Part 145: Chapter the Twelfth: The Champions League final.

Manchester United vs. Wrexham
Champions League Final at the Santiago Bernabeu, Madrid
7pm GMT on May 27, 2023.

Live streaming at http://www.twitch.tv/thehabeasdorkus

18:36: Welcome to the Santiago Bernabeu in Madrid for the 2023 Champions League final between two Premier League clubs with very different histories. On one hand you have Manchester United, who need no introduction. On the other you have Premier League titlists Wrexham, seeking to not only win their first top division title in their nearly 160 year history but also do the double. Lineups and formations shortly.

18:44: Both teams are coming out in their usual 4-2-3-1 formations, the starting lineup for Wrexham has Kovacevic in goal, Cirjak, Laux, Todd, and Suslov along the back line, Morvan and Petts in the midfield, Argenti, Shirra, and the captain "Meteor" Mujkic behind striker Bastable. United have Penn, Boumsong, Alonso, Duval in front of Marchan, Anelka, Leadbitter, Schumacher, Collecott, and Gregorio, with Yeliseev in goal.

18:47: Oddsmakers have actually made Wrexham the favorites for this match, largely thanks to the brilliant form they were in as they closed out an incredibly tense title chase to end the season nearly two weeks ago.

18:50: In pre-match press conference comments, manager Scott Brown was asked how he'll likely play against Manchester United in what is without a doubt the most important game in Wrexham history. He replied "we're going to punch them in the nose, and then punch them in the balls, and then punch them in the solar plexus. Then we're going to do it again after halftime." Sounds like he believes the oddsmakers, or trying to build up confidence from his boys.

18:55: We're five minutes from start, it's time to hit the head if you need to.

18:58: And Rule Britannia is played, which is still hard to get used to even nearly a half-decade after the UKIP government made it the new national anthem in 2020.

Peep! And we're underway!

1' Morvan makes an excellent tackle in the area to take the ball away from Schumacher.

3' Morvan makes a nice interception, but United get it right back. Collecott spoils the move by being offside, though.

5' It's been all United here early, repeatedly getting into dangerous positions against Wrexham.

6' GOAL! ARGENTI! What an interception and the Italian puts it away from range!

8' And then Shirra nearly breaks away right afterwards! The Wrexham counter was sure impressive in the last two minutes.

9' Inches wide from Mujkic on a Suslov cross, Wrexham has looked much better since the first five minutes.

13' RG writes in "I'm torn by this match. I want so much for everything Welsh to succeed and yet I feel strangely drawn to United. What am I to do?" Good question, that. Meanwhile, Wrexham wins a corner.

14' It looks like Scott Shirra has taken a knock, but he's up and gamely running again.

16' SD writes "I know just how RG feels, I too was in that situation recently. It comes down to this, Wales needs our support more than any big club does." Meanwhile, Cyril Boumsong clears a Mujkic free kick.

19' Benny Arnold from the United States writes in that "you gotta dance with what brung ya, loyalty is the most important quality a person can have." On the pitch this match has been very even, but Wrexham is still ahead as Argenti misplays his first touch and Yeliseev easily handles the attempt.

20' Argenti just misses scoring again! He was just a step offside on another Wrexham attack.

22' A free kick in a dangerous spot is eventually cleared by Suslov. He races downfield on an overlapping run and gets in place to make a cross but sends it into the stands behind the net.

26' Wrexham with another nice bit of movement, but Petts sends the ball over the net from range.

28' GW writes from Mt. Vernon "What would Mr. Arnold know about loyalty? I bet he's the type of guy who changes sides in a paintball gun match!"

30' At 30 minutes it's still Wrexham up 1, but United have been pressing for an equalizer and Wrexham's attacks keep coming to naught at the edge of the box. United are repeatedly taking the ball away from Wrexham and preventing them from setting up play.

34' B Arnold writes back "Oh, if it's not George. I switched sides when you guys told me you didn't want me! What else did you expect? Loyalty is a two way street!"

35' GOAL! Steve Collecott with a finish that Kovacevic got his hands on but couldn't stop! It's all tied up here!

37' Cyril Boumsong makes yet another important play against Rocky Bastable, he's marked the Australian to within an inch of his life today.

40' GOAL! Kovacevic was his own undoing there, and Grigorio chips him after stealing his pass!

43' PENALTY! Argenti is fouled inside the box!

44' GOAL! Shirra converts and we're all tied up again!

45' United have a chance from a corner, but Grigorio sends it juuuuust wide.

Peep! What a half, thoughts in a moment.

Halftime Both teams have had spells of looking dangerous, but United's defense has been excellent when Wrexham is in their third while Wrexham has repeatedly allowed marauding runs from Grigorio and Collecott. If they don't fix that, they won't win this trophy.

Peep! And we're back on!

50' Both sides are playing high tempo football, but neither has anything to show for it yet.

52' Boumsong has been ever present when Wrexham sends a ball into the box for United.

54' Mujkic has the ball one on one from a wide angle and blasts it wide for a goal kick. Wrexham are looking like they feel the pressure a bit here.

56' Yeliseev forced to make an excellent save on a shot by Mujkic after an incisive Bastable pass. It's still two-all here in Madrid.

60' It looks like we have a substitution, Justin Bailey will be coming on in place of Richard Petts.

64' Bastable heads it just wide in the best chance Wrexham has had in some time, but to be fair their defense looks better than it had in the latter part of the first half.

66' Shirra feeds Mujkic in the box, but a last second tackle prevents a scoring chance. My correspondents seem rapt with the match and emails have slowed to a trickle.

69' Still tied here at the Bernabeu, but Wrexham are looking more likely to make something happen.

71' Shirra is able to get into the box but takes one touch too many and the eventual attempt goes sailing over the crossbar.

72' Todd is yellow carded for a trip, after several cautions from the ref.

75' Wrexham wins a corner, which goes for naught as Manchester United bring off Schumacher and bring on Lorenz.

78' United are now the team with a lot of possession in their opponents half, as they work to break down Wrexham.

79' GOAL! Rockey Bastable finds net from a narrow angle! 3-2 Wrexham!

81' Save by Kovacevic on a Collecott effort after he beats two men and gets a one on one!

83' Bastable tries to chip Yeliseev under pressure, but can't get it past the Russian.

86' It looks like another substitution for Wrexham, this time young fullback Steve Reed is coming on for Oleg Suslov, presumably for fresh legs in the final five minutes plus stoppage time. Suslov comes off immediately after earning a yellow card for a tackle on Steve Collecott.

87' GOAAAAL! Collecott brings United back from the verge of defeat with a bender that Kovacevic doesn't get to! It's 3-3 in the 87th minute!

90' A corner for Wrexham that's cleared off the line! Boumsong is hurt, and United are down to 10 men!

90+2 Mujkic can't miss, but a United defender just gets a piece of it and sends it wide!

Peep! We're going into extra time!

Peep! And we're off again. Wrexham has replaced Morvan with Stringel in an attacking move.

92' A rugby scrum in front of the United goal results in no penalty despite a whole bunch of kicking, and United are able to clear it away.

96' Despite being down a man extra time has been all United so far.

98' A free kick leads to a corner leads to a throw in for Wrexham.

100' Cristobal Marchan is shown his second yellow for a tackle on Argenti and United are down to 9 men!

102' United looking to just hang on until penalties, hacking down Wrexham players left and right now

103' GOAL! Isaac Stringel slips it by Yeliseev! That has to be the winner!

105' Wrexham are 15 minutes from glory. Can United stop them?

106' Reed saves the day with a perfect sliding tackle on Collecott to prevent a potential 3 v 2 counter attack.

108' Goal! An own goal from Bawling and that should nail it shut for Wrexham! They're so close to the double!

111' Collecott trying to save United's chances, but he sends it wide. It's looking grim despite his heroic efforts.

114' United have been trying desperately to catch Wrexham out, forcing Reed and Laux to make interceptions.

117' Wrexham is having to defend furiously against United despite being 2 men up, and Mujkic earns a yellow card.

119' Wrexham are packing the box now, it's clear they're just looking to run out the clock and are bereft of ideas going forward. They can't even keep possession.

120' Only one minute of Fergie time coming up!

Peep! That's it! Wrexham are champions of the Premier League and of Europe! It may have taken them longer than they would have liked, but they did it! That injury to Boumsong and lack of available substitute will loom large in the retelling of this David vs. Goliath tale.

Post Match: That's as happy a bunch of players as I've seen in a long time, there's a dogpile in the center of the pitch. The stadium speakers are blaring Wrexham is the Name and the Wrexham faithful are full throatedly singing along.

Wrexham 5-3 Manchester United aet
Man of the Match: Steve Collecott

Watch goal highlights.