Part 16: The ice basement; a natural progression of the ice house

I'm running on a Core 2 Duo with four gigs of ram and an 8800 and my game STILL does this time to time. Near as I can tell it's just the fault of the engine.

Update #15: The ice basement; a natural progression of the ice house

We've brokered an agreement with the walking dragon-esque...things. Now we just need to see about clearing out the rest of this silly fortress.


I won't mind being finished with this dreadful place. Awful cold spot to catch a nap, y'know.
You are NOT allowed to complain about being cold, Mr. Robes-'n-fire.
It's hardly MY fault that the "fairer sex" has such a hard time comprehending pants.
The mini-shorts DO look good on you though, Clobby.
Dudes...why are we here again? I lost my head a bit.
To convince the three ice priestesses to let us fly through the western pass.
Convince, HA! None of you little girls can convince as well as Urggzob's axe!

We make a brief stop by the library to pilfer some scrolls before moving on.


I appreciate finally having some reading material, but I have to wonder why they though having a library in an ICE FORTRESS was a good idea.
Things keep better in the cold, silly!
...that's food, Pip, not books.



Well, down we go, chaps.
Who wants to bet that we're jumped right at the bottom of the stairs, before we can get back into formation?
I'm not taking that bet. Stairs and doors around here are ridiculous like that.
Urggzob does not mind being jumped! He has enough crush for EVERYONE!
I don't mind being jumped either.
Come on, Pip. There's images we could ALL do without.



Wait for it...



...Odd. Well, I guess we'll just have to take the hurt to the rabble, yes?
Yeaaarh! Urggzob is like a rabble-rouser, except instead of rousing rabble he crushes it!
A rabble-crusher?
There you go. You've said the word "rabble" so much it's lost any meaning.


At any rate, Urggzob finds his violent encounter just a room away.


All the same, all the same! Give Urggzob some challenge, little girls!



I imagine keeping this many bears in an underground ice fort is...troublesome.
I like bears. And flowers.
See, I bet flowers are even tougher to raise in the ice.
What else are these people doing with their time, seriously? It's as though they just wait for us to show up and destroy them.
I've got it! They could train the bears to raise the flowers!
What the hell, Pip?


Much killing later, Urggzob bursts into this random guy's room.


Ha-ha-haaa! Time for CRUSH, old man!



Urggy? What just happened?
Urggzob is not sure. Old man told Urggzob some weird stories and then said Urggzob owed him a favor.
Urggzob, come on. You of all people know that wizards aren't to be trusted.
*sigh*
Chin up, man. Can't let some half-naked woman bring you down like that.



I'm alright, really. They've got lots of books, and I've had nothing to read since the boat ride from Luskan.


We continue to explore the lower levels, finding lots of cultists in our way, and lots of winding, pointless passages.


Hey, Pip?
Yeah, Marty?
How come we've never seen you with your hood down?
Ugh. When was the last time ANY of you saw a decent bath house?
Back in Luskan, I'd say.
Exactly. My hair is simply dreadful right now.
It can't be that bad.
Honey, you're still wearing those rag-robes. I'm hardly about to listen to you for fashion advice.



Ooh, trippy. A hall of mirrors!
Not so much, Marty. Those're people trapped inside a pocket dimension INSIDE the mirror.
So how do we get 'em out?
Theoretically breaking the control mirror would do it, but I--
Urggzob is way ahead of you.


...they look angry.
Truly so. Best fireball 'em.





SO much death! Well done, fire man!
Thank you, thank you. Applause can wait until the conclusion.



Much better. Continue to laud me with your adoration.
I have a much more fun idea. Vomiting.
Eww, dear, no. There's much better ways to lose some weight.
Much as I hate to interrupt, there's some good gear here.



Ooh, neat!
Clobberella, why don't you take this one? I'm sure Marty's tired of casting Cure Light Wounds to heal your frost-bitten legs.
THANK THE GODS.



Mine now.
But it's not even enchan--
Hardly the point. It LOOKS good, and it's plenty useful besides. You're just wanting to get out of those rags, aren't you?
_{A little bit.}


Before, and after:


MUCH better. High collar, plenty of pockets...
Wheee, you've got a cape!


Moving on, we encounter a room full of coffins. And shadows.


A momentous day! Urggzob can now crush the very shadows themselves!
So what's your next crushing goal?
The sun.



Soo...this coffin is actually a doorway into a hall we've already explored?
Looks like it.
This fort has the crappiest damn secret passages, I swear.



Hey, these coffins have names on 'em.
Indeed they do. We've already done for two of them, but where's this "Oria"...?
Do not worry! Urggzob is coming for her.
That was surprisingly menacing.



...okay, I give up. Kruskrak, what's this room all about?
Good question. Presumably some form of entertainment or diversion.
Ooh, fun! Can I play?
Bother that. We've a priestess to find.
I'm sure it's nothing important, and we definitely won't be coming back here anyhow.

As we head north...


OH HIGH HEAVENS! FIRE EVERYWHERE!
...okay, I'll admit that it is pretty damn funny when it's happening to someone else.
I knew you'd come around. Sadly, I'm not responsible for this one.



Battle square...? Oh my. I bet this is that game room we saw earlier.
Whee!
Ha! Urggzob will battle as many squares as it takes!



And so...battle square madness!

Next Update!