Part 85: BONUS: Fuck Bewears

I haven’t shown this (obviously) but I’ve been cutting out a lot of Hop’s dumber mannerisms and behavior. Tell me, britgoons, does anyone use the phrase “I’ll be cream-crackered” across the pond? He does. He also tries to Wizard of Oz his way into the champion by chanting to himself after he gets his Dynamax Band. I’ve known a lot of people like him in the past who cover up insecurity with unusual behavior, only for it to make them look even worse. Turns out, if you strip away the attention-seeking, you get somebody actually likeable.


Whatever else happens, I will not be catching a Bewear. It isn’t as visibly diseased as Galarian Meowth, but i won’t be letting one anywhere near me unless I have a shotgun even closer. It puts me in mind of the bad kind of furry. Not the good kind (that likes a certain art style and keeps stranded kids safe and entertained during hurricanes) or even the weird kind (that just wants to masturbate to their unnerving porn in peace and pays struggling artists king’s ransoms like the worlds perviest Renaissance art patrons). No, the bad kind of furry, the kind that includes both diapers and assault rifles in their fursuits and compares fursecution to communism. It looks like Hell’s theme park mascot escaped through the Uncanny Valley just to give me a HUG. It is in Pokémon form. I sincerely thank you for the information you provided in the rest of your post - it’s part of what made me decide on that name, especially since after watching a few clips I think I fall on the “hilarious” side of the spectrum. For that, I forgive you for suggesting I’d willingly interact with a Bewear.


I don’t think these games actually have much geographic connection to their real-life equivalent. It don’t think Stonehenge is on the same latitude as Manchester.