Part 25: Wherein many are taken by surprise

: Just one wagon! We can say it got taken away by bandits!
: No.
: Yer killing me here, lad! All that swag to go un-hoarded!
: Agda hates to interrupt, but elves are killing elves up ahead.



: Okay! Uh… which side do we help?
: Obviously we help 'em kill the black elves, they're always the evil ones.
: Woah woah woah, okay, hold on there.
: We do not refer to them as black elves, okay?
: Plus sometimes Drow ain't so bad, right? Can't judge a book by the readin' things on the front.
: So are these elves evil?
: Well they're called kinslayers so… Agda thinks yes.



: At least we can keep their stuff, right?
: So long as it does not belong to the Wood Elves, that sounds fair.
: Wait, I thought Drow stuff melted in the sun and that's why they lived underground? I thought I heard that somewhere…
: Honestly, Aka hears the silliest stories sometimes. Melting equipment, yeah right.



: Wow, uh, these Wood Elves seem to be doing fine on their own.
: Pretty good for folks made of wood!
: Huh? But I-
: Just concentrate on hitting the bad ones and don't try to think too hard, dearie.



: Haha! These …uh, 'Drow' ain't so bad. All of the fun of elf-killing, none of the guilt or criminal charges!



: We've won, yet they don't seem too quick to thank us for our help.
: Does anyone actually speak Elf?
: Who doesn't speak common these days?
: Maybe they don't get many language teachers out in the deep forest.
: Lazy, ungrateful buggers! It only takes a decade or two!
: Oh well, never mind. Let's smile and wave and head back to New Leaf.



: Everybody just… try to ignore her dancing okay?
: Ooooh, I'm not forgetting that sight any time soon!
: I don't like their songs. I like sing-alongs!
: Pity she's wearing that thick plate too, really. I bet with it off she could really - ouch!
: Agda doesn't approve of being skeezy behind people's back!



: Closure's nice.
: Booooooored. Can we go home now?



: Good idea. Time to head for home and a hot bath!
: Pass on the bath, I'm dying for a cool drink!
: There were baths at the tavern! We could've stayed longer!
: Oh, you just wanted another chance to fawn over your music pals.
: Did Calanire get 'em to sign anything?
: Sure! They signed my armour!
: I don't see any writing.
: They uh… _{signed the inside of my armour.}



: I forget why we're here again.
: Boss. Missing associates. Merchants know. Gain their trust. Do odd jobs.
: Y'see it don't get any more interesting every time you explain it.



: It appears an intrigue is building around the merchants.
: Almost exciting this time! Can't wait to see them at each other's throats!



: Uh… looks like we'll have to hear about how the meeting goes second hand. There's a note here from Sa'Sani. She has another group of agents she wants to use for this job.
: What?! After all we do for that frigid jerk-lady and finally we get a cool job and Sa'Sani passes it off to some other guys?
: I suspected she didn't think much of us… rather a blow to the self-esteem.
: Or an insult t'the pride! I mean, if we had much.
: Who's she sending?
: Doesn't say… but whoever they are, I hope they're up to the challenge.






Somewhere in the fog, North of Crossroad Keep



: Navigation's my least favourite job.
: It's either that or pay for a map, and the price would come out of your share of the pay.
: …S'not so bad now I come to think of it.
: I didn't think so.



: What was the name of this town again? Berryville or Cornhole or something?
: Conyberry. The contract is simple enough, prevent three VIPs from coming to harm, either external or from each other.
: Remember, we are nominally agents of one of the merchants backing the meeting. Did anyone read the contract?
: Vaguely.
: Don't read.
: I was gonna, but Beef thought it was a napkin.
: Beef's ice cream spilling! Beef need paper to stop fingers getting sticky.



: We are venturing quite seriously into the sticks. No, scratch that, we are now into bona-fide trunks.
: Not far now.
: Why all the secrecy for a merchant meeting? Do they fear a mob of eager accountancy fans will descend on their meeting, causing a scene with their drinking and team songs?



: Found it.
: Finally. I'd say I hope we're not late were I not ambivalent to this boring babysitting task.
: Cyric's flapping maw, you ever give that tongue of yours a rest?
: Only when I meet a conversational sparring partner on my own level. Needless to say I am beginning to miss their absence.



: Excellent, it appears our three marks - er, VIPs are already here. The meeting should be starting any moment.
: Why not introduce us? I'll do a preliminary patrol of the perimeter to make sure we were not followed.
: Beef no good with first impressions. Get scared, talk too much, maybe squash head on accident.
: "On accident?"
: I know. His grammar is atrocious.



: Good evening lady and gents, we will be your hired muscle for this evening. Compliments of… whoever hired us. _{Damn, where is that little nuisance when I need him?}
: Keep your hands where we can see 'em and away from Beef's mouth and we should be okay.
: I'm no fan of get-togethers. Gonna hang back.
: Suit yourself, wallflower.



: Waaaagh! Old man spook Beef!
: He part of the plan?



Heronius: J'accuse! It's always the one who shows up late to the meeting who did it - whatever it is!



: So is he thinking of- woah!



: Waaaagh! Old man spook Beef again!
: Grummush's socket!
: Hells! We didn't do it!
: Yup, he's dead.



: Demogorgon's taint!
: It's an ambush! Yuan-ti at our backs!
: *sigh*, I hate getting backstabbed -hrrrk!



: Stitch is down! Quick! One of you Orc fellows get between me and the snakes!
: Kind of tied up here.
: Hah! Funny.



: Putting up a wall of fire, but it won't slow them down for long.
: Beef to rescue! Smashed snakes before, don't mind repeating self!
: What about the VIPs?
: I'll be a Very Dead Person in a moment if you don't get over here!



: This is bloody madness!
: Aye, not half bad! The gods smile on a fight like this
: Beef happy that friend happy! Means is good fight, right?
: Oh yeah, any fight you can't walk away from is a good fight.



: Beef, if you could just hold still- damn it! I only have so many spells… I will keep trying!
: Hey, where magic man going? Heronyus?



: _{I'll still be around… I just need to get clear of this… massacre. Try to hold still!}
: Heronyus? Heronyus! Beef not know what do now!



: Snap out of it, boy! We're surrounded - we need to close ranks, fight back to back!



: You fight pretty well for a halfie, Beef. And a tribeless mountain Orc at that.
: Awww, thanks Grub. Beef just take pride in what Beef do best.
: I'm not gonna let you go out like that, alone. If this is the end, Beef, you're dying as part of the Gurk Tuath, my tribe.
: The wha?
: *sigh* The Flat Noses in common, okay? It's a lot more intimidating in Orc, trust me.
: Beef never have tribe before! Waaaaagh! It good day in general!



: Then come on, Beef! The Hells are wide open! Let's send some of these bastards packing 'fore the gods call us due- uuuurgh!



: Grub? Grub, Beef can't feel anybody at back.
Martin Keller: Your mate's down, big'un. Still too many snakes, too - keep your guard up.



: Beef alone! But Beef not scared! Snakes hear Beef? Not scared! Angry! Beef crush, smash, kill snake men!Waaaaaagh!



: Waaaaahuh?
Martin Keller: Friendly sorcery! Looks like we're not out of this yet!



: Why snake men fall down? Beef not even swing yet!
Aster Merris: I do not recognize the source of the enchantments. Did someone hire more security?



Jon Archen: It appears we have an unseen saviour. The rest of the snake men are breaking off!



: No, not yet! Beef not done taking revenge!
: Wait… now Beef bigger too? Why Beef big? Maybe got too angry?



: There. All dead. Everyone dead or run away. 'cept tiny people and Beef. But who…



: _{Beef, are you okay?}
: Heronyus? That you save Beef with magic?
: Of course it was, you dummy! Why else do you think I turned invisible? Those serpents were about to exact revenge for all the snake leather belts I ever bought.





: We had better leave too, Beef… what are you doing?
: …Beef try lucky coin on friend, Grub. But Grub not come back. Corneelyus say lucky coin bring back friends…
: Not everyone wants to come back, Beef. I believe Grub may have found what he was looking for in his last battle. Unfinished business tends to be a requirement in these cheating death scenarios.
: I am… sorry, Beef.



: Come on, if we're lucky there'll be a very unlucky Halfling still snooping around outside. We'll both feel a lot better.
: *sniff* Okayyyyy…







: Zehir… a name, at last.