Part 10: Episode 10: Jason Takes LA

Boy, do I have good news for you!


Previously on Parasite Eve 2, Aya pursued our mysterious masked villain to the roof of the Akropolis Tower.


Unfortunately, she lost track of him, and was forced to turn back.



And then a thing happened:




Turns out she didn't actually lose track of him, he just hid for a minute so he could jump out and spook ya.

Cutscene PLUS a boss fight! Hooray!


Aya is briefly concerned about the wave of lawsuits no doubt unleashed by this doofus's outfit.


The Grim Goalie slams his fist against the wall as he speaks. Oh, by the way, he can speak.


Our new friend is very animated, and moves around quite a bit as he talks. I highly recommend checking out the videos with him, since the dude's all over the place.


He's so bashful




Ned, let's call him Ned, merrily tosses the object up and down as he asks this.




Ned is appalled at Aya's weak quips.




Ned scrapes his machete across the rails, which ignites it somehow. I guess he carries around lighter fluid to pour all over his crazy knife in case he needs to dramatically make a point? These games really like fire, I'll say that.

Boss Music - Weird Man


Okay, so now we're fighting. This is our first real boss fight, and it's quite a bit more challenging than anything we've faced thus far. That being said, it's still pretty easy, and if you're smart about it, you can easily take him down without getting hit once.


The tricky part of this fight comes from the arena. Apparently, the PE2 dev team really liked the idea of fighting a boss in a narrow corridor. They liked it so much, they made nearly every boss in the game attack you in tiny fucking hallway! As you might imagine, this makes dodging difficult, but Ned here is slow enough that you can keep outside his blade range pretty easily.


You can test out your new grenade pistol on his dumb face, but there's a better use for the grenades in this fight. Also, Aya is completely immobile while reloading, so make sure you do that well outside stabbing range.


Okay, two things here. First, see that little thing with a trail of smoke hurtling towards Aya's face? Well, Ned's only non-blade based attack is firing little grenades out of his backpack. Where they land, they emit a purple cloud that inflicts Paralysis should Aya step into it. Because I'm super awesome, I get beaned right in the face by this grenade, but it gives me a chance to show off Paralysis, I guess.

The other thing is that Aya is not aiming at Ned in this shot. Remember those electrical wires we noticed at various points along the walkway? Well, shooting them at the right time will knock them loose and they will electrocute any strange monkey-men that happen to be standing nearby. Annoyingly, they actually have their own HP values, so one bullet isn't quite enough to do the trick.


Luckily, one well placed grenade will jar it loose, and give Ned a face-full of voltage. As an added bonus, the grenade's explosion also damages him, so you can add an extra 100 or so damage to that hefty number.


Unfortunately, here's what Paralysis does: it inflicts Aya with the stamina of your average Wal-Mart shopper, so a few seconds of any activity not assisted by a rascal scooter forces her to double over and catch her breath. Being rendered completely immobile for moments at a time is a very bad thing, as enemies will gladly take the opportunity to go upside your head. I hate Paralysis, and most of my deaths are still directly caused by it.


Ned will not stop in his pursuit, even after a couple thousand volts, so we need to keep backing off. Here we can clearly see why being Paralyzed sucks so fucking hard.


Status effects don't last forever, so we're soon back to this fight's basic strategy: leaving Ned alone until he's right next to a power cord, then grenade his face. Fall back, repeat step 1.


Haha, fuck you, buddy!


And I dodged your stupid gas grenade, too!


But, in my hubris, I didn't realize I'd been boxed in. You can't actually avoid this, since you can't get around him and he forces you into a dead end, but it can be pretty nerve-wracking the first time around.


The final electric cord has a convenient gas valve nearby, so it roasts Ned in a delightful fashion. At this point, ditch your Grenade Pistol and bust out your SMG (ideally loaded with those Hydra bullets you've been finding).


Your bullet hose should easily be able to stun-lock him, and with a little luck, even knock him back a little. But really you just want to whittle down his remaining HP as quickly as possible.


shoot dat bitch in da face


Burned, beaten, and generally whupped, Ned leaps up onto a light fixture in an attempt to salvage his pride.



: Dude, I'm pretty sure anyone with a grenade launcher could've beaten you. You have a KNIFE. This wasn't exactly a fair fight.




He bounds up onto the helipad because clearly giving us more room to move around in will change the outcome of our battle.


He even sends down the elevator to proof there's no hard feelings!


yesssssss gimme all the BPs



I may have a slightly different weapon equipped for this cutscene.


PE2 is basically Action Hero Poses: the Game




I really love these animations sometimes.


By the way, Ned has a crazy laugh and Darth Vader breathing sound clips. Just, FYI.



: I just shot you a couple dozen times, pal. Remember that? When I kicked your ass?





: Whoop whoop whoop!


And so Ned pulls another super jump out of his ass and leaps clear over to the next building.




I don't know how Aya intended to talk down a crazy monkey-man who can withstand face explosions, but hey, Rupert's back!

: Aya! Where'd he go?

: He jumped to the next building!



: Rup, we literally hunt monsters for a living. I can shoot fireballs because I got an eye transplant as a kid. Really far jumps ain't that crazy.








Insert zany comedy music of your choice here. Record scratch optional.



: Good lord, don't fiddle with it!

: Can you defuse it?


I love these games so much. It's like it was written immediately after watching every action movie from the 80's in some sort of glorious bender.

BOOM


About here, faint explosions can be heard in the background, and the tower begins to tremble underfoot.



: There must have been someone with another detonator.

: We'd better get out of here!


I just want to point out that Rupert says this while standing on top of an exploding building. Rupert is the coolest motherfucker in the world.


...



: Oh, there it is.


What, you thought I was kidding?

FMV Time!


So, we may not have been able to save anyone, or stop the psychopaths responsible, but by God, we are going to see some shit blow up!






Ahhhhh, much better.



: Y'know, I'm gonna chalk that one up as a win.

: How do you figure?

: Because any critters left in the building are sure as hell dead now. Plus, that place sucked anyway.



: You know something, Aya? I like the way you think.












: Wait, what exactly do you want me to say about this one? There's plenty talk about, sure, but you said no spoilers, right? Well, what is there about this guy that isn't spoilers?


: Okay, so there's this guy, right? I can't tell you what his name is, I can't tell you who or what he is, and I can't tell you what he wants or is trying to do. I can tell that he dresses like an idiot and has the dumbest set of weapons I've ever seen. I mean, a fucking knife and some sort of grenade launching backpack? Are we sure this isn't a Star Wars guy or something? Oh, but I can tell you that off-camera, he is the most professional actor I've ever met. British as hell, too. He was starring in a production of Macbeth when we were shooting, so if you stopped by his trailer between shots, you could hear him reciting Shakespeare like a master. Kinda sounded like Brian Blessed, honestly. Dunno why he insisted on that Gilbert Gottfried impression for the character, though...