Part 43: Funeral for a Failure

Doo doo doo dooo workin' my monster to exhaaauuuuust-iooooooon








Daa da daaa not gonna stop 'till he's deee-aaaaad




Well, that's a start.

Hey, he's back! Welcome home, Bongo! Feeling better?

I'm sure he is! I'll help him recuperate.











No I'm not! He likes it! Here, I'll prove it. We'll put him in another tournament and you can watch him win with a smile on his hideous, hideous face.




Bongo's ugliness is still his greatest weapon.



Wow, he's going to have a lot of free time now before the next match... Hmm...




Well, that went by quickly.



Jesus! I think we might just win this one on his ugliness alone.



Or, maybe not.




Yes! Maybe this will finally push it.

What are you talking about?

Oh... Uh... I'm high. High on the cocaine. Pay no attention to my drug-fueled ramblings.





Could it be...?



FINALLY! Christ, I was beginning to think he was invincible.

You... you WANTED him to die?! That is horrible! I... God. I need to see a priest. Or a monk.





Are you fuckin' crazy? He was a waste of cells. I wanted him to be worked to death for my profit and I must say that that mission was accomplished.

You're a monster! No, you're worse than that! I can't work with someone like you any more. I quit.



You deserved better. I'm... I'm so sorry.



Eh. She'll be back. In the meantime, I needs a new monster. A good monster. Hopefully, Bootsy Collins and the spirit of Funk will be with me this time.




Another golem, huh? Well, at least he's not as much of an aberration as that other thing was.



And he has some pretty decent stats, too. I think I'll keep him. Come on, Galvatron, let's take you out for a test drive!



I haven't boosted his stats or done anything other than feed him a single fish. Let's see what he can do without my guiding hand. Or Holly's, but she isn't a factor anymore.



Sweet



Fuck



YES!

Galvatron is already an instrument of destruction! I might actually make it past S-Rank with this one. You're gonna make me rich, Galvatron! Rich!



I knew you'd be pleased. So! With the unpleasantness that was Bongo out of the way, what kind of training should I put my GOOD monster through?