Part 23
I just find it ironic that he runs lufia.net, a fucking site dedicated to Lufia, and he sucks ass at it.Scalding Coffee posted:
I see nothing wrong with getting a very powerful bow to use against the final bosses. The extra defense from shields are always helpful in this game.
That guy who wishes for extra levels must have been dropped on his head as a baby.
So freaking huge, gigantic update today, I was bored so I played for three hours. Plus I have enough records to listen to to keep me content for a long time. YES I STILL LISTEN TO RECORDS. I have lots of awesome ones, like Bad Religion's Recipe for Hate, a couple Misfits albums, Crass's The Feeding of the 5000 and Christ the Album, Iron Maiden's KILLERS, Foreigner's Records, The Best of Heart, Boston, and Rancid's . . . And Out Come the Wolves. So I'll be fine, even if this update takes a while.
Let's see, we were on our way to getting Power Oil, weren't we? Here's the eddy:
I was going to post more wacky pictures of other things named Eddy, but all I could think of was Eddie Bauer and that isn't funny!
They stab you with their barbs to cause instant death
But seriously, they can barbwhip you or something to paralyze. Generic Sea monsters ahoy!I fought a ton of Hydras down here (they were really common), but no Might Sword
I mean, I might come here to grind for one before the final battle, but I probably won't.
Of course it isn't as easy as jumping from one Eddy to another, we have to go through another underwater cave!
At least they aren't semen monsters!
Oh god so many ridiculous currents
and that treasure was a piece of shit Hi Magic, not even anything good!
New concept: Underwater doors. Which is weird, because in the other caves, the different rooms were connected by Eddys, but in this one there are doors. What the hell Taito, consistency is a good thing.
Yeah, first fucking group of Fire Plates I fought down here. What the fuck. Still no Might Sword though
Then again, we're super fucking powerful now with two suits of might armor. You'll see the results of this later on.
Jerin knowing trick is better than Mixam knowing it, because then mixam doesn't have to waste a turn buffing and can just stab things.
Fucking toxic marsh everywhere here, who the fuck would want to work in a place surrounded by toxic marsh?
Toxic marsh INSIDE the fucking thing too. Man, how inconvenient! I hope the people who drill for the power oil or whatever have unionized.
Good thing I got that key.
I think this does extra damage to dragons, man, why would I want that?!
I think this ring let's you do more damage to dragons. But why would I need that? Also, more toxic marsh.
Of course, they MEANT to say Ifrit, but I guess Efreet works too.
You'd think the programmers would realize that throwing the same enemies at me over and over with the same attack strategies and same weaknesses wouldn't be a good idea, because I'd figure out how to kill them. But alas, another armored foe who takes immense damage from flash-magic. They can cast boost, but rarely stick around long enough to get the chance. Case and point:
Yeah, fucking fried that's what he is.
Valor is a little spell that FULL HEALS YOUR ENTIRE PARTY. It's pretty amazing and the end boss is so hard it's invaluable in the fight. Don't worry, Jerin learns it later, I won't have to rely on Mixam for healing, that would be silly!
Oh hey a dragon, no wonder I keep finding all these dragon hurting things. I equipped Aguro with the Dragon Ring in preparation!
Do you think his skin is all greasy?
This is his most frequently used attack, which looks like flame at first but eventually powers up to look like Vulcan. Which is weird, they gave different moves the same name. At least it isn't Dubious, what the fuck.
Apparently the Oil DRAGON doesn't count as a dragon because Aguro is doing less damage than Mixam in this fight, due to the fact that I unequipped the HiPowerRing.
And the dragon arrow does piss poor damage too! What the hell, fucking LIES that's what this game is full of!
That's how much his physical attack does. MIGHT ARMOR
MIGHT MAKES RIGHT, MOTHER FUCKER!
He uses this gross move called oily air (which doesn't even make sense, air doesn't have texture!) which lowers my characters' agility. Oh no, what ever shall I do?
What ever shall I do?!
Let's take this oil and shove it up Raile's ass. Maybe then he'll be able to fly!
I'm sure you're all so interested in seeing the next bit of dialogue, but in the interest of not shooting myself in the face, I'm going to skip it. Let's just say he and a couple people board the Falcon, and then the screen shakes, and he says done after a few seconds. And we promise to come back, ALL FOUR OF US (including Lufia) BUT THEN!
Oh noesz! Wait where?
Oh snap! The wind is turbulent around the tower! You'll have to go through the pointlessly long cave that connects you to it, and then climb up the even longer tower! It's northwest of here.Well that's fucking lame as all hell. Well at least there are no more fetch quests, right guys? This is actually plot related!
A tank with helicoptor blades!
He even left the blueprint in here with it!
Okay let's go to the village next to the tower so we can save and shit! . . . Wait fuck that, I WANT TO HAVE ALL MY WISHES GRANTED!
Egg shrine! This is West of Herat, so you know.
They only had enough memory for one dragon sprite, clearly.
If you wanna be my lover. . . Wait what the fuck I apologize for that.
Oh yeah! OH YEAH!
Yeah yeah I know the drill, I'll go get them later. I mean, RIGHT NOW!
WOO! I HAVE THE POWER! More like Greyskull Bow right guys?
Man Roman is a jerk, he doesn't even care about how we are, or what we've done. It's just business, business, business with him! Oh sorry there's a reason I'm in Alekia, apart from the fact that I flew randomly around and ended up there.
Alekia Castle- 1/8
Northwest Tower (the one with Artea's Apprentice)- 2/8
Belgen- 3/8
Cave Southwest of Belgen- 4/8
Random, pointless cave that links Marse and Bakku, even though I could get to Marse by boat- 5/8
Elba Island- 6/8
Underwater (most of the FAQs just said the caves under Ring Island, except there are three of them. Luckily, I found it right away)- 7/8
And the Oil Cave, again- 8/8
ALSO:
Jerin learned Rally, thus radically increasing her usefulness!
Okay, I'll get my wish granted again later, let's continue on:
Here's the tower, but if I try to fly near it I get blown all around, so I'll check out the nearby town first, before I attempt to actually enter.
The town, named. . . uh. . . well the name isn't very important anyway, okay!
Huh, a greeter. Kind of like Wal Mart, but not the epitome of all evil.
Is this an inn? What the hell?
I think it's rather convenient! I guess so. . . it's sort of overstated. Man do you use big words to sound smart? Fuck you, Aguro! You're such an asshole! What are you going to do, cry about it? God I'm never sleeping with you again. You say that now, but once you go green you never go back! That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard! Women can't resist my bulging pectorals! Ha someone has delusions of grandeur! At least I don't look like I'm twelve! At least I'm not attracted to members of the opposite sex who look like they're twelve!
WILL YOU TWO SHUT THE FUCK UP OR I WILL FRY YOU BOTH WITH LIGHTNING BOLTS AND THEN PUNCH YOUR CORPSE IN THE FACE! yes ma'am. . . . sorry.Most of this conversation didn't actually happen
Moving on,
If only you knew, kid. If only you knew.
For sale at the shop is Zircon stuff, most of which is useful. It can't measure up to my Might Armor, but the rest is good at least.
MWAHAHA! MIGHT MAKES RIGHT!
It's slightly stronger, but fuck it, it doesn't hit all enemies in a group like the Might Bow. MIGHT MAKES RIGHT!
Aguro equips an axe, for some reason, and it doesn't make much sense, but okay. See, Guy equips Axes sometimes in Lufia II, so it makes sense for him, but Aguro has only equipped swords up to this point. Weirdo.
Hmm, why would they make this sword if Dual Blade is better? Strange. . .
. . . So I have to go get it? I hope they mean it's in the cave on the way to the tower. Oh god please be in the cave on the way to the tower. . .
What a useful young person! Why yes, tell me!
Aw you asshole. Fine, I will.
Wait I want Apple, not Plum!
Huh, but he only sells Apple cider. . .
Yeah gimme the info!
Aw fuck, okay, so I just have to go fetch the key from the north cave first. Okay. Last fetch quest in the game, though! FOR REAL THIS TIME! (not including the eggs)
. . . I forgot to screenshot the cave enterance but TRUST ME it's north of that tower.
and Zaurus Rex! Wooooo! I don't think Gorgons can turn you to stone. They suck at being Gorgons. And Zaurus Rex can use glacier. I guess they're icy dinosaurs.
Racist ring, more like it! WHERE'S THE BLACK RING HUH?!
It's like a HiPower Ring, but better!
More metal enemies! Although, the thing about Barients. . . they drop Might Helmets. But I'm not lucky enough to get one, I guess I expended all my luck on my two Might Armors.
Huh, I mean, I don't need this, but I guess I'll hold onto it, just in case. . .
DOORS!
Let's take. . . THE RIGHT ONE!
Which leads to ANOTHER DOOR! Which leads to. . .
A TELEPORTER!
Good thing I took the right one first, because that switch probably changes the destination of the teleporter, so I got this mind potion, yay.
The left door lead to the switch, okay let's go back and use the teleporter.
And I'm at a new place! This is part of the area past the left door, but I couldn't get to it before.
Well this cave wasn't too bad. I don't know why I posted so many pictures of it, though. . .
This apparently prevents instant death, but it isn't all that useful, since it doesn't raise any stats, so it isn't as good as the other shit I have.
Okay, here's the cave that actually takes me to the tower. It's pretty long, but whatever.
This little patch of water makes me want to. . . play tetris for some reason. . .
IT SURE IS! Oh wait its name is humungus. Is that its hair, or is it wearing an old leather footbal helmet? The other thing is Gloom, which makes me feel warm and fuzzy because Oddish is one of my favorite pokemon.
Yeah, uncreative name, sprite recoloring etc. etc.
Oh, there's the black ring.
I'm giving this to her because it jacks up her MGR, and that makes her even more useful, since now she excels at something!
Hmm, healing pads. That's nice.
PILLARS EVERYWHERE UP IN HERE! But seriously, there are tons of fucking pillars everywhere for no reason here.
Wow. This is seriously the GAYEST looking enemy ever. He has that look about him, like he's running at you, but he doesn't look intimidating in the slightest. He looks like he's going to give you a big giant hug! Seriously though, worst enemy ever.
These things are annoying, hard to kill, and can summon other skulls. They piss me off to no end.
That's not Holy Water, that's. . . GAMMA RADIATION! But seriously, are they crazy, or just pissed off? I don't know, but look at the EXP they give you:
I wonder if that was on purpose?
Jerin learns Valor, and now she's reached near max Usefulness! If she had a Might Helmet, which raises INT as well as DEF and MGR, she'd be even better.
Here's the locked door, past it is the exit, YAY! We're at the tower!
Here we go, we're at the tower! And of course it'll be another boring walk through a different colored tower of the same wall and floor textures and. . .
Wow, this is. . . unique. I like it!
All the floors have this "hallway," which I think is supposed to be like a balcony that wraps around the tower, since if you walk left or right it loops.
Hmm, interesting floor patterns. I like this tower, it looks pretty awesome. Even though it's annoying and long and well you'll see.
There are four "elemental" type enemies, even though they aren't weak to the opposing element or anything. This game has a shitty element system.
These guys use a move called Earth which is actually just Thunder, and does way too much damage. And they do it every turn. They're assholes. For some reason they don't resist flash-magic.
These guys have low HP and die quickly. And look stupid, like the other enemies here.
This supposedly makes insta-death spells hit more often, but that's lame, so I won't use it.
More cool floor patterns.
There are healing pads here too! Great, except I had just used an Ex Magic on Lufia to restore all her MP! Grr wasting items pisses me off.
I was going to make a refernce to the Rancid song "Whirlwind," which is on their album Rancid 93, but I didn't think anyone would get it so I decided against it.
Yeah, there's a teleporter. I know you haven't seen, but there were the destinations of teleporters all over the tower, some were by chests you could only get by teleporting (I'll get them when I come back in a bit for the Dragon Egg that will be here), some are on random floors, and two are in places you can only get to by teleporter. The plate is referring to:
Depending on which switches are down, it takes you to different destinations. The only two important ones are pressing the middle and right ones, which takes you to:
LOTS OF TREASURE! A bunch of miracles, one of each stat raising potion, and a revive.
And if you press only the middle one, you get to:
The correct path! This takes you to the roof.
There's nothing here? Oh wait, a crazy monster is appearing.
OH NOESZ! Actually this is the easiest boss fight ever.
He's stupid looking.
He does INTENSE AMOUNTS OF DAMAGE like 20 and 11 by casting low level spells! OH NO! I quickly dispatched of him.
Yeah.
Huh?
He's making Lufia's head hurt!
Oh noesz she's starting to emit energy now! And Dual Blade started to ring too! OH SHIT WATCH OUT!
ASSPLOSION! Oh shit her energy erupted all over the roof of this place! Shit.
WHAT? Did I do this?!
That voice! It's Daos!
Lufia. . . 
sypop:
I am pleased. The Dual Blade has triggered your mind. My gamble paid off. Daos? What do you mean? Where are you?! What are you saying? Why do you think I wouldn't destroy the very thing that threatens me? I gave you Dual Blade so that it would unlock your memories! No, it can't be. . . Accept the truth. Even know, you are stuggling to hold onto Lufia. Accept yourself as Erim! But. . . Did you not just call Mixam "Maxim"? Your memories are returning! You are Erim, the Sinistral of Death! Now, take the Dual Blade and come to me! No way in hell am I doing that! Take the Dual Blade, or you will fade into oblivion! Mixam will destroy me. . . He is our foe! He has Maxim's blood! You called him Maxim because the same energy flows through him, the energy that can destroy us! But if you bring us Dual Blade, nothing can stop us! Forget about Mixam and come to me!
There she goes. . .
Daos! Destroy them now! No! She hasn't fully awakened yet. . . give it time. . . We have Dual Blade, Mixam is powerless!
Oh noesz.
Lufia! Jerin! Are you okay?! Yeah, I'm fine. Wait, where's Lufia? She's gone! Mixam! Dual Blade! What? It's right. . . NOOOO THEY BE STEALIN MY DUAL BLADE! Mixam, can it be true? Absolutely out of the question! Don't even think of it!Meanwhile, at the fortress of doom. . .
Oh snap! Has she turned?
I have Dual Blade. Good, give it here. Why didn't you destroy me? I could have killed you with this. First of all, your sword handling skills are non-existant. Secondly, you're Erim, you wouldn't destroy your own brother! Now, give me Dual Blade!
OH NO!
Aw, it can be broken pretty easily. But then again, I guess he is Pure Evil and all.
Yeah, this is pretty bad. What will we do?
Doom Island appears to be moving South East.
It looks like the final battle may be upon us. . . after I get my wishes granted two more times.
And I might get a might sword or a might helm, although I don't know where I can fight a lot of those guys who drop might helms. Well, I guess there's only one more update before the end. Aw, it's so close to being over, I'm sad.