing about fire escapes. There's never any good scenery.

Trog is not fan of moving stairs! Make men soft and weak!

You're welcome to climb up the side of the tower if you like.

OK! Prepare jump!

No don't

Ha! Ha! Is joke.

The final climb up the tower isn't terribly exciting. You repeat the same floor pattern about 3-4 times per world using automatic stairs to zip up to the top. The background does change as you pass through each "world," though, going from Seaside to Cloud World to Future World. It's a nice little touch.

I don't think I'm spoiling anything when I say Gen-Bu won't be the first familiar face. In fact...

I mean, I don't want to come off as racist. I'm just really, really bad at biology.

And?

So, like... How does that... work? Amoebaea being pregnant and all.

...

I mean, do slimes have lady bits? Is that how that happens? Help me out here, I have no idea what's going on.

Well, it's an awkward question, but at least it's earnest. Slimes have many genders. Some reproduce sexually, some asexually. My spouse is asexual, in fact.

Oh! So that's why you never say "my husband" or "my wife."

My husband?

It's a brave new world, Dente. I try not to assume.

Good for you.

Welp. Wish I could say I was surprised.

...

_{I just wanted to help. Wanted to help.}

More freaky-deaky babbling. Did these guys fall on their heads or something?

Who did this to you?

Elly?

Who did this?! Tell me!

_{Said he'd get me a place at the table. Said I could change things. Just wanted to help.}

What's wrong with him? Is he sick?

Yes, I'm afraid so. Please, Rezen. End his suffering. It's the humane thing to do.

...alright.

Was not much fun killing fiend this time.

Yeah.

Yay woo. Treasure.

Rezen?

Meh.

Something has gone terribly, terribly wrong with our quest.

Byak-Ko'll be up next.

Keep your power dry on this one, guys. I'm going to try to get through to him. We have to figure out what the hell is going on.

...

Byak-Ko! Please, tell us who did this to you. We'll do everything we can to help. You have our word!

Help? Help?! Your "help" is why I'm like this now! Your word means nothing!

I'll kill you! I'll kill all of you!

No, please! Just listen!

Elly, he is trying to murder you!

It's us or him!

Version 2.0 of the Fiends have a pretty hefty amount of HP. Previously, we took them down in two or three rounds. Here, I'm pretty sure we have to shell out 2000+ damage just to kill one. Don't get me wrong, our guys can do it, but it's a pretty steep jump.

The part about them being undead is true, which means fighting them with the Sun Sword is absolutely hilarious. You won't see it here because of the gimmicked loadouts, but if we bought a Sun Sword back at Base Town and handed it to Trog, he would probably crit his way through every single fiend.

*roar*

Wish I knew he had a weakness against glass ahead of time. I would've saved our empty elixir bottles.

And you laugh! You laugh at the chaos left in your wake! Laugh at the worlds reduced to ash!

I'm not the monster! You're the monsters!

...

Vocare ad regnum!

_{Not the monster. You're the monsters. You.}

...

Elly, he's wrong! We didn't do any of this!

Friend Rezen right. Many more die if not acting. Did best we could at cost. Is not perfect, but better now.

Yeah. Somebody had to make the hard calls, right?

...

Let's go. We've got about 10 more flights of stairs to climb.

Very well.

Wait, who are you?

...Dente?

*poke* *poke* Where'd you get that suit of armor?

Ah. Rezen? That's my exoskeleton you're prodding.

Oh! My bad.

That item, as far as I can tell, is the ____ shoe. I don't know what's going on here, but Trog gets it. The end.

Also, Byak-Ko 2 leaves behind meat! This is the last meat we'll see, and it transforms Dente into a Mazin. The Mazin, appropriately enough, is amazing! It gets Sword (meh), Bash (!!), Flame (

), Beam (

), and Warning (

). It also has massive stats across the board and 700 HP. But the best part are its immunities: O-Change and O-Damage. O-Damage. Dente's exoskeleton armor is apparently powered by the light of Earth's yellow sun.

With the final meat of the game devoured, I've completed Dente's challenge and ended up with a top tier monster. Hooray! For the record, here's the list of final monsters by type.

Susano-O (Goblin)
Lich (Skeleton)
Phoenix (Bird)
Ganesha (Rhino)
Hi-Slime (Slime)
Revnant (Zombie)
Basilisk (Lizard)
Anubis (Werecreature)
Fenswolf (Animal)
Scarab (Clipper)
Mantis (Fly)
Ghost (Ghost)
Athalot (Imp)
Gigaworm (Worm)
Jorgandr (Snake)
Nike (Raven)
Leviathn (Fish)
Beholder (Eye)
Kraken (Squid)
Dagon (Crab)
Darkrose (Plant)
Ki-Rin (Griffin)
Mazin (Golemn)
Lilith (Medusa)
Tiamat (Dragon)

Besides the various gods and goddesses showing up on that list (hi, Nike!), you'll notice traditional FF summons, as well as the original Final Fantasy's Elemental Fiends: Lich, Lilith, Kraken, and Tiamat. It's a nifty little callback.

...

Elly.

...

Elly, you know who's next.

I know, Dente. I know.

_{Well now. There's a face I didn't expect. What brings you this far up off the ground, mice?}

Knock it off. You know why we're here.

_{Do I, now?}

Yeah. We're here to kill you.

*clatter*

And I'm not gonna do it.

Elly! Have you lost your mind?!

...

_{Hmm hmm hmm. So, this is how you get your revenge. Impressive.}

You want off this mortal coil, you tell me what the hell is happening. Why are you back from the dead? Why did Ryu-O call Ashura an illusion? Where does this tower really go?

_{So many questions, Elly. Such an inquisitive little rodent.}

Talk!

_{Very well...}

quote:

*burp*

Ugh! You're disgusting, Gen!

Bwahahaha!

Is it possible for you two to show even the slightest hint of maturity?

Sorry, Sue.

Thank you. Now, where has Bjorn gotten off to?

Last I saw, he was headed to the weapons shop.

Again? I thought he already spent his share of the gold.

He... He took mine.

What?

Ryu, you gotta start standing up for yourself. Don't let that big jerk push you around.

I'm too little to do anything about it, Gen. One day, though, I'll be strong. I won't take orders from anybody!

Ha! This is a pretty good sword. It'll serve me well.

What is it this time?

I'll deal with you later.

...

_{Oh, but it gets better.}

quote:

You see? No tricks. No traps. This is your chance to undo all the misery you've seen. I can make all of that happen.

...

Sounds like a pretty good deal to me!

Yeah. Beats goin' home empty handed.

And what do you get out of it?

Eh?

Do you think me stupid? A deal requires gains on both sides.

Quite perceptive. In order to lend you my power and resources, you'll have to operate under the banner of Ashura Labs.

What?

I assure you, it's not as bad as it sounds. The weapons you've seen were meant to be used against the old fiends. They rebelled against my wishes, enslaving and murdering instead of guiding and ruling. I couldn't just stand by and let it happen!

...

Please, you have to believe me. Don't let promises of Paradise blind you. This is the last chance we have to save the world. I'll destroy my weapons, and you can fix the damage that was done. We can make it right. Together.

Very well. But you had best not be lying.

You can trust me. I can change. Everyone can change.

_{Little by little, we lost ourselves. There was no moment where we looked in the mirror and wondered what we had become—for, in truth, this is what we wanted.}

What? Why?

_{There is a little voice inside everyone's heart that says... unkind things. People refuse to believe it's part of them. They push it down, hide it away. Then, one day, someone comes along and says...}

_{"It's okay. You can come out now."}

_{And that's all it takes.}

But if that's true, then... I mean, wouldn't that...

No. Oh, no.

Eh? What is saying?

_{...we could've been next the fiends.}

_{"Ashura" has overseen the cycle of fiends since the world began. You weren't supposed to turn him down, let alone defeat him. Now, the world is unbalanced. We were brought back as a wild, ineffective lurch towards equilibrium. It's ironic when you think about it. All that fury over the destruction we caused, and we're denied a peaceful rest for not doing our jobs.}

_{There. I've lived up to my end of the bargain. Now, you live up to yours.}

I hated you for what you did to Neo-Atlantis. But now, knowing all this... knowing where you came from... knowing the atrocities people committed while fighting you... I don't hate you anymore.

*BWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE*

I pity you.

...

Uh.

_{Hmm hmm hmm. Something the matter?}

But... but you said you wanted to die!

_{Oh, I do.}

But I never said I'd go down without a fight!

Surprise! The Hyper doesn't work on Su-Zaku 2! It makes this fight a major league pain in the ass, because now she can survive long enough to drop things like Tornado and Flame on us. You didn't get to see Tornado last time because we used an instakill, but it's one of the few boss attacks that hits everybody. On top of that, she has 4000 HP to plow through.

That's the bad news. The good news? Our armor loadout makes her physical attacks laughable. It's the elemental attacks that we need to worry about—and wouldn't you know it, we just so happen to have the Band helmet and leftover Dragon Armor. Even better, Dente is immune to just about every elemental attack in the game! We're in really good shape here.

Take this, you misanthropic ruffian!

SCREEEEEEEEEEE

Whew. Stiff breeze.

HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP

Trog?!

Ehn, I'm sure he'll be fine.

Trog not fine! Trog hanging from ledge!

I've got you, old friend! Heave, ho!

Looks like the rest of us are okay, though.

Yeah. Glad we kept that stuff from Cloud World!

Why are you wearing that Dragon armor, anyway? Don't you have your power suit?

I'm gonna level with you, Ell. I'm not even sure I'm wearing it anymore.

What are you doing? We're fighting! Stop having a dialogue in the middle of our fight!

Shh! The adults are talking.

Haha! Owned.

Even if I live a thousand lifetimes in the torturous embrace of undeath, it will be worth it just to see you die one last time.

Aw, that's so sweet.

I know, rite! You guys are total frienemies!

Why are you laughing! Stop laughing! Why are...

...

...ah. Of course.

HYAAAAAAAAAAH

Hey, you stick with whatever works.

Sword has carried day. Thanking, Honored Grandfather.

_{Well done, all of you. Hmm hmm hmm. The mice who roared.}

Smug to the very end. And where did it get you?

_{At least oblivion provides me with some small measure of comfort. But where you're going, Elly...}

_{...death is the least of your concerns.}

...

Let's all have a moment of silence for the passing of Su-Zaku.

...

Does anyone have anything they'd like to say?

Was never liking her.

She was quite overbearing, yes.

She was a big fat jerk forever and ever, amen. Oh well, life goes on. Treasure!

Well crud. Who's gonna use this katana? Trog's got XCaliber, and this isn't an Esper sword.

I'll take it.

Are you sure? You're... not the best at bladed weapons.

Sooner or later, Dente, we learn to live with things we don't like.

Wow! We're really far up!

And there's still more to go. Look over there!

Here's your moment, Rez.

What?

*nods towards stairs*

Oh. Oh, right!

*ahem*

Would that be... a stairway to heaven?

...

Ehn? Ehn?

Trog is not getting.

Space Elevator activated. Prepare for gravity catapult in 3... 2...

Just once, I'd like for someone to teleport uuuuuuuSSSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

*whistles*

How far up? Planet look so small below.

We must be in outer space. Man, look at that view. Base Town, Seaside, Cloud World, Neo-Atlantis...

Hey! I can see my house from here!

You can see everyone's house from here, I'd wager.

...

Elly?

It just makes you stop and think. There's entire towns going about their lives down there. They have no idea we're up here.

Is funny. Hear tales of gods, think, cannot happen. Is no place in sky where Gods watch. Trog would see.

Yeah?

Then, here is. In house of gods. Watching.

...

One more door.

Before we head in, let's took a look at our final loadouts.

Our front line fighters are about where you'd expect them to be, though perhaps a bit low on HP. Elly's wearing what I assume is a Kevlar vest, an anti-everything headband, laser pistols akimbo, a legendary katana, and her combat knife. The Catcraw, surprisingly, is her most damaging attack. The laser pistols are somewhat disappointing given how much they cost, but they apparently do group damage and cut through O-Physical, so it's something. In retrospect, I should've gone with the missile launcher.

Trog, meanwhile, has his fists and Excalibur. He's also packing an Elixir for emergencies, though it probably won't help against anyone that can hit Trog or Elly hard enough to KO them. Punch is still the most damaging attack at his disposal, but XCalibur (apparently?) does extra damage against undead, so it strikes a nice balance.

You'll note the Glass sword isn't equipped. There's nothing to stop us from using it 49 more times, but I consider that out of bounds for the purposes of this LP. It was intended to be used once and then broken, so we should respect the designers' wishes. _{(he says, perched atop his stone statue of Sei-Ryu)}

Dente's stats are ridiculous, as befitting a top tier monster. We've gone over his attacks already, but they're hard to appreciate without seeing all of them on one list. Quake is probably the best, followed by Flame and Bash. Beam is still a solid option for crowd control, though it's far less damaging than it once was.

And Rezen. Oh, Rezen. I have no idea how you managed to stop getting HP after the second world, but it's still hilarious. Moreover, she's had ESP, Armor, and Barrier since the second world. Something is very clearly bugged, and I suspect it's the emulator* I'm using. No matter. Rez has her Power Armor for protection, Psi and Armor in case things get really bad, and is equipped with a Flare spellbook and a Psi Sword. We've even got a Cure book equipped, just in case.

Remember Elly struggling to hit monsters with a bow? Rez getting into a damage race with a P-Frog and barely winning? Trog punching things for 25 damage? Our guys have really come a long way. I wanted to take a moment here, near the end, to reflect on how far. I'm proud of all of them.