Part 14: Two Boring Updates For the Price of One!

Chapter 12: Two Boring Updates For the Price of One!



Hey, we're finally on the mountain pass! YAAAAY

Yeah this dungeon is kind of boring. Sorry.



Sometimes I think I'm never going to find a monster sprite that wasn't taken from Lunar 1, apart from bosses. Not going to find one in this dungeon!

Let's test out Lemina, then. Unlike Jean, her AOE spells have a pretty decent range on them. I honestly don't think there's a lot of practical different between Fire Ring and Ice Wall aside from the element and that Ice Wall takes one more 1 MP (I don't know either). Let's demo Fire Ring for now.



It's a nice spell. Now, I'd like to demo the rest of her spells, but while I was playing I started to realize something. First of all, Lemina can use her staff like an item.



The Water Staff's spell is basically Lemina's Ice Pick, although it doesn't do quite as much damage. It still does a respectable amount, especially considering it's free. Banshee Fowls are particularly weak to it, but it still does respectable damage to the Wyburn. Who can cast that spell, actually.





It's a bit nasty. They telegraph it when their eyes are flashing. Oh! And the Banshee Fowl have a special attack too!



They, uh, throw their head at you. As far as I can tell, it doesn't inflict a status. It just hits you hard.

Anyway, it's here that I realize that the enemies, while their HP is high, they're fairly weak and I've got enough party members that I can take them out without MP. So I didn't use MP, with the exception of healing spells. This is actually a good idea, as this is a surprisingly long haul, but it doesn't make this dungeon any less boring.



And the enemies don't give good rewards either. That's from one of the larger enemy groups, too.



Nor is it interesting to navigate. You have two different areas; in door and outdoor.



And this is indoor. The only difference between the two is that one enemy appears indoors and not outdoors.



This is the enemy. Grog Snake.



This is their special attack, a body slam. Again, it just does a lot of damage.

No, there's no maze here, either. There is one branching path; that's it.



Here it is. Go left first. There's treasure.



Here is the treasure. Two of 'em are just Herbs.



And this is the only noteworthy bit of treasure in the whole dungeon. It's a decent upgrade to Jean's defense, and it also increases her attack a little bit. Not bad.

Hell, there's no music! Just the sound of wind blowing. Listen to the opening credit song again instead. It's very pretty. Frankly, the most interesting thing about the dungeon is its name: Bandit Butte. Because if you take off the "e", it's Bandit Butt. He he. Butt.





Oh, and Lucia has a new spell. Mystic Defender raises defense by a bit, and she'll always cast it on, well, herself. So it's pretty much useless to me. Keeping up your streak, ain't ya Lucia?

All right, screw this. Let's fast forward to the summit and the only interesting part of this dungeon.


: This feeling... it's... it's... somehow familiar...



Boss fight!

Yeah, that's how the game sets this fight up. Some... random asshole jumps you out of nowhere.



And then he freezes half your party. What a dick!





That was needlessly dramatic.

So the Phantom Sentry. Or "Phantom Sntry" if you prefer. You know, I prefer "Bandit Butt." Let's call him Bandit Butt.

Despite the fact he froze over half your party, this isn't going to be any trouble.







Well that didn't take long.



And then he did that. I have no idea why he did that. And he just stayed there for the rest of the battle.

The game was kind and the freeze wore off after the first round. With Ronfar back in commission, I should be fine. How much damage can this guy do, anyway?







That's a bit underwhelming.





He does get two of those, but... yeah, this isn't going to be a problem.

I'd like to note that very few enemies in this game get more than 1 hit, and most of them bosses. I don't think a single enemy gets three attacks. In Lunar 1, though, enemies with multiple attacks was pretty common. Hell, one of the penultimate bosses got four.

With even less HP than Plantella, so-so damage, and no ability to inflict (further) status ailments, the Bandit Butt isn't remotely a challenge.



I had Lemina mess around a bit with her spells, so here's Flame. It's rather visually uninteresting.



And here's her Ice Wall. It doesn't do any more damage than Ice Pick, so there is no point in using it in this battle, but there you go.

In any case, the battle ends pretty quickly.



And the Bandit Butt must return to his home planet.



But he left us some presents. Ain't that sweet? Lemina gained two levels, while everyone else gained one!



I haven't actually shown it, but you get range increases every so often.



Man the game really gives Jean an insane amount of MP.


: I warn you! Do not interfere with us!
: Your time to come to this world is not yet! It is my duty to protect the gateway!
: ...
: Uh... what was that all about?

That is a very good question Ruby.

: It... it can't be... we need to get moving again. Let's continue.

So uh, you care to explain this? Any of this? No? All right.

Well that was a boss. At least it was easy. Barely drained my MP. Good thing too, because we're only half-way through the dungeon.

You know what happens in the rest of this dungeon? Absolutely fuck all. The path is completely linear, the treasure is very easy to find and not all that noteworthy (we do get a Starlight, that's nice) and the battles are easy. Everyone gained a level. Lucia dies a lot because I don't heal her. I abused the hell out of Lemina's staff, and I broke out an attack spell once.

And that's all she wrote.



If we go south, that'll lead back into Takkar, but the gate is still locked and we can't even talk to the priest there. So instead we head north, to Nota.

By the way, hope you have been super careful with your MP, because it is a long journey. Also, the last Althena Statue was before the mountain, and we can't top off back in Takkar.



The enemies aren't new either; just the same enemies we've fought on the world map before.









I'd like to re-iterate that this is a rather long walk.



HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAtttte- sorry, I'm not sure what came over me.



But we made it!



Welcome to the lovely town of Nota. Since that dungeon was boring as tar, let's explore Nota just so this update has something of note in it.



And rob the people blind, as is our prerogative.


: Pretty soon, his store will even be bigger than the one in Meribia!
: Well now, that's quite a boast. The store in Meribia is gigantic!

I believe this is the first mention of Meribia. Meribia is one of the few cities that are in both games, along with Vane. In Lunar 1, Meribia was the biggest city in the game, and a bustling trade center. Also some asshole rips out off and you have to crawl through the sewers to get to him because they gotta cram in the sewer level somewhere.

: It's cool that dad is the biggest merchant in Nota, but I wish he'd stay home more often. I miss him when he's on the road... uh, don't tell him I said that, okay? He'd just call me weak...

Hey, it's not weak to miss your dad! Did Yonah missing her dad make her weak? No! Her disease did that!

...



Oh course you fuckers are here too. All right, let's go check out their opulent shrine an-



Oh. This is... kind of homey. Apart from the clones staring at each other.


: Now, it's a gift to the service of Althena. I guess I'm what you'd call a true believer.
: True sucker is more like it! You mean to say that you got nothing for this house? I can't even imagine what could have been going through your mind!

Oh Lemina, don't be so cynical. This would a touching story of self-sacrifice if he, you know, hadn't donated his home to a cult.


: It's really quite a safe and effective stimulant and health tonic. The only minor side effect is atomic diarrhea...
: Atomic diarrhea? Geez, I wonder how dangerous a dragon with that would be? Talk about a blast that last! Whoo! I don't want to think about it...

Neither do I. Why does it always come back to poop with these games?


: Take my word for it, the shopkeepers here can rip you off, so watch yourself!

All right, whatever you say lady.


: Is she talkin' to me? I'm no kid!
: Maybe she was just watching how you act...

Do I need to remind ya'll of Ronfar's actual official age? No? Okay.


: In fact, I'll be happy to satisfy any of your needs. Just ask.
: Uh, is she saying what I think she's saying?

Wait, any of our needs? Well, we do have this guy we want to leave us alone...

Oh wait, this is a sex thing, not an assassin thing, isn't it? Nevermind then.


: It's a very strange place. I wonder what's there?
: Maybe it's filled with mounds of ancient treasure! Let's go find out!
: Whoa there, little miss! That place is rumored to be crawlin' with the undead! I certainly don't want to fight things I can't kill. Especially if they're hell-bent on killing me! I'd say those ancient ruins are a lose-lose proposition. I'll pass.

We're going to those ruins. For the record, I'm with Ronfar on this one.



Wait, there's a Dragonmaster? When?

: He's the greatest of the Four Heroes, and he works with Althena herself!

So... the Dragonmaster is one of the Four Heroes? I mean, the new crop of Four Heroes. Is it Leo? I wouldn't think so, you think I'd have heard about that. I mean, if the Dragonmaster was pimping around on a steamship you'd think people would mention that a bit.


: C'mon, a beautiful flower for a beautiful lady, what do ya say?
: I'd rather have a beautiful 1000S coin. Can you arrange that, too?





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: Listen, I got the secret to making tons of money. Come closer and I'll tell you how to do it.
: Really? A secret way to make big money? Spill it!
: Okay, you've got to stare into my eyes... stare really hard...
: Oh... my... I seem to... to be getting.... sleepy...
: Hehehe.... sucker!

Oh. Oh wait. You did not-



That son of a bitch took 1000 silver from me! Jackass!


: I tried to warn you, but did you listen? Noooo, that would be too easy!

Yeah, just rub salt into the wound. Thanks a pantload, lady.



Fuck y'all I'm getting some equipment.



There are two pieces of armor we already have, the Iron Armor to the left and the Aura Dress to the right. Everything else is new. The Steel Armor pictured is an upgrade for Hiro, and we finally get a shield! The Wood Shield only adds 2 defense, but I'm happy for any upgrades I get. At the end is the Chain Helm; since I didn't buy a Bandana for Hiro, this is the first piece of headgear he gets. Although the Chain Helm only adds 2 to defense as well. I buy Hiro all three of the new equipment, and I buy a Chain Helm for Ronfar, since that's the only piece of equipment here he can equip.

While Hiro's HP is still sad as hell, all these upgrades to his armor really, really start to boost his durability. Magic will still rip him a new one, though.



There's only two new weapons in the weapon shop: the Great Sword, and the Iron Fan. The "Blasts Enemy" thing you see just means that sometimes the Great Sword pushes enemies away from you. It's not that exciting. I buy both of the weapons, although I probably shouldn't have bothered with the Great Sword.

I'd like to note that Lemina can equip the Bow, and I could buy for her if I wanted to. I don't, though. Her staff's magic does pretty decent damage, and it boosts her wisdom by 10.

Also, man I have a lot of money still. I don't remember having so much money last time I played this game. And I'm not grinding. I got lost a bit in the Illusion Woods, and had to make a major backtrack to treasure in Bandit Butte, but that's it.

Hm, well ain't gonna complain about my surplus. Since I'm done here, let's move on.


: Give me a break! You're not going to sell anything with a pitch like that! Why don't you try jazzing it up a little bit? You'll sell more, I guarantee it.

Now I want some snack mix, man.


: It's the only trade route between the two halves of the city.

I'm starting to have an uneasy feeling. Last time we went to a town with a bridge connecting parts of it together, it ended badly. Although this time I don't hear the faint sound of banjo music, so it'll probably be okay.



Well, balls.


: You did well to get this far, but you'll not escape my grasp again. Men, restrain our friends.



Yeap, we are totally secured now.

: Wait right there. I'll be right up to inspect our little 'catch.'


: Why is Lord Leo interested in us?

Oh right... that. Forgot to mention something...

: Jean, you are so dim at times. He's obviously interested in Lucia.

How can tell that, Lemina? He didn't address Lucia directly or anything. Okay, Lucia is super obvious and weird, but still. Unless she means "interested" which... still makes no sense.

: Shut up, Lemina! Do you want him to hear us?
: Okay, kiddies, knock it off! We've got to get out of this mess, and fast...

What daring plan do our intrepid heroes have for getting out of this sticky situation?!

: Let's make a run for it!



: Ha! At last we've caught you, destroyer! You thought your clever girlish disguise would throw me off, but you were wrong. I'm on to your game. This is the end for you!

Oh no, will they be able to escape?



...



...



So, uh, you just gonna stand there?



Leo really needs new men.


: We're going to have to go to the Carnival and try Bulgy's Magic Arrow.

Wait... haven't I heard of that before-



Wait, no...

: It's the only way we're going to get past Nota and Lord Leo.

Jean, no, this is a terrible idea.

: The carnival? That sounds like fun! How does the Magic Arrow work?
: It's probably better you don't know.

It's probably better we do know, since we're planning on riding it. Is there really no better option?

: Pardon the obvious pun, but it sounds like our only shot at escape.
: Carnival? What is a carnival? Have I seen one?
: Honestly, Lucia. Sometimes I am just amaze at how shallow your knowledge is!

Have we told Lemina, or anyone else, that Lucia is a space alien yet? We probably should.

: If you pay me, I'll tell you all about carnivals.
: Knock it off, Lemina! This is no time for games! The carnival is on the north part of the Madoria Plains. We'd better move.

Besides, Lemina, we have a communal money bag. Any money she'd pay you would go right back into the pile.

With Althena's Guard sitting on the bridge, one would have to wonder what these folks think about the soldiers blocking their only path to the other side of the city.


: Like, do you know what this means? Althena is watching our town personally! Like, I think I have to get my nails done...

One would have to wonder what a non-idiot thinks.


: People are stuck here and drinking like fish until the bridge reopens.

Despite some people profiting from this, no, no one's really happy.





...well said?


: They don't see the art... I just brought in a new shipment of toenail clippings. Wanna see 'em?



think we need to leave Nota. Next time, we go to the circus!!!