Part 24: Chapter the Ninth: Filling holes.
Chapter the Ninth: Filling holes.January 1, 2015-February 1, 2015
Time to commoditize human beings by buying and selling players like cattle at the market! We've got until 12am on February 1st to remake the team.
So remember when I sold Stamp and said “I hope this doesn't come back to bite me in the ass?” Yeah.
And just to add some salt to the wound, Duchamps wins the young player award. Stop tormenting me with my old players, arbitrary and cruel Soccer God.
New contracts for everyone! Well, everyone I'm sure I want to keep. They get deals with raises of £100-150/wk and a 1-2 year extension.
We've got £8,000 in wage budget room to play with, and £15.5k in transfer funds to start the window. It's going to mean a lot of bargain hunting, at least until after the FA Cup match in a couple days.
Right after the start of the window FC Halifax approaches me about Damian King. I guess they hadn't looked at our depth chart and seen that King was one of only three centerbacks on the squad. And since they're not even offering a penny for him, I am not at all interested. Go find another central defender, Halifax Town!
The board is displeased with our performance last month in the league. Otherwise, though, things are going pretty well.
When I told you to find another defender, Halifax, I didn't mean mine! Git!
Norwich has several very good players on their Under-21 side. I make loan offers for White, Flanagan, and Underwood which are accepted. They should all help a lot and be on board in the next week or so.
Hey, that's not supposed to happen! He doesn't think we're good enough to be worth playing at.
This is our balance sheet right before the Manchester United game. We're about £37k in the red at the moment, and relying on a bank loan to make payroll.
Excellent, a max capacity crowd. Thank you for coming today to watch our humble team. Don't mind me while I sing “Master of the House” while picking your pockets.
At Manchester United, January 3, 2015
FA Cup, 3rd Round
Winning this game was never in the cards. I don't even play our best lineup, as I'd rather give some of our less fit players time to rest. I'm unsurprised that we fall into a four goal deficit before the first half is even over, and I'm only hoping that we can keep the scoreline respectable. We do, scoring two goals of our own before allowing a final Manchester United goal in stoppage time of the second half. The game wasn't exciting, but we got paid and we didn't embarrass ourselves.
Manchester United 5-2 Wrexham
Check it out. We earned £1.3m pounds from that one game. We had to pay over £200k in taxes, but we're now the second wealthiest Skrill Premier team behind Tackleford City. I asked you, the Board, to increase our transfer budget by £100,000 and our wage budget by £3,000/wk, and you agreed. This significantly helps me in my efforts to strengthen the team.
Oh come on. What's the point of having a parent team if they won't make their players come to us?
First attempt to find a centerback, failed. He wanted way more money than I was willing to pay.
At Ebbsfleet, January 6, 2015
Skrill Premier
We're lucky to get away with a draw here, we only score via an own goal and give 17th place Ebbsfleet plenty of chances. We're playing our best squad, too, which means that it's not because I wasn't taking the game seriously enough. We've been pretty dismal against bottom of the table squads, with two points from three games against teams ranked 15th, 17th, and 21st since November 25th.
Ebbsfleet 1-1 Wrexham
Carroll hasn't gotten into a single game for us. It's about time that he hang up his boots. Maybe I'll give him a final game in the FA Trophy, or a cameo in a match we have well in hand.
Second attempt to find a centerback, failed. He fell for the allure of a first team role at a League Two side at £475/wk instead of a first team role here for double that. Damnit.
I hope running to the bloggers about reserve squad players in Leagues One and Two transferring to the Skrill Premier makes you feel like big men, leakers.
vs. Braintree, January 10, 2015
FA Trophy, 3rd Round
We should have won this game handily. Braintree's goals came from a shot 30 yards out and on a wicked free kick from outside of the area. We had more chances, and we had more possession in their area, and we simply failed to do anything with it. Even our one goal came on an own goal by a Braintree defender trying to clear the ball. You can call us unlucky to lose this match, buy it doesn't change the fact that we simply failed to take our chances.
Wrexham 1-2 Braintree
This left back thinks I'm not offering him enough money even though he'd be getting a significant raise. I might come back to him before the end of the window, he's pretty good. Or I might go with one of the two or three other players who are equally as good and not as snooty about slumming it in our league.
My efforts to winkle teenagers from out underneath the noses of other teams continues to not pay off.
Hey! We got one! I paid a whopping £1,000 for him, and I'm not sure how my scouts even knew about him seeing as he was playing semi-pro soccer in Orlando Florida at the time.
Daniel Clarke
Central Midfielder
Clarke's immediately one of our best players, and will be able to cover for Justin Bailey until he's back from his wrist injury. He's probably not going to get much better, but he'd be useful for a lower table League One team, so he doesn't have to improve to help us.
Vs. Nuneaton, January 13, 2015
Skrill Premier
Clarke's just arrived and it's time to see how he performs in his first match. Nuneaton is another lower table side, in 19th place at the start of the day. Our Dragons start off with some serious fire in their bellies. In the 10th minute O'Hanlon makes like Roberto Carlos on a brilliant free kick. Then just minutes later our new signing, Daniel Clarke, adds a goal from a corner to push us up two-nil. Clarke continues his dream debut when his own rebound falls before him and he punches it into the net.
When I substitute for Clarke, his lack of match fitness won't let him play a full 90 yet, he gets a standing ovation. Nuneaton is able to scratch a consolation goal at the death when Nsangou fails to make an easy save, but we bossed the field for the entire match.
Wrexham 3-1 Nuneaton
Our old dudes are dropping like flies.
Tommy McGuinness
Central Midfielder
Tommy comes over from Southend United, a League Two side, on a free transfer. He's not as good as Clarke, but he has a lot of versatility, isn't that expensive, and gives us an additional rotation option. He's also one hell of a leader, and once he gels with the squad will be getting the armband whenever one of our captains aren't on the pitch.
Crap. He's going to get injections, we're too thin in the back to go without him.
Huh, I wonder why he likes Wrexham so much?
That explains it. Bah was transferred from Wrexham to Crewe before the start of the 2013-2014 season. That transfer had a 20% sell on clause that required Crewe to pay Wrexham 20% of any future transfer fee they got. So, essentially, we got a 20% discount.
Ibrahima Bah
Striker
Bah is perfect for the same role Cannon plays, we can swap them in depending on who's on a good run of form. He's big, strong, and should be excellent at link up play. I'd like to see better composure on his part, but then we were already only able to sign him because he loves playing for Wrexham.
With two weeks left in the transfer window we've got £6.5k/wk before we hit our wage cap, and we still need to find a left back and a centerback. They'll probably cost about £2.5k/wk between them, unless I can find loaners. The rest of the wage budget will be saved for seducing hot young things when school lets out in March. We've also got almost all of our transfer budget left, which will be husbanded carefully.
This is a common sight. Tackleford is throwing their financial weight around.
Yep, we're big pimping, spending g's. All four of them. In reality, Wrexham's record transfer is £212,000 to Liverpool all the way back in 1978 for Joey Jones, back when that was a lot of money for a transfer.
At Wycombe, January 16, 2015
Skrill Premier
The Wanderers have only given up 16 goals in 27 league games. Our offense matches up favorably with Wycombe, but our defense has been far more porous. Their defense remains stout, we simply can't get a goal across. Luckily, ours is as well, and we at least take a point from the fixture. We sit eight points back from the playoffs with seventeen matches left to play.
Wycombe 0-0 Wrexham
Crap. I really need to bring in that additional centerback.
Femi Don-Duncan
Left Back
Don-Duncan is basically a more defensively adequate, slower version of Daniel Thomas. He comes to us for free after failing to break in at League One Tranmere, and is very affordable. He and Thomas will be our primary tandem at left back, though I'm hoping one of them develops into a better defender. At the very least he fits with our bombs away strategy.
Stuart Martin
Centerback
Martin is both our highest transfer fee at £9,000, and has a salary of almost double our next highest player. But since we got a deal on Don-Duncan it's acceptable, especially seeing as Tierney and King are getting long in the tooth. Martin is the type of centerback who's best at hanging back and playing very defensively, which also fits with our bombs away strategy.
We've brought in five players for a total of £15,000, and we still have £4,000 a week available in our wage budget. A good transfer window, and there's still ten days left! Unless some one remarkable shows up, we're done buying players. I'll also look around for players to loan out, but I'm pleased with how things have gone over the last twenty days. My only complaint is that we weren't able to offload any of our deadweight. Most of those contracts will be up at the end of the year, but it's a pity we can't save more money by getting rid of them earlier.
I extended Reynolds for the rest of the year. He's been pretty good as a defensive midfielder and I am all about having a deep squad.
I also loan Pearson from Port Vale at 20% of his salary, or £100/wk. He'll give us cover at centerback, which is important since Holtham has been, until now, our only acceptable backup. He won't be with the team longer than the rest of the season, and is fourth on the depth chart behind Tierney, King, and Martin. That leaves us with two more long term loans available for the season.
At Grimsby, January 24, 2015
Skrill Premier
Grimsby is in first place, with 60 points on the season through just 29 games. This will be a tough ask for us, but we appear up to it when we jump out to a lead in the first two minutes. Nothing else happens in the first half as the defenses stymie each other. We fail to take a two goal lead right after the half when our new signing Bah blows an easy shot. Grimsby's striker draws a second yellow card shortly after, and we're a man up for forty minutes. Bah doubles our advantage in the 64th minute, and the stewards struggle to hold back our fans. Grimsby, despite having only 10 men, makes the last half hour hairy, but at the end of the day we take away a victory. We've taken down the league leaders in their own house.
Grimsby 0-2 Wrexham
The game seems to think I'm willing to get rid of my centerbacks for some reason. I guess the AI doesn't realize that I'm not going to trade away one of my best defenders for nothing.
vs. Hyde, January 27, 2015
Skrill Premier
Hyde is in last place, having won five, drawn five, and lost twenty. They turtle, and we can't break them down in the first half. The frustration continues into the second half, until Darren Baker finally breaks through just four minutes from regulation time. The scoreline is closer than it should be, we had thirteen shots to their one, but a win is a win. Femi Don-Duncan wins player of the match in his debut, but that doesn't keep me from chastening the locker room after the game for failing to meet expectations. We're six back of the promotion playoffs in ninth place, and certainly in the hunt. We're ten back of the league leaders, and while we'd have to pass eight other teams to reach the top it's not impossible should our recent additions mesh easily with the team.
Wrexham 1-0 Hyde
Ok, fine, I'm sick of dealing with your moping.
Our final addition of the transfer window is Liam Franks from Leeds. Despite only paying 20% of his wages we're still giving him £1,900 a week, and I expect some real fireworks from him. He's worthless on defense and in the air, but his crossing and his flair should help us take advantage of Cannon and Bah's abilities as target men.
Being able to break the offside trap is an important learned ability for any attacking player. To acquire it the player needs good pace and acceleration as well as strong off the ball and concentration stats. It will result in more surging runs past the defense and fewer offsides calls against them.
Bah, what's so special about that? They're only two points ahead of us on the table.
We start February having recovered from the brief slump of December. We cannot afford to lose many more games, but we're well placed after the transfer window to reach the promotion playoff. With good health and some luck we should be playing for entry into the Football League come May.
BOARD REQUEST(Assertively) I'd like to request permission to hire additional scouts to improve not only our knowledge of players, but our ability to rapidly process scouting requests when the March youth intakes occur.
(Passionately) I am certain that signing young players with high potential is key to our success as a club.
(Calmly)We currently have three scouts. Each scout costs roughly £350/wk, in addition to roughly £200 a month in scouting expenses. I have prepared three options for the board.
A) No new scouts, our current staff is sufficient and the additional expense is unwarranted. (no expense change)
B) Two new scouts, our current staff is insufficient but the increase should be limited in order to maintain a healthy financial standing. (increase in expenses of approximately £3,200 a month)
C) Four new scouts, our current staff is woefully insufficient and we need to improve this area if we are to rise to new heights. (increase in expenses of approximately £6,500 a month)
Board bylaws require a compromise should there be no absolute majority. e.g. Should the voting be split 33%/33%/33% the board will allow two additional scouts. Should the voting split 20%/40%/40%, the board will allow three new scouts. Should the voting split 55%/0%/45% the board will allow zero new scouts. Etc.
To help inform you prior to your decision the club's accountants have compiled the following financial numbers.
These are our expenses from the past month. Salaries should stay roughly steady, but we are unlikely to have any tax payments. Over 98% of our tax payments are a result of the FA Cup match in Manchester. Ergo, we are spending approximately £233,000 a month.
Last month's income figures are highly atypical, and as such I have included this and last season's income figures as well. Removing the outlier FA Cup income, we make approximately £300,000 a month when including pro-rated club fundraising and season ticket income, which are lump sum totals that arrive in the summer of each year. Absent those pro-rated amounts we bring in £189,000 a month, for a monthly reduction in our balance of £44,000.
Our current bank balance is £850,000. We are on course to make a profit of £929,000 this year, compared with a loss of £253,000 last year.
Voting will close at 5pm, Sunday, December 29th, 2014.