Introduction
BLANKET NSFW WARNING. PRETTY MUCH ANY GIVEN MOMENT IN THIS GAME MIGHT GET YOU IN TROUBLE AT WORK, OKAY?
Lollipop Chainsaw is a Suda 51 game where you play as a barely legal teenage girl named Juliet who runs around in a cheerleader outfit and--
Please stop looking at me like that.
Anyway, you run around and you kill zombies with a chainsaw. All in all I'd say this is probably one of Suda 51's more normal and straightforward works. Even so, the game is amazingly fun and has some of the best boss fights in Suda's career, and considering No More Heroes was basically "cool boss fights, the game", that's saying something. Even the worst boss fight of the game still manages to be incredibly fun and memorable, and I love 'em.
I'll be doing two runs of the game. The first is a more casual look at the game on Normal difficulty, taking my time and showing off the story in all its' glory, and likely being really awful at it because I'm too used to playing it with all the moves and character upgrades and stuff. My scores will likely be awful and to reflect the fact that I'm actually pretty good at this game, the second run will be a score run. Every family member of Juliet's (except her mom) has a score in the level, and your dad has the highest ones. I'll be doing Dad Attack runs for each level on Hard difficulty, and during the Dad Attack runs I'll be taking the chance to show some more of the ridiculous and... "questionable" skins.
The game also has some really amazing music, though not all of it is on the soundtrack, so I'll be linking any songs I can manage to find. Especially the boss tracks, which are ALL amazing. Seriously, there's not a single bad boss or a single bad boss song.
Yes, there is a Very Hard difficulty. No, I won't show it off, Very Hard is awful and the antithesis of fun.
As usual, Ape will be with me the entire way. However, since this would make us feel very uncomfortable after a while, after the first video, I'll be bringing in guest commentators. A lot of them have barely seen anything from this game, so it'll be fun seeing how they react to how crazy this game is.
Youtube link where my guests and I blab over cutscenes if you want to hear us talk about dumb things while the game is being a different kind of crazy from the gameplay.
Youtube link where I shut up the commentary during cutscenes and dialouge I deem important/ funny enough to silence us over.
You can download the source video from Vifs' site in high definition and swap between the cut and uncut videos at any time (thank you for letting me mooch off your site vifs).
Nidoking was kind enough to show off the Ash costume and moves I don't really use much/ at all. What a cool dude.
Characters
The Good
Our main character, Juliet is an 18 year old cheerleader lollipop addict who, in her free time, kills zombies with a giant-ass chainsaw. It's also hard to forget that she's smarter than she leads on.
The boyfriend of our main character. He was going to meet Juliet's family today, but then he got bit by a zombie, which reportedly "sucks balls". Juliet saved him by cutting off his head and casting a magic spell to reanimate it.
Sushi chef. Zombie hunter. Pervert. Morikawa is the man who taught Juliet many skills necessary to survive, such as chainsaw usage, pole and lap dancing, and which underwear to put on when fighting zombies. Unfortunately he bit the dust, but at least he explained what's going on before he died.
Cordelia is Juliet's older sister. She's a crack shot with a sniper rifle and... uh... Okay, I'm gonna be honest here, Cordelia's probably the least developed member of Juliet's family. And Juliet's mom doesn't even show up.
Rosalind is a hyperactive, foul-mouthed, bus-driving maniac teenager who can't shut up. I really wish she would sometimes.
Dad's the god-dang best character in this whole game, and if you don't agree then your opinions are wrong.
The Bad
If Johnen Vasquez and Tim Burton got in a relationship and adopted a baby, Swan would be the result. He's summoned the Dark Purveyors to destroy the world because he got picked on in school.
An undead punk demigod who's favorite form of attacking is swearing so hard that physical words form and fly at you. Also, voiced by Jimmy Urine.
A sweedish death metal zombie viking with a pet bear and some anger issues. In dire need of some hair conditioner.
Mariska is a psychadellic zombie demigod who's superpower is to split in half multiple times. Her other power is being the most boring of the bosses.
Oh no. No no no. I am not spoiling ANYTHING about this magnificent beast. You watch the video, dammit.
All I'm saying is this undead rock star demigod is my favorite boss and you have to watch the video to find out why.
Giant, fat, evil, undead Elvis god. Yeup.
The Ugly
George was a childhood friend of Nick's; unknown to anoyone but himself, his mother and his doctor, he was born with three testes.
Jerry played drums in a Chumbawamba tribute band on weekends, unreasonably thinking that would someday make him a household name.
Fitzgibbon was everyone's favorite algebra teacher at San Romero High; he liked to attend Furry conventions in his downtime, and loved a good "furpile".
Officer Ryu got an erection every time he gave a pretty woman a speeding ticket.
Officer Stephanie sometimes used her nightstick to pleasure herself to yearbook photos of her old San Romero classmate, Gideon Starling.
Alexander was called "Mr. Awesome" by his friends for being a super nice guy, for his amazing six pack abs, and for the incredible blowjobs he gave his buddies.
Danielle once had a pork chop stuck between her flabs of fat for over six months.
Paul did a photo shoot for San Romero's Hunky Firefighters 2012 calendar in jean short shorts, but many of the photos were ruined because of a testicle dangling out.
Mark once photoshopped Juliet Starling's head onto the body of Miss April 2008.
Chat was considered an idiot, even by the other chickens.
Wesley was from a poor family so he made his own parachute pants out of garbage bags hoping no one would notice.
Mikaela once choreographed an hour-long dance routine to Pink Floyd's The Wall, alone, in front of her mirror.
Juan only loved one thing more than basketball: Dirty Sanchezes.
Roberta once flunked a student for being a ginger.
Jay had a birthmark removed by a dermatologist three years ago, and kept it in his back pocket ever after.
Uwe thought he invented the phrase "amazeballs" and got mad whenever anyone used it without crediting him.
Josephine was jealous of Juliet for being made team captain on the cheerleading squad, so she once made her a batch of chocolate chip cookies filled with laxatives.
Steven, San Romero's star first baseman, once ate part of a fetal pig in biology class, because he "loved pork", and it burnt out part of his esophagus.
Anastasia claimed she had a spiritual connection with actor Seth Green, and she was once arrested for breaking into his house and playing with his "Star Wars" action figures.
Tobe once stabbed his mother in the thigh with a sharpened pencil when she forgot to DVR an episode of "Game of Thrones" for him.
Lucid once cried when he found out that Slayer weren't actual Satanists.
Bill was once punched in the face for using the phrase "Too Cool for School" one too many times.
Christina got drunk one night and had the "High School Musical" logo tattooed onto her ass.
Peter was a youth minister at San Romero Baptist Church; his favorite movie was "The Toxic Avenger Part III: The Last Temptation of Toxie", which he called a "parable" and made it required watching for his Sunday Bible study group.
Brett believed in UFOS, Bigfoot, and 9-11 conspiracy theories; he also believed Keebler Elves were controlling his thoughts with little levers inside of his brain.
Samantha always thought fast running zombies were stupid (until she became one).
David was old and wise and a complete and utter dick.
Marie kept her virginity until she was married, but had "backdoor" sex with over three hundred sailors back in the day.
Jack was drunk for a full four years before becoming a zombie.
Concept Art
Music
