Part 48

EPILOGUE



The Baid-Rowel bandits are still at large in Kukubia, and will be for the foreseeable future. However, the few that attacked Slev, Tark'la & Sons had their comeuppance when they attempted to rob Captain Leahy. Having awakened the wrath of the ex-pirate, they found themselves on the losing end of a dogfight.

Their escape pods were later rounded up, one by one, by the Galaxy Police.



The broker's marriage ultimately dissolved when her husband left to pursue his newfound asceticism full-time. She was all too happy to be single again, and ensured that the door hit him on the way out.

Purple, large-toothed, professional female seeks attractive male with strong upward trend. Emotional attachment optional.



[This entry was in violation of His Imperial Majesty's ban on mentally scarring material, and has been removed.]



Captain Leahy returned to the pirate's life after suffering an attack from the infamous Baid-Rowel clan. He now targets bandits and smugglers exclusively, and has become something of a folk hero in Kukubia.

He has not looked back since.



There are a few less underprivileged youths in Kukubia today, thanks to the donation of Slev, Tark'la & Sons. Limpus made good on his promise, and was sure to tell each and every child of their benefactors.

Some months afterwards, a survey was conducted across Kukubian schools, which asked the children what they wanted to do when they grew up. Among the would-be bounty hunters and explorers, one pupil picked up her pencil and wrote, without hesitation:

"i want to work at slev tarkla an suns"



After years of loyal service, the so-called "L-Tech guy" made the jump from sales rep to manager. He now has the authority to order difficult customers to leave the premises. Sweet, intoxicating authority.

The factory's sales have since dropped by 90%.



In spite of his dire predictions, the Imperial Magistrate never did end up shooting anyone, not even himself. With the improvement of Kukubia's economy, requests for lower taxes gradually petered out.

He still keeps the gun, though. Just in case.



Slev and Tark'la continued to patronise their "favourite mechanic" for many years. Although they could never get quite what they wanted from him at any given time, his upgrades always turned out worthwhile in the end.

He later suffered liver failure at the hands of his mistress. Luckily, he had a spare.



Nibble began to have doubts about his role as Mr. Zinn's enforcer, brought on by Slev's stern reprimand. He expressed these doubts to his employer, who promptly erased them with an offer of more money.

On the positive side, he now tries to be gentle when breaking someone's kneecaps.



RJ Raffety made some chilli.

It was pretty good.



In time, Scooter Jay grew disgusted over having to smuggle to make a living. He became part of a galactic campaign, the goal of which was to restore friendly relations between Kukubia and Pata Pata Pita.

Together, they face a very stubborn emperor with a very long memory. Only time will tell if they succeed.



Lady Shimmer's private rendezvous with Emperor Dred sparked a great deal of rumour and controversy. A media storm began to brew, and Shimmer decided to make a temporary withdrawal from the public eye. Consequently, her scheduled performance was cancelled.

Tark'la eventually managed to talk Slev down from the rooftop.



Speevak's larvae are maturing splendidly. In honour of a certain two merchants, there is now a little space fly named "Slev", and a little space fly named "Tark'la".

Due to a slight misunderstanding, there is also a little space fly named "Sons."



Stubbs was persuaded by friends and family to join Aquaholics Anonymous, where he had certain things explained to him about his "addiction".

He no longer suffers from chronic dehydration. Slowly but surely, he is becoming a productive member of society.



The life of a freelancer is a difficult one. Soon after meeting Slev and Tark'la, Teeter was forced to settle on Xeen, where he opened a garage of his own in a last-ditch effort to make ends meet.

Fortunately, L-Tech's sudden decline caused an upsurge of demand for Teeter's engine enhancements. He is now one of the planet's most sought-after mechanics.



Upon hearing the news of Slev, Tark'la & Sons' accomplishment, Mr. Zinn smiled, raised his glass of brandy, and quietly filed the company under "No further business."

He knew that their success would be an inspiration to aspiring business owners everywhere. Thousands of young hopefuls. Up and coming entrepreneurs. People who need a little kickstart. Off the record.

Mr. Zinn is always ready to lend a webbed hand. Just make sure you have gratitude to spare.





Gizzy and Roke's Circus was a total flop. For one reason or another, the idea of a Kukubian freak show never caught on. Mr. Gizzy was undeterred, however, and the two went on to start a pizzeria, a spa, a lingerie store, a wrestling federation, and many other enterprises too numerous to list.

They currently run a tiki bar on Loro. God only knows how long it will last, or what will come next.



In a galaxy of advanced synthetic fabrics and wildly shifting fashion trends, "Vandergriff's Woollens" had a niche market at best. Nevertheless, some Kukubians saw a certain rustic appeal in the garments, and the store enjoyed modest success. Combined with substantial savings after liquidating his company's assets, Mr. Vandergriff was able to live quite comfortably.

Mr. Puffer found himself much more content working small-time. Where once he was apathetic towards his career, he now throws his heart and soul into every working hour. He remains Vandergriff's most valued employee, though he still can't manage a decent plaited stitch.







Hey Slev! Come here. I wanna show you something.
Yes?



Look at this burger. Do you see it?
...didn't you already do this-
Do you see it?
Yes. I see it.
Right. Do you know what this burger represents?
Us?
No. It represents the past. Now look outside.



That's the future.
Inspiring.
How long have you been waiting to use it?
Pretty much from day one.



It doesn't stop here, you know. Sure, we're millionaires, great great. So are lots of people. If we're really gonna shake up Gogg, we have to aim higher than "millionaires".
Billionaires, then.
Higher than that.
Trillionaires?
Higher.
...is there a certain figure you're looking for here?
Never mind.
Sirs? I had a dream last night.
Oh yeah?
Yes, sir. It was about marshmallows, sir.
Marshmallows, huh.
Yes, sir. And rabbits, sir. But mostly marshmallows.
That's nice.
I just thought you should know, sirs.



Arf! Arf!
Your turn to feed him.
Yeah yeah.