Part 188: Chapter the Seventh: New year, old faces.

Chapter the Seventh: New year, old faces.
January 6, 2026-February 2, 2026

Things might be a bit fuzzy in these coming updates, seeing as I played them two and a half months ago. Seeing as how you've read them a couple months ago, though, here's a quick update on where we stand.



Brony Hunter was just elected our Club President, giving us a local face to placate the rubes as we sell off hundreds of millions of pounds from the team and pocket them for our private use.



The board is also all for scouting out a foreign club we can cherry-pick youth from, hopefully a top flight Brazilian club will be interested.




We're alive in three out of four competitions, having been knocked out of the Capital One League Cup by Arsenal thanks to an assist by referee Howard Webb. We're a point back from United in the league, and facing off against Barca in the knockout round of the Champions League.





As it's the transfer window, I'm always on the hunt for places to give our future stars a chance to blossom rather than rot in our reserves.



I'm also always willing to sell off a star, even if that's the incomparable El Compadrito. Taborda is a great, great player... but he's a secondary piece and a clear second choice behind Meteor. Plus, the money is too good to turn down, we're a club that can just about break even with a megabastard payroll but can't play the big league transfer game without selling some of our lads made good.



I'm not crazy, though. Not even 69 million pounds can pry String away from Wales.

vs Queens Park Rangers, January 10, 2026
Premier League


The 4-4-2 Diamond seems to be paying dividends thus far, lets see how it does against QPR's staid, flat 4-4-2. I'm going to bet that it does well, we're at home and QPR is pretty terrible.

Starting Formation: 4-4-2 Vivace
Starting 11: Minami, Reed, Tounkara, Laux, Loseille, Maloney, Mercado, Mujkic (c), Shirra, Stringel, Thiago.
Subs: Kocsis, Cirjak, Hammatt, Enrique, Bailey, Allan.

Shirra scores early, and sets the pattern for a game in which we roll out an unwelcoming mat for our visitors by outshooting them 32 to 1. Thiago is clearly out to prove his worth to the world, tallying a hat trick by the 60th minute, and we roll to an easy victory.

Man of the Match: Thiago




Wrexham 4-0 QPR



Bologna's megarich owner finally finds another player willing to take his millions.

At Arsenal, January 14, 2026
Premier League


This is a big game, and I'm feeling cagey about it. We're going to be playing on the counter today, against one of the only teams I think can beat us. That goes double with Marco Valerio Cirelli having an excellent debut campaign for the North London side.

Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Counter
Starting 11: Minami, Cirjak, Hammatt, Laux, Loseille, Maloney, Shirra, Mercado, Stringel, Mujkic (c), Thiago.
Subs: Kocsis, Reed, Tounkara, Enrique, Ünsal, Bailey, Allan.

We sit back and let Arsenal spend all day with the ball, hoping to thwart their attacks while springing a surprise or two of our own. It works for most of the game, we have more and more dangerous shots than Arsenal, but they're finally able to break through first in the 73rd minute and then again in the 81st. United were playing away against City, hopefully they didn't pick up points on us.




Arsenal 2-0 Wrexham



So much for that hope. United sit seven points up on us, and that February 3rd date against them is looking more and more vital to our hopes.



During my monthly staff meeting it was pointed out that Stringel could use a bit of mentoring; for all his brilliance he's still only 22 years old. Thiago, for one, has no desire to be that mentor. Since I would rather place our striker inside a hermetically sealed box between matches than do anything that might disrupt his focus, I don't press the issue.



When Shirra also turns down the opportunity to mentor Stringel, I start to realize our budding superstar might be a bit of a prick. So I decide he's good enough already, and act as if that was the plan all along.

vs Tottenham Hotspur, January 18, 2026
Premier League


I'm not going to panic about the Arsenal loss, but failing to get right back on the beam would start to make the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. Tottenham is still Tottenham, though.

Starting Formation: 4-4-2 Vivace
Starting 11: Minami, Reed, Tounkara, Laux, Loseille, Enrique, Mercado, Mujkic (c), Shirra, Thiago, Stringel.
Subs: Kocsis, Cirjak, Hammatt, Maloney, Ünsal, Bailey, Allan.

Thank goodness for Spurs. Thiago scores early and late, while Mercado and Shirra add goals in between the Italian's brace, and we march past the other North London team to victory. Perhaps the lesson I should take from the Arsenal loss is to never play anything less than balls out attacking strategies.

Man of the Match: Thiago




Wrexham 4-0 Tottenham



You know what might help you heal quicker? Some companionship from an older and more mature teammate!



No offense, bosses, but these teams suck. Juventude is the only one with above average recruitment, and as such is my default recommendation.



Well how about that. Stoke still aren't going anywhere in the League, but if they win the League Cup they could fall to the Championship and still play in Europe next year. Sky Shadowing's Southampton also reaches the final, and has a very real hope for silverware.

At Stoke City, January 24, 2026
FA Cup, Fourth Round


Fresh off their victory in the League Cup, Stoke finds their path in the other cup blocked by significantly more formidable competition. They're definitely playing better in January, beating Swansea and Burnley in EPL play while topping Arsenal to get to this match, but we're still heavy favorites.

Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Kocsis, Cirjak, Tounkara, Hammatt, Enrique, Maloney, Bailey, Bale, Allan, Mujkic (c), Thiago.
Subs: Minami, Reed, Laux, Zouaghi, Mercado, Bouzid, Parr.

The goddamned Bat Man, 16-year-old Kristian Bale, scores by going near post on the Stoke keeper in the first minute, and any dreams of Potter glory are snuffed at the outset. Thiago adds insult and injury in the 10th and 25th minutes, while Callum Allan makes the most of a rare start to earn Man of the Match honors. Our path towards FA Cup glory looks clear, with only Manchester United remaining untoppled after the fourth round games end.

Man of the Match: Callum Allan.




Stoke 0-4 Wrexham



So much for the Bat Man, he's also given bereavement leave after his parents were murdered before his eyes by a deranged and upset Stoke fan.



Newcastle aren't even in the Premier League this season. If we don't make it to the quarterfinal round I'm going to be irate.



I'm expecting this game to be delayed until sometime in April, whereupon we'll play Chelsea four times in a row between the Champions League and the Premiership.

At Manchester City, January 27, 2026
Premier League


City are a step off of the best teams in the league this year, but a trip to their turf remains one of the biggest challenges we'll face this year. We need a win here to keep pace with Manchester United, who are threatening to reopen a big lead atop the table. I'm still too much of a wimp to have us come out attacking, though.

Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Counter
Starting 11: Minami, Reed, Tounkara, Laux, Loseille, Shirra, Ünsal, Parr, Allan, Mujkic (c), Thiago.
Subs: Kocsis, Cirjak, Hammatt, Maloney, Bailey, Mercado, Bouzid.

My wimpiness is validated, as our players strike early and often on the counter. Shahed Parr has us up 2-0 after the first half, and things don't get better for the home team after the break. Thiago continues to run rampant, scoring in the 55th minute, while Callum Allan and Matthias Laux tack on two in the waning moments of the game to give us a resounding 5-0 away win against the team in fourth place. All hail the counter, all my doubters have been proven frauds and charlatans!

Man of the Match: Shahed Parr




Man City 0-5 Wrexham

At Liverpool, January 31, 2026
Premier League


After a five-nil annihilation of a top four team how hard could a storied club playing their first season back in the top flight play us? This seems like a good chance to give regulars a rest before Götterdämmerung takes place in three days when Manchester United comes to Wales.

Starting Formation: 4-2-3-1 Control
Starting 11: Minami, Cirjak, Tounkara, Loseille, Maloney, Bailey (c), Mercado, Allan, Blyth, Thiago.
Subs: Kocsis, Enrique, Laux, Shirra, Brown, Mujkic, Parr.

The cardinal sin of Habeasdorkus, Football Manager, is pride. I watch our weakened squad fall behind by two goals and after the second the mocking songs roll down the stands from the Anfield faithful.We never once look comfortable before the whistle mercifully brings the first half to an end. I'm forced to bring in Parr and Meteor to try and salvage the game, and thankfully there's still plenty of time to do so. Thiago starts a riotous second half with a bonkers volley, and then Matias Mercado takes over the game for the next ten minutes.

First Mercado converts a penalty to tie things up. Then he makes an inch perfect tackle at midfield to set up a Parr goal as we take the lead. Then after a defensive lapse allows Liverpool to make it 3-all, he gets on the end of a Thiago free kick to restore our advantage. It's a classic Mercado performance, and gives us a victory despite having spotted Liverpool a two goal advantage.




Liverpool 3-4 Wrexham



The victory doesn't come without a cost. With Quiboulaz still out we have just two senior centerbacks, Laux and Tounkara, fit to play.




The transfer window closes without any club making major additions to their squad. Only £76m was spent by English clubs, and we sent a lot of talent overseas. Of course, England is home to the reigning Champions League titlists and they can't even sniff the top of the table when compared to the actual best clubs in the country, so perhaps we already own all the best players.





I'm happy with standing pat, especially as Thiago has continued to break all comers across his well muscled Brazilio-Italian thigh. He's guaranteed to set a new Premier League record for goals scored barring a tragic Lamborghini crash.



The loss to Arsenal cost us some ground on Manchester United, who slipped themselves by drawing against Tottenham at the end of January, but a victory on February 3rd will put us right back on their heels. Next month also sees us play a slightly easier schedule, with a trip to Barcelona the only stiff test we need concern ourselves. I'm not looking beyond that United game, though. It very well could determine the league, and whether this year can be a success regardless of our progress in the Champions League and FA Cup.