Part 119: Chapter the First: Fixture congestion.
Chapter the First: Fixture congestionAugust 6, 2021-September 1, 2021
If you look back at the last few years we've only had four matches scheduled in August. This year we've got six. We play in Glasgow and then host Celtic to see which of us makes it to the group stage of the Champions League, we have our standard three league matches, and we kick off the season by playing Manchester United in the Community Shield. The only thing taken off our schedule is the second round of the Capital One Cup, as we're playing in a European competition we've been given a bye into the third round rather than the second.
90,000 fans at Wembley Stadium means a lot of gate receipts. Given that we spent over £50m in the close season on players, improvements, and purchasing our stadium we could use the money.
vs. Manchester United, August 8, 2021
Community Shield
The Community Shield, previously the Charity Shield, is contested by the winner of the Premier League and the winner of the FA Cup. In years where the winner of the Premier League also won the FA Cup, the second placed Premier League team plays them. It's a glorified friendly, but it's still a trophy. That makes this a good chance to get our team going at full speed into the season. Our ex-captain, Cyril Boumsong, is in the starting lineup for Manchester United, he improved a great deal while on loan with us and is likely to be a key player from them over the next decade. They're also starting an unproven teenage keeper, a sign that they're not taking this game as seriously as we are. We'll make them pay for that.
Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Kovacevic, Cirjak (c), Todd, Laux, Suslov, Morvan, Petts, Nieddu, Shirra, Mujkic, Bastable.
Subs: El Sayed, Pejkovic, Feruga, Mair, Djurovic, Matko, Cardozo.
We jump out to a lead with a classic Meteor streak down the sideline followed by a cross from near the byline. Manchester United's 18 year old keeper mistimes his jump and can't get a glove on the ball, and it reaches a lurking Nieddu at the far post. The ensuing tap in put us ahead at fourteen minutes. Five minutes later Cirjak plays an incisive pass to Nieddu on the break. Nieddu feeds the ball ahead to Bastable, who skips ahead of Boumsong's last ditch effort. The rookie keeper can't react quickly enough to the shot, 2-0. We look dominant and the Red Devils look all out of sorts.
The the worm turns. Kovacevic gets a piece of Shahed Parr's shot in the 24th minute, but deflects it into the net and is unfairly punished with an own goal for his efforts. Just minutes later Todd misplays a header clearance directly to an opposing midfielder, who sends it ahead to Parr for a breakaway and the equalizer. After jumping out to a lead in the first twenty minutes, we've been dragged back to even after half an hour. It gets worse from there, as United dominate the rest of the half. They take the lead before the half courtesy a free kick from parallel the penalty spot. We cant clear it, and when it's in the back of the net United have stormed back from a two goal deficit.
They seal the result at 85 minutes with another set piece goal, this time from a corner, and despite an answer from Bastable two minutes later we can't find a fourth goal before the final whistle. We started the game motivated and ready to take the fight to our opponents. After twenty minutes of thrashing them we got lazy and lost our edge while Manchester regained theirs. The first trophy of the year slips from our fingers.
Man of the Match: Rocky Bastable.
Wrexham 3-4 Manchester United
He never developed and was proven woefully unprepared for Premier League football. We recouped the amount we spent on him, at least.
I negotiated this up from an initial offer of £6.5m. Djurovic is still a very good player, but now that we most commonly play without a standard right midfielder and because Petts has usurped his central midfield role, he isn't a member of our starting eleven. Julio is good enough to play his role when we need to rotate Petts out for rest, and has a chance to be better than Djurovic in the long run.
We're making a profit of £8m on this sale even with the percentage we have to forward to Galatasary, and given that we're presently £16.8m in the red after this summer's spending I want to get us closer to break even. The bean counters are telling me we're going to make a £22m profit this season, and that's not counting the money we'll make by reaching the group stage in the Champions League, but I don't like seeing big red numbers when I look at our balance sheet and Djurovic won't get much more valuable.
Suffer in agony, Americanos! I would have won that match, and El Tri would have had to flee the Azteca in fear of their lives.
That's a pity, I was hoping to see a transfer embargo slapped down for the last couple weeks of the window. I want every advantage possible to undermine the current lord and master of club football.
The TV revenue will become much larger when we make it past Celtic.
Everton's managers have a habit of not liking me, but they're the ones who keep getting sacked.
vs. Everton, August 14, 2021
Premier League
We'll see how the players hold up playing every three or four days, for now I want to get the most out of our first team and see ourselves start the season with a whole lot of points.
Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Kovacevic, Cirjak (c), Todd, Laux, Suslov, Mair, Petts, Nieddu, Shirra, Mujkic, Bastable.
Subs: El Sayed, Feruga, Pejkovic, Morvan, Julio, Matko, Cardozo.
After a quarter hour we've had 72% possession and nothing to show for it. After a half hour it's still 72% possession and nothing to show for it. When Everton scores against the run of play, it's on their first shot all day and some of the first moments they've had the ball in our third of the field. The half comes to a close, and we're losing despite having had 68% possession and 13 shots to their 1. We finally equalize in the 52nd minute, thanks to Nieddu picking the pocket of an Everton defender right at the byline, and scooting the ball over to a wide open and waiting Bastable. It's the only goal we'll get.
Despite our utter dominance of the stats sheet we drop points at home on opening day. To have 19 shots and only 5 on target is pathetic. To have 9 chances and only 1 goal is pathetic. To not win despite a lackluster performance from Everton is pathetic. If I could execute a player as decimation for the squad's failure in this game to put the rest on notice, I would.
Wrexham 1-1 Everton
We follow up a disappointing result with disappointing season ticket sales. I can't believe that with 58,000 club members we have fewer than 9,000 season ticket holders.
All of England shall be forced to watch the much better football being played in Wales.
Shut up, Meteor. I promised him last year that the club could match his ambitions by making the Europa League. Instead we made the Champion's League, and he's pissed that I didn't follow through on my promise. He doesn't seem to actually be unhappy, and doesn't react to my refusal to transfer list him. I guess this was a pro-forma demand. Or more likely it's a bug in the game.
At Celtic, August 18, 2021
Champion's League, Best Placed Playoff Away Leg
Scotland's teams have been done a world of good on the continental stage by Celtic's run to the final a few years back, they now have their champion go straight to the group stage while the runner up has a shot of making the group stage via two rounds of the best placed playoffs.
As A Tartan Tory would happily tell you, Celtic are only the second most titled club in Scotland, still four first division titles back from Rangers despite nearly a decade of wins while Rangers rebuilt themselves (ed note: we regret the error in the original version). The reason we're playing them now is because they got trumped at long last by their resurgent cross-town foes, and forced into the Champions League qualifiers. We should have little trouble with them, they're one of the two best teams in Scotland and possess a world class central midfielder but they'd be merely a top half team in England.
Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Kovacevic, Cirjak (c), Laux, Todd, Suslov, Morvan, Petts, Nieddu, Shirra, Mujkic, Bastable.
Subs: El Sayed, Pejkovic, Feruga, Mair, Julio, Cardozo, Aarts.
I guess my negative estimate of their chances got around to the Celtic lockers, because they come out determined to prove us wrong. A rampant start begets a Celtic lead inside the first ten minutes, and I have to switch us to a counter-attacking posture as our possession game is proving completely ineffective. The change works, and soon we're making slashing runs through the Celtic defense.
After half an hour the tactical shift pays off. Shirra flat outworks his counterpart to a ball in the corner and delivers a cross that Bastable craniums in to equalize, and after 32 minutes it's tied and we've gotten a vital away goal. We get another when Bastable uses his silky smooth first touch to control a difficult ball and then with his second touch places it deftly past the keeper. Celtic's players gern about offside, but Bastable clearly had a man in front of him when Petts delivered the ball.
Celtic remain dangerous, it's clear that our back line of Suslov, Todd, Laux, and Cirjak have yet to cohere into a seamless unit, but we keep creating chances of our own that we just can't capitalize on. I bring Julio in as a sub, and he proves himself a worthy replacement for Djurovic by capping the game with our third away goal near the end of the match. We leave Glasgow in great shape to advance to the group stage, we could lose 2-0 next week and still move on.
Man of the Match: Rocky Bastable
Celtic 1-3 Wrexham
Playing a midweek match every week is draining. By March 2022 we're going to have some tired legs.
At Blackburn Rovers, August 21, 2021
Premier League
: Yuo are playing many backups. Why disrespect for Poland owned team?
: No, I'm not disrespecting you. I just need to rotate players to keep everyone fit. And our reserves are really good!: We will make you pay for this, just like we make UKIP pay for trying take Polish jobs by buying English football team!Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Kovacevic, Pejkovic, O'Hanlon, Feruga (c), Mejasic, Mair, Julio, Matko, Nieddu, Cardozo, Aarts.
Subs: El Sayed, Cirjak, Todd, Dixon, Shirra, Mujkic, Bastable.
The first half is reminiscent of the Everton match, except with more goals. Aarts scores his first competitive goal in ages on a breakaway, but Blackburn responds on their first shot of the game after 23 minutes. Nieddu restores the lead, but Blackburn ties it just before the half on their second shot of the game. Aarts knocks one off the upright in the second half, and isn't finishing when it counts, but Nieddu inspires the visiting fans to song with a brilliant free kick goal in the 67th minute. We keep piling on pressure, but despite eight clear cut chances we have only three goals. Hard work pays off, though, when El Juez locks down the game with a clean finish on a killer ball from Julio in the 82nd minute. Deciding that the scoreline isn't intimidating enough, El Juez adds to his verdict less than 90 seconds later. After some cause for concern in the first half, we poured it on just as we should.
Man of the Match: Dimitri Nieddu.
Blackburn 2-5 Wrexham
Argentina proves itself to have the best youth, at least when it comes to international competition.
El Juez is off to a fierce start, he's still no Bastard but thus far he looks like a major improvement on Di Martino from last year. His ability to create and score will give us additional punch off the bench late in games, and he'll be able to spell Bastable and Mujkic when they're worn down.
vs. Celtic, August 24, 2021
Champions League, Best Placed Playoff Home Leg
Celtic need to win by a score of 3-0 or better to advance. They need to do that with their backs to the wall, away from home. They're not going to.
Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Kovacevic, Cirjak (c), Laux, Todd, Suslov, Morvan, Petts, Matko, Shirra, Mujkic, Bastable.
Subs: El Sayed, Pejkovic, Feruga, Mair, Julio, Cardozo, Aarts.
We have an early possession lead, and are content to let time tick down against Celtic. When Oleg Suslov scores in the 35th minute our victory becomes even more likely. Celtic now needs to score four times to beat us. They do get a goal in the 57th minute, but it's far too little, far too late. They play with fury born of desperation, but despite additional opportunities cannot whittle away further at our lead as the inexorable march of time proceeds. When the final whistle blows, we've secured our spot in the group stage, and sent the 51 time champions of Scotland packing off to the Europa League. I still would have liked to win outright, but I can't complain about the result.
Wrexham 1-1 Celtic
It turns out you can charge a lot of money for Champions League tickets.
A new contract? Well, I'm listening.
A new contract with a £29,000 pay cut? Why are you wasting my time?
Ah, that sweet, sweet Champion's league cash is starting to roll in. We're now just £4.8m in the red, an amount that would easily be wiped clear by the lump sum we'll get at the end of our Premier League season.
We're a fourth seed thanks to our comparative lack of success in the recent past, with just one fourth place finish in the Premier League and an FA Cup trophy to go along with no Continental play. That means we're going to get drawn with three teams with more past success than we have, it also means that our group is likely to be a group of death as we're miles better than the average fourth seed squad hailing from places like Hungary and Denmark.
We do not want to be drawn into Groups A, C, F or H.
Whew. Schalke, Valencia, and Marseilles are all good, solid clubs- there's not going to be any gimmes out of our six matches against them- but I think we're the best team of the four and we have a very good chance of advancing to the knockout stage.
We get an easy draw in the League Cup, Wolves remain a good Championship side while we're now deserving Champions League participants.
Cirjak gets a rest when I'm sure he'd rather be playing for his national team. I'm a bit irked on his behalf, he's just as good as the right backs picked ahead of him.
vs. Swansea, August 28, 2021
Premier League, Welsh Derby
With no Cwp to contest, all that's left is a North vs. South Welsh derby. Swansea remain a good team, and we'll have to do a professional job against them. The international break is rapidly approaching, I'll be able to rest players over that time and thus can use my first choice starting eleven.
Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Kovacevic, Cirjak (c), Laux, Todd, Suslov, Mair, Petts, Nieddu, Shirra, Mujkic, Bastable.
Subs: El Sayed, Pejkovic, Feruga, Morvan, Julio, Cardozo, Aarts.
The first half sees us bestride the pitch like colossi, playing a high possession game where we create chances at will from the wide areas thanks to Nieddu and Mujkic. The latter is to thank for our first goal, he delivered a sweet ball to Shirra that was volleyed home just before the half. Swans have only our profligacy to thank that they're not down three-nil at the half, they've yet to even take a shot against us.
As we saw against Blackburn, that sort of mastery on the pitch tends to pay off over time as the opposition fatigues, and our hard work pays off in second half. Todd picks up a goal by being in the right place at the right time in the aftermath of an indirect free kick at 52 minutes, then the Swans defense leaves Mujkic all alone in front of the net and suffer the resultant Meteor strike four minutes late. Shirra makes it 4-0 with his second goal of the game just after the hour, and I can bring on subs with the game tucked away. Swansea denies us a clean sheet, finally scoring on their first shot of the day after seventy minutes of play, but the game was even more lopsided than the final tally indicates. Thanks to our high octane offense we sit atop the table after three matches.
Man of the Match: Scott Shirra
Wrexham 4-1 Swansea
I'd forgotten I'd even put that clause into the Upson transfer. He never got into a game for Swansea, but they foisted him off on Derby for twice what they paid us.
At the close of the window we now have wages in line with the majority of the Premier League, spending a reasonable £44m a year. This marks the first time since our League Two days that our salary didn't sit amongst the bottom three of the division, and we remain vastly outspent by the megabastards.
First place in the Premier League and into the group stage of the Champions League. I can't complain. Well, I can, we really should have beaten Man U in the Community Shield, and not winning the Everton match is unacceptable to both myself and the fans who haven't stopped complaining about it. I'll have to see how well we handle the strain of continental play, we've already been sending out our best players two to three times a week in just the first month. If we can't keep up our stamina this hot start could fade and we could struggle.
