Part 215: Chapter the First: What is old shall be made new.

Chapter the First: What is old shall be made new.
July 5, 2027-August 10, 2027

We're at the top of the football world. We can go into basically any stadium and be favored over the local eleven. But we've done so by following the rules of the modern game, rather than forcing reality to succumb to our will. That all changes this year. We're bringing back the Pyramid. It was invented in Wrexham back in 1877, and over the next 100 years the game slowly twisted this noble creation completely about. The wingers dropped further and further back, and the back line bulged and grew as clubs were too cowardly to play with five up top.



The Pyramid was the first tactic to delineate an offensive and defensive unit on the field, with the midfielders and centerbacks playing deep while the five man front went to work on the opposition. As I've set things up we shouldn't suffer a suicidal, our wingers will have defensive responsibilities and essentially work as reverse fullbacks. I can't wait to see the looks on our opponent's faces when we come, and I will relish the gasps of terror and fear they make.



Don't all jump out of your seats in excitement, guys.



I'm going to wait until Meteor's closer to retirement before giving him a testimonial. He's still young and looks a long way from being finished as a potent force on the left wing.

It's too bad that the game won't let us give Bailey a testimonial, though. He'd be eligible for a testimonial if the game added up all his years of service instead of requiring 10 consecutive years with the club.



It was a mistake to re-sign Jefferies and we'd have saved money if we'd just let him walk. The best that can be said about him is that he'll make a decent striker for a team that's expected to have trouble staying up this season.



Arsenal was just taken private by the current owner a few years ago. Did the current owner run out of money? Or did AJ_Impy's efforts to sabotage the club actually have an effect?



I wanted Tackleford to be the first opponent at our new stadium, but they're too busy for us... the jerks. In retrospect I should have instead asked Chester to come by and gape at the majesty of our new stadium.



It's time to start blending our younger players into the squad. That means there's only going to be a handful of players going out on loan this season, guys who I feel certain are not yet ready for any first team time. There's four of them in total, and only one of them is on a full year loan.



The Pyramid's first dry run results in victory, but we required two late goals to win and PSV should have scored far more often than they did.



Of course, part of the reason we had such trouble was because our squad started the match exhausted, not one player had above a 90% condition. I've canceled our trip to Munich in an effort to get everyone back into shape.



It didn't take Noah Collignon long to break Ryan McLeod's transfer spending record.



I don't think the United States has been ranked this high since I started coaching.



I'm correct.



4-5 odds indicates we have a 56% chance to win the league. Which is way too high, considering that the Manchester United odds give them a 44% chance to win the league. The bookies must be really raising the line on us because punters won't stop betting that either us or United will win the league again.



This year we'll have to get by with a normal sized bonus pool. We could have had a large one, but I forgot to add more money to the transfer budget from our wage budget.



We played Köln as part of Malte Landgraf's transfer agreement. It was a mediocre performance, and another match we could have easily lost. The Pyramid still needs fine tuning before the season begins, obviously.



We can't even sell out the opening of our new stadium? I don't care that it's a friendly, that's not a great sign. Or maybe getting 37,000 tickets is a good sign, since the Mini-Cwp is after all just a friendly.



I need to decide what to offer Ikeda and Rickard in the next few months, as well as give contracts to Weeks, Cooke, and Davies.



Justin Bailey, on the other hand, has already agreed to a new deal complete with a pay cut.



Colwyn Bay outplayed us in the first 20 minutes, but we recovered and won handily while starting only six first team players. Also, only 14,689 people showed up. That's a far, far cry from the 37,000 expected.



I didn't use the Pyramid in this match, I was too invested in winning the Mini-Cwp. I feel ashamed.



But only a little ashamed. This is a fine addition to our other honors!



That's not how you get on my good side, youngster.



You are an 18-year-old from Wrexham who has no memories of anyone other than me running this club, and who came in for a calm note of disapproval after a match where you were lazy and complacent after coming on as a sub. I am the greatest coach of all time, and a legend in your hometown, beloved by one and all. Who do you think people are going to support when you go gerning like a baby to the media about how I'm so mean and tough on you?

Congratulations, kid. You just lost your chance at ever again putting on your hometown colors and representing the team. You can go enjoy playing for some mediocre lower division club, because you're no longer welcome in my town.



PSG doesn't seem to realize that I'm not interested in selling Quiboulaz anymore. They make a new offer every five days, even after I've ordered Paul Williams to just hang up on them each time they call.



It might just be because we were playing an off-brand version of the Chicago Fire, but this was a much better performance. We swarmed the opposition penalty area, and always had a man lurking to put away a rebound.



Our “Help Team USA” feeder finally comes in, and we're going with Partizan Belgrade. Not only do they have “Great” training and youth facilities, but their ultras are about as left-wing as you get in Serbia. I'll be making sure to send our loanees brass knuckles and gas masks around the time of each Partizan/Red Star derby.



The Cosmos play at Hofstra University in Football Manager, meaning that they're not even technically in New York City.



Time to sign a bunch of Americans!



I hate my country sometimes. This guy, David Hunt, has 3 star potential for Wrexham. He could become as big a star as Mateo Mujkic or Scott Shirra. But instead he's wasting away in Westchester county, New York, because he's goddamned draft protected. So he sits around never playing any matches while being trained by people who don't know the difference between a football fullback and a soccer fullback. No wonder we could never get out of the group stage.



No problem. I don't mind if someone else swoops in on these kids, the goal is to get them from horrible, podunk clubs where they won't improve to a place where they can grow as players.



Really? I guess you don't feel confident that you could make the jump to a European team at this point in your career. If that's the case, more power to you for knowing yourself and your limits.



One problem with playing the Pyramid is that it really stretches our attacking squad thin while leaving our fullbacks, who are some of our best players, on the bench. It's looking likely that I'll use the Pyramid in home matches against mid to lower table opposition. I'm going to try and use it once every three games, because at the very least the matches are less boring than when we play in a 4-2-3-1.



Hey, the new corporate digs are already paying off.



Arsenal have been wheeling and dealing this offseason, I wonder if the embargo will catch them short at any position.



Our first American arrives. Garcia would be one of the five best strikers in MLS, but of course they're idiots who can't tell talent from a hole in the wall. So we're shipping him off to Partizan once his work permit is denied, so that he can earn an honest living.



F&$@!



That fell apart quickly.



Paredes has 3 star potential, is only 19, and was sitting around unemployed in America. If I hadn't rescued him he might have ended up out of soccer because America is too stupid to understand when they have a potential wonderkid.



Goodbye, America. It was nice to be back, if only for a week. Even better, we avoided picking up any serious injuries over the course of our preseason.



None of the six Americans we're signing will get a work permit. But we still have to go through the appeals process nonetheless.



America's favorite carni-pescatarian is off to Turkey, for a much lower fee than I'd have guessed given his recent performances.



Teenagers are idiots whether in real life or Football Manager.



What did you think I was going to do, you twerp?

vs Swansea City, August 8, 2027
Premier League


We last lifted the Community Shield three years ago. This time we won't be playing a Manchester club for it, as we have every year since 2021. The squad below uses the best players we have for the Pyramid, so if it goes Hindenberg all over Wembley then it's a strong argument that I am over-proud and we might be headed for disaster.

Starting Formation: The Pyramid
Starting 11: Minami, Tounkara, Hammatt, Laux, Shirra, Zouaghi, Moctezuma, Stringel, Rickard, Thiago, Mujkic (c).
Subs: Kocsis, Quiboulaz, Allan, Damgaard, Bale, Rouissi, van Leeuwen.

The pressure is on Swansea from the start, but they're able to score on their first shot when Hammatt allows right winger Dejan Tomac to waltz right by him. After half an hour the Swans still lead, largely due to our offensive impotence. We've earned six corners and created seven chances, but failed to make Swansea pay. Fifteen minutes later sees more of the same, and we're outshooting our opponent 20-to-1, but still losing.

The second half starts much the same as the first, with the opposition bunkered down and under heavy fire. Given the sheer number of shots we've had there's no way we could be held goalless forever, and Thiago makes it one-all in the 52nd minute. Five minutes later and Stringel has added a second, and the relief radiates off the Wrexham fans present. When Moctezuma clinches the game with an 81st minute goal, everyone knew that it was coming. As the referee raises his whistle to call the game to a close Mateo Mujkic emphatically finishes things off with a volley from twenty yards out. It's a dominant debut for the Pyramid, and we treated a club that won the FA Cup last season like a chew toy.

Man of the Match: Rodrigo Moctezuma




Wrexham 4-1 Swansea



That thing's bigger than I realized. It's actually the size of a shield instead of a dinner plate.



Rickard scored 21 goals last season in the Championship. I'd say he's earned a chance to crack the top level.



Shahed Parr finds a new club with ease, signing on for Reading and AJ_Impy. If he's healthy he'll be one of their best players.



Our six Americans have arrived. Garcia is the most well developed but has the lowest ceiling of the bunch. I signed him because he needed a job and couldn't find one despite scoring a dozen goals in each of the last three MLS seasons.



Casey Medina is 18 and raw as hell. But he's got “good Premier League central midfielder” potential, and he has three years in which to develop before the next World Cup.




Braun and Brown are two more players with “good Premier League” potential, Braun at right wing and Brown in center midfield. The problem for them is that right now they're only League Two quality players, and will have to improve dramatically if they're going to reach that relatively high potential.



I mentioned Paredes earlier, and he's the one that might have a future with Wrexham as well as with the USMNT. He could develop into a “star Premier League” right midfielder and at the age of 19 would be one of the best players on most Championship clubs. If he fulfills his potential he's going to be sharing time with his countryman Rodrigo Moctezuma in our lineup.



Christian Lopez is the final American I'm bringing in. He's nothing special, another kid with “good Premier League” player as his highest potential, but he does play on the left side of the pitch. That's important as right now there are only a couple of American players who can play on the left, and it's not ideal if we're forced to toss a right winger over there instead.



Any offseason where we don't lose a match while practicing an archaic formation that hasn't been used since shortly after World War Two is a good one. We won the Community Shield in commanding fashion. We've got a throwback style, and now we need to prove it can work when it counts. If it does, then all will acknowledge me as the greatest manager of all time.



Prediction Contest

Predict: How many matches will we play with Pyramid across all competitions (partial games count).
Tiebreaker 1: What will be our goal differential those matches?
Tiebreaker 2: How many goals will we score per game while in the Pyramid?

Predictions will be open until 12pm EST on Wednesday.

Also, we still need a name for the stadium, right now we've got the following suggestions:
Dragon's Den
Castell Coch
The Red Keep (2 votes)
The God King's Playground/Court (2 votes)

Regardless of what we pick you can expect me to append "at the Racecourse Grounds" on the end of it.