Part 114: Chapter the Tenth: Grab the brass ring.

Chapter the Tenth: Grab the brass ring.
April 20, 2021-May 20, 2021

One point assures us a Champions League spot next year. One win at Wembley assures that our names will ring forever in the annals of the FA Cup. Let's do this thing.



Boumsong deserves to be called up. I'm just disappointed that he'll likely be back at Man United next year, I don't think they'll let a title rival like us keep him.



400 games at a club is quite a feat in a world where managers commonly get canned or headhunted after a couple years.



They're still talking about us as contenders? Neat, but unrealistic.

vs. Blackburn Rovers, April 24, 2021
Premier League


Blackburn are having themselves a season. Thanks to Manchester City winning the League Cup and both Manchester United and ourselves looking like Champions League locks, they're looking likely to pick up Europa League qualification. Our own title chances take a big hit before the game, with Manchester United thrashing Stoke 5-1 and pulling three points ahead with a game still in hand.

Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control.
Starting 11: Kovacevic, Cirjak, Boumsong (c), Todd, Dos Santos, Mair, Petts, Matko, Nieddu, Mujkic, Bastable.
Subs: Novotny, Feruga, Morvan, Djurovic, Bailey, Rouissi, Di Martino.

It's not looking good after eight minutes. Bastable has already missed a sitter, and Blackburn's Dan Collier hits us on the counter. We peg back immediately via Bastable's massive noggin, but the early excitement isn't over until Mick Collier, brother of Dan, puts the Rovers back up in the fifteenth minute.

The tables turn when we're awarded a penalty in first half stoppage time, which Bastable coolly converts to level the match. He's kicking himself just before the hour mark, though, when he misses a chance to put us up. Never fear, Nieddu picks up his teammate with the go ahead goal shortly thereafter. Blackburn's keeper had fired a free kick from near the corner flag, which our Italian import intercepted while the keeper was still miles away from getting back in front of the goal. It was as simple a finish as could be from forty yards out, made possible by Dimitri's excellent vision and anticipation. Blackburn gives us a final jolt when they bang the crossbar with twenty minutes remaining, but threaten no further. We've clinched a top four finish Champions League football with three games left.

Man of the Match: Rocky Bastable




Wrexham 3-2 Blackburn



Cardiff showed some signs of life in the last couple months, but they'd dug themselves far too deep a hole to climb out of. Southampton aren't safe yet, but they've opened a three point lead over Bristol City and a four point one over West Ham while retaining a game in hand.



I'm eager to pay this bonus for the second year in a row, he's now tied for second most goals in the league. He'd have to go on a real streak to pass the leader, Mark Bloem of Manchester City, but after a slow start to the year the Bastard of Wrexham is having a solid sophomore campaign.



Bastable has also been decisive in several of our cup matches, which has allowed him to break his own club record.



This is his 10th appearance on a team of the week, making him one of the most regularly featured players in the league. He's joined by most of the Tottenham starting eleven after their thrashing of Swansea.



Really? Nieddu is a pacy attacking midfielder with little to no defensive value. Simpson is a slow, stout holding midfielder who excels at winning the ball from opponents. No wonder you had such a high eccentricity rating, Chaz. Our former captain is having a very good year for Bradford, averaging a 7 rating while featuring regularly. I'm glad he's found success after leaving us last year.



Dude, we qualified for the Champions League in our second season after three straight promotions from the lower leagues. Are you trying to motivate my players for me? Because this is an exemplar of bulletin board material.



Morvan was excellent while filling in for Mair, he'll feature more often in the midfield over time and looks like he's going to be a star for the club.



Sure, give the award to the guy who has a £150,000,000 payroll at his disposal instead of the guy who won just as many games, didn't lose, and has a payroll less than 20% as large. I'm sure that it was so much harder for poor little Manchester City than mighty Wrexham.

At Arsenal, May 1, 2021
Premier League


Assuming that Manchester United don't implode in an unimaginably horrific fashion, the only question remaining at the top end of the table is which team is forced into the final qualifier round before the Champions League group stage. Whoever finishes fourth are going to be overwhelming favorites to make the group stage, but it does mean two additional games added onto the start of the season. I'd like to avoid them, we're going to be a thin squad next year and playing more games than we have in a long while.

Starting Formation: 4-4-1-1 Counter
Starting 11: Kovacevic, Cirjak, Boumsong (c), Todd, Dos Santos, Djurovic, Mair, Petts, Mujkic, Nieddu, Bastable.
Subs: Novotny, Feruga, O'Hanlon, Morvan, Bailey, Matko, Di Martino.

After a quarter hour Arsenal has had a ton of possession but taken no shots. The two squads are probing each other like heavyweight boxers in the early rounds. Arsenal finally creates some chances, but don't finish them. I move Nieddu out wide at the hour mark, he and Cirjak reward me by causing Arsenal's defense fits after a throw-in. Nieddu is able to pass the ball from the right edge of the area to Bastable in the six yard box. Bastable can't miss from that close, 1-0 Wrexham. Arsenal proceed to pile up shots late in the game, but can't force an equalizer before the final whistle. Diego Dos Santos and Cyril Boumsong are the heroes of our defense, and we leave North London having done just enough to win.

Man of the Match: Diego Dos Santos




Arsenal 0-1 Wrexham



The win moves us fleetingly into first place, as our game ended before the Manchester megabastards kick off. Even the ephermal nature of our table topping position is something to be proud of. Going from non-league football to the apex of the Premiership with just three weeks remaining in the season over the course of seven years is an unheard of feat, made even moreso by the fact that we're a fan owned club and have done it without an uberwealthy sugar daddy ladling money into the coffers.



Take it! You earned every last farthing, Bastable. But I thought your bonus was only £120k?



Jaroch is right to be upset, while we did a good job defending Arsenal have only themselves to blame for not scoring a single time. But that's what happens when mind games backfire. Your opponents are motivated and your own players believe their own hype.



We surprised Arsenal by breaking out the 4-4-1-1 and it played a large role in our success today.



The victory also gives us a ten game winning streak, the longest of my career to date.



Woah, that's a lot more money than I'm used to. Did the game get patched while I wasn't looking?

No, it turns out that a bug switched the valuations over to US dollars, while still being listed as pounds sterling. Easily corrected, and you won't have to share my confusion as to why every monetary value in the game changed.

vs. Derby, May 4, 2021
Premier League


We're running out the reserves today, we play the FA Cup Final in four days and I don't want to risk anyone's health or stamina before that match. Manchester United thumped Liverpool the day prior, while Manchester City might catch them if they drop more points we're not going to and as such it's time to play the kids.

Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Novotny, Dos Santos, Feruga, O'Hanlon, Mejasic, Morvan, Dixon, Matko, Bailey (c), Di Martino, Aarts.
Subs: Noble, Russell, Ludwig, Alvaro, Rouissi, Argenti, De Blasio

Derby jump on top before the first ten minutes are out on a free kick golazo. We have some success controlling the pace of the game, but can't score an equalizer. Novotny makes an impact in the 52nd minute when he saves a penalty, but can't stop Derby from putting one past him as the game enters the final third. We finally wake up and start besieging Derby's goal, but it's too little too late, and we pay even further when Kais Rouissi goes off injured in the 81st minute. I'm not surprised at the loss, Derby are a decent team and this match was intended to blood our youth while ensuring we were fresh for the FA Cup final. It's still disappointing that we couldn't do a better job.




Wrexham 0-2 Derby



Two months is a lot of time for a sixteen year old to miss and will set back his development.



That's interesting, I wonder who's behind the speculation. Blackburn have a ton of history, some of it fairly recent, and are currently a solid club. If they add a sugar daddy owner we're looking at the fight for top four getting even fiercer.



Manchester City now have a chance to win the league, they're a point up on United and each have two games left to play. It's looking like our last game will be quite important. It's also looking like United are a bit gassed, they've won a mere three of their last seven games. They did make the Champions League final, though, and will play Arsenal on May 22nd. If all goes right they could still win the triple, but they're not as imposing as they looked a couple months ago.



I'm hoping that their fatigue carries over into this match.



McLeod's not wrong, Aarts has been our worst first team player. But he's definitely daft if he thinks Aarts is going to even be on the bench for the match.

vs. Manchester United, May 8, 2021
FA Cup, Final


There's no point playing scared. We're going out in our most successful formation, and we're going to show United why we're going to Europe next year. Boumsong is restricted from playing, making Meteor our Johnny on the spot not just for our offense but our inspiration as well.



It's clear that Manchester United's players are feeling the burn from so much play. They're starting backups at striker and left winger, and three-fourths of their back line are fatigued before the whistle blows. Meanwhile, we've got our starting eleven sans Boumsong, and everyone is rested and ready for the match.

Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Kovacevic, Cirjak, Feruga, Todd, Mejasic, Mair, Petts, Nieddu, Shirra, Mujkic (c), Bastable.
Subs: Novotny, Dos Santos, Lewis, Morvan, Djurovic, Matko, Di Martino.

It's disaster early, when United hit us on a fast break to take an early lead. As we enter the middle third of the game we're carving up United's sluggish, tired defense. Even so, our possession and shot advantage has yet to tell.

At 32 minutes Mujkic watches a shot bounce clear off the woodwork, and less than a minute later Shirra can't convert our best chance of the day. The pressure continues to build on United, and when Meteor gets another chance in the 35th minute he doesn't miss. It's all level at Wembley.

Less than a minute after the goal Scott Shirra has to be stretchered from the field after his knee goes in a direction that would only be natural in some birds. It doesn't seem like an intentional injury, but I'm still glowering darkly at my counterpart in the other technical box. Nieddu slides into the middle to replace him, and just a couple minutes later gives us the lead with a run where he nutmegs the Manchester centerback marking him before beating the keeper one on one.

United still have chances, but their striker can't get his header down and Man U miss an opportunity to pull even at 50 minutes. We trade chances at the hour mark, with Kovacevic making an important save and Man U has to clear a Mujkic shot off the line minutes later. United appear to be getting more dangerous as the game goes on, but Kovacevic stonewalls them each time. Their desperation becomes more and more apparent, just as it becomes apparent that they just don't have the legs for a comeback. The last ten minutes are all Wrexham, and while we don't add on a third goal it doesn't matter. We just beat Manchester United at Wembley in the FA Cup final, and we did it while playing confident, controlling football.

Man of the Match: Richard Petts




Wrexham 2-1 Manchester United



The Dragonz Lair edition released just after the final is a 10 minute long yawp of delight from Grwn.



That's pretty cocky, guys, especially since you were telling me in the boardroom that you only expected us to get to the 6th round.




The squad bonuses are more than covered by the prize money, which has finally gotten to an amount worth mentioning.



Hey, Chelsea went out to the eventual champs. Losing to a team of our quality is nothing to be ashamed of.



This marks merely the start of our reign over not just British football but the entire world. All other clubs will behold our terrible beauty, and despair.



It's not all joy in Wales. Shirra's injury is bad luck, he arrived just after the United defender and busted his knee when he collided with the other player's foot. He'll be fine and ready for action next season.



I told you he'd come around. You'll always have a place on this team, Rock. I'm glad you've finally realized what we're building here.



Well crap. Petts has been excellent all season, usurping Djurovic's starting role. He's been especially deadly from the corner flag, his accuracy on corner kicks has resulted in a lot of goals.

vs. Manchester City, May 16, 2021
Premier League


The winner of this match could determine the winner of the league. If Manchester United draw or lose and Manchester City wins, City will win the title. It will also likely determine which club has to go through a qualifying round in the Champions league, if we win we are certain to proceed directly to the group stage, while a loss would likely see us forced into a home-away playoff to enter the Champions League group stage. What I'm saying is that there's a lot riding on this. There would be even more riding on it if I'd had us go all out to beat Derby, we would have been in the title fight ourselves. I can't be too upset, seeing as resting our players did result in our first major scalp, but this season could have been even more magical.

Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Kovacevic, Cirjak, Boumsong (c), Todd, Mejasic, Mair, Djurovic, Matko, Nieddu, Mujkic, Bastable.
Subs: Novotny, Dos Santos, Lewis, Morvan, Bailey, Di Martino, Aarts.

City aren't going to roll over for us, they're playing for keeps and preventing us from playing our possession game starting at the opening whistle. A Bastable breakaway draws first blood in the 18th minute, and for the rest of the half things are once again going to plan as we force City into a defensive huddle. We're profligate, though, and despite peppering the goal can't double our lead. Manchester City close out the first half with an equalizer, dragging us back to even despite our obvious superiority. They then take the lead in the 54th minute, hitting us again on the counter. The Bastard puts one in a minute later, but it's for naught as he was offside. It's the last time the ball is fished from the back of the net in the game. It's victory for the visitors, and a fourth place finish for us. We had the game in our hands and let it slip away.




Wrexham 1-2 Manchester City



I'm not sure why it took until the end of the season for our spot to be confirmed, we locked it down before the month of May even began. A fourth place finish is still an impressive achievement, and one I look forward to repeating for years to come. This is by far and away the quickest that I've ever guided a team to the Champions League, in past games it's taken five years in the Premiership and multiple fifth place finishes before breaking the megabastard hegemony.



Gotta leave some room for improvement next year. We weren't eliminated from title contention until the final week of the season.



“You just qualified for the Champions League, how do you feel?”
“Disrespected and irritable.”
“Thanks for the comment, Coach Belichick!”



It's a good thing we've kept them from at least winning the FA Cup, they could add the Champions League title in a week. Also, three exclamation marks? What is this, Bleacher Report?




It took until the final games of the season, but Southampton survive. I expect better from you next season, Sky Shadowing.




And just think, we're going to see even greater income next year thanks to the Champions League. It's good to be on top.



I'm disappointed that we finished fourth in the league, especially given how well we played in our final match. But we're going to the Champions League next season, and we've cleared out a place of pride in the trophy cabinet for our first FA Cup. It's been a monstrously successful season, and one that will be remembered for decades to come as announcing ourselves heirs to the throne of club football.



BOARD VOTES

(Debonairly) We did it. We're in the Champions League and we've won the most prestigious national cup competition on Earth. We can't afford to rest on our laurels, though. If you want us to repeat this type of success, and make some noise on the continent, you're going to have to open up the purse-strings. Reaching the knockout rounds of the Champions League will add a minimum of ten games to our schedule. We will also have the Community Shield to contest next August, against Manchester United. It's not an important competition, but it is another match we have to play. The most important thing to do this offseason is to add depth to the squad that will allow us to handle the increased fixture load we'll face without losing a step in the Premier League. But first, as always, our finances.



Non-transfer income was up £16m this year. Getting to the group stage of the Champions League will add another £10m to that total. Merchandise sales topped seven figures for the first time, and as our sponsorships come up for renewal we can expect substantial boosts from that category as well.



Our net income declined, however, due to an increase in “non-soccer expenses” of over £13m. This is believed to be related to our purchase of the Racecourse Grounds. We also saw an additional increase of £7m in tax liability, and that will likely grow larger at the end of the month. Along with our increased player and coach wages, we spent nearly £25m more than we did the prior season.



That still gives us a £12m yearly profit, and £33m in cold hard cash sitting in our club accounts. We're now the eighth most valuable club in England with a valuation of £173m, surpassing Liverpool. We're also considered the richest club in England thanks to our healthy balance sheet, topping the likes of the Manchesters, Arsenal, and Chelsea.

QUESTION ONE: Transfer and Wage Budget

(Intently) We have spent £26m this past season on player wages and bonuses. We have £33m in the bank, and earned a profit of £12m last year. The transfer budget currently sits at £10.4m thanks to player sales and unspent prior funds, that will be available in addition to the amount decided on in this question. Please state the amount you would like to put towards player wages and the transfer budget, along with your choices on the other votes. Last season the Board agreed to a £40m wage/transfer expense, I would hope given the needs of the club and the health of our finances that amount would be drastically increased. Lastly, please try to limit your vote to a range between £20m and £100m, £20m is already £6m less than our current wages and £100m would very likely spend the entirety of our cash reserve.

QUESTION TWO: Training Facilities Upgrade

(Knowingly) One of the keys to attracting the best talent is having the best facilities. While our training facilities remain excellent, we do not yet match our new peers in state of the art technology and amenities. I would like to begin the process of closing this gap.

A) (Agreeably) Capital! We shall have plans drawn up at once. (Training facilities improved, £3.7m spent)

B) (Bemusedly) We've already got excellent training facilities. Why do we need to go all University of Oregon? (Training facilities not improved)

QUESTION THREE: Youth Facilities Upgrade

(Sagaciously) In order to produce more brilliant young players I would like to see an upgrade made to those facilities as well. The Justin Bailey Sheepfold with Training Flock will provide our players with even more ways to reach their full potential by honing their agility and wits while providing them with the protein necessary for growing boys.

A) (Decisively) We dislike your attempts to use Justin Bailey to get us to spend more money. (Youth Facilities not improved)

B) (Happily) Justin Bailey? No need to say more. Agreed. (Youth Facilities Upgraded, £4m spent)

QUESTION FOUR: Youth Level Improvement

(Finally) We remain behind other Premier League teams when it comes to our youth development level. I would like to push us to the next level.

A) (Cordially) We must keep up with the megabastards, what? (Youth Level Improved)

B) (Derisively) You've yet to use one of our academy players in the first team, why should we spend even more money on local lads that will never play for the first team? (Youth Level unchanged)

Voting will close on May 23rd at 9am, EST.