Part 52: Nothing else materias

Chapter 52 - Nothing else materias


So we just had our meeting with Sephiroth.



He explained to us his completely crazy plan.



He wants to summon a gigantic magic meteor to crash into the planet.





Then he'll stay at the center of the cataclysmic event.



The planet will send Lifestream towards it to heal the wound and he'll absorb it all.



Quite out of nowhere we hear a roar.



And since it's been a while since our last boss fight and they had to fill the boss fight quota, here we go!







The Red Dragon is an average fight. It can be fairly hard if the group is unprepared for it but is very unlikely to wipe your party.



Like the vast majority of bosses he's vulnerable to Poison. As a Fire-themed dragon he absorbs Fire, which means Beta is useless, as well as our newest Summon Kujata (which deals Fire/Ice/Lightning damage).




Overall a fairly boring fight.



Talking about elements, he drops the [Dragon Armlet], a fairly powerful armor (with 6 linked slots) that halves the damage from... Fire/Ice/Lightning. Yeah.





Sephiroth uses maphack, noclip and gravity hack.



Killing the Dragon also yields us the [Bahamut] summon. The Bahamut is one of the better Summons. While it deals in theory less damage than Leviathan (and a lot less than Kujata), its damage is non-elemental and ignores the enemy defenses.



Moving on. That thing floating on the table it's a temple miniature.















Man I love useless JRPG multiple choice dialogues. Though if taken out of context this one is pretty amusing on its own.



Shaking it makes the entire temple trumble, other than that the options are useless.







That's some crazy development.



So let me see if I got this straight.



The Ancients built the Black Materia. Why?



I mean, it's not like they built the Temple to safeguard or contain the thing. The building is the materia.



Sure, you figured out a way to make some super deadly stuff that will invariably kill you. Isn't it smarter not to make it?



Unless it was made to kill something so horrible that total destruction would be preferrable, I suppose.



Man those Cetras weren't very good at surviving, no wonder they got extinct.



Well that truly sucks.







You'd be amazed at how long it took me to learn what flunkies meant, although the meaning is inductible.



You know what we should do? Take the spy using a robot machine and make him do it.



Oh.





Well when you put it this way.



We really have no choice.





There's no way to manipulate the clock anymore, so everything before the Dragon boss in the temple is a lost-forever. Room 12 is the exit - if you tried to access it before it resulted in a dead end.





Ok seriously game I know you love throwing bosses for no real reason but this is way too much.





Demon Gate is to most people the hardest boss in the game at this point.

His obscene amount of health at this point (10,000) makes him a great sample to showcase all the fun summons we've got so far that are otherwise absolutely useless, as well as Aeris' Limit 4-0.




And yes, that was Cloud's limit doing 62000+ damage.

Talking about Aeris, we just got a weapon that gives us +100% damage for each person who's dead. YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO.







And we award Aeris with the achievement "First character to reach damage cap." Thanks everyone.

And now, let's be really honest here.



I don't go around wasting my precious 4 Hero Drinks. This is how I really kill the bosses for my progression save. All of them. I just smash "confirm" and leave it.




Well it's not like we waited.





Well what am I gonna say? I'm glad you're doing the right thing even though that involves 0 loss for you?



Alright, I'll try to explain.



This was explained post-game in an interview about this whole sequence not making sense since Cait Sith is controlled.



The thing is that while Cait Sith is a controlled robot, the owner can't spend all his time controlling him.



Each robot is a sentient AI, so in this case he's really sacrificing himself (the robot, not the creator).



Oh cmon Aeris.



Tifa is right there. She even turns her back. For fuck's sake.



Oh.





I like how Cloud is stoic, seemingly not understanding what the hell is happening.



Uh



Oh...kay?



I want you to solve the puzzle and give us the black materia.



Seriously guys Tifa is RIGHT THERE and it's not like everyone but Cloud doesn't know she's into him.







Ok let's try to get in the mood. A sentient entity is about to die for the greater good.







Look I'll be honest with you, this is one of the strangest sequences in the game to me.



Again, a very meta-sequence. It's like he's talking to you, the player. Or the owner of the toy. I'm not sure.



If I were to guess, I'd say this sequence goes in with the theme of consciousness vs. materialism.



That is slightly linked to the other subjects I talked. In this case - is Cait Sith worthy of feeling empathy, even though he's not real?



This is also a metaphorical question in itself, because no one in this game exists. But it doesn't matter - humans can empathize with objects and constructs.



Personally I think Cait Sith (the character) fails at that. He's not believable enough, even within his own universe. No one's gonna cry for him, and only Aeris seemed to empathize with his plight.



Still, it's an amusing thing to think about.



And with Cait Sith's sacrifice and the Temple's destruction, we finish this update.


NEXT TIME:

More shit happens! Good lord will shit ever stop happening again? THE PLOT TRAIN WILL STOP FOR NOTHING.




Chapter 52 Bugs & Bytes

Date with Yuffie



Yuffie's date is considerably harder to get than Tifa's or Aeris'.



It's also 100% irrelevant to the plot and if you went for it I hate you.



You basically need to do everything possible in order to piss off Tifa and Aeris.



As well as being a greedy bastard overall.





This game is so wrong.





That's it ladies, gentlemen.



The most awkward date in gaming history.





With that in mind, it's also fucking hilarious.







Until next time!