Part 16: Sweet Sixteen

15. Sweet Sixteen


When we last left Lizzie, she was busy being domesticated and educated.




The fact that she was now a young woman did not escape the notice of the city's male populace, as suitors started turning up at the Shinkicker home.


You keep your hands off my little girl, you sleazeball! SHOOORYUKEN!
OOOAARGHoooargh_ooargh
Lizzie, go through his wallet and see what he's got!
Okay, Papa!


Sweet.

---


And so she continued to engage in dreary domestic tasks...



...such as childcare.

And church...

Don't you think it's odd that the church is empty on a Sunday?
Beats me, why don't you ask the big guy?
What... HEY WHERE THE HELL IS EVERYONE?


And housekeeping...

---


More school? Okay, but I get to pick the classes this time.
Deal!



Mistress... don't you think that's a little too much po...
THERE IS NEVER TOO MUCH POWER.
Now, vacation!
Yaaaaaaay!

So they head off to the snow and have a snowball fight on the first day...

Gendo spent the next few weeks recovering with several shattered ribs and a collapsed lung after catching Lizzie's snowball.

---


Lizzie heads back to school and work...




Ug. Boring... slipping... into... coma...
Lizzie...
Valkria!
Thy bravery hast already become well-known throughout the world. Thou art a credit to warriors everywhere. This pleases me. Thou art truly worthy of being called my incarnation in the world of mortals.
But I'm not all that...
In reward for thy bravery, I bequeath to thee my sacred sword. Use it wisely.

A blinding light fills the room. When Lizzie comes to her senses, Valkria has disappeared. All that is left is a sword.



---


...so unless you want me to tell Him what you and those altarboys really been up to on Sundays, you'll put in a good word with the palace, hmm?
You're a black-hearted bitch, Lizzie Shinkicker.


---


Is there even anything of interest to show from this month?
Not that I can think of, Mistress. Maybe they'll be entertained by numbers and bars.




That was terrible.
Sorry, Mistress.


Oh god, and here comes April...



Aaargh, I've had it! I'm off to go poke things with my new sword until they die!
Have fun, Mistress!




Hellooooo? Anyone home?
Oh, you're back. I've been waiting for quite some time to see you.


Again, I don't mind if you're mad. How about some pocket money?
Well, I guess I wouldn't mind putting up with some bribery.




Lizzie spends the rest of the time there systematically annihilating demons and undead for their loot.



Aw, it was nothing.
Now I've got a surprise for you!
What?! TREACHERY!
Not that kind of surprise, idiot.



I made this cigarette case myself. I hope you like it.
...
Papa?
You remembered. You remembered my birthday...
You're not going to start crying again are you?


Oh thank goodness.
Yes, who is it?
H-Hello! I-Is Miss Lizzie at home?
Are you a friend of the mistress?
Friends? What friends?
N-No, uh, that is...
I can't very well announce you unless I know who you are.
You're right, sir butler. I am a friend of your mistress. If you tell her the 'old dragon from the ruins' is here, she will know who you mean.



What! The dragon from the ruins?! So you're the Dragon Grandpa...
Ho ho ho, so you've heard of me. I've also known Lizzie's father for quite some time.
I'll get you someday, you scaly bastard!
Cube, who is it?
Ah, M-m-m-m...
Oh, I wonder who he is?
M-m-m-Miss!! Please marry me!
...what?
W-w-what's up with this guy?
Ho ho ho, Miss, it's me. The old dragon from the ruins. This young fellow says that he wishes to make you his bride. I have come as a matchmaker to help him.
What?! The ruins... You're that dirty old dragon!
Dirty old dragon? Grandpa! What did you do to her?!
Ho ho ho, nothing really. Don't worry. Isn't that right, Miss?
I guess... Well, what about this boy?
W-we also met before! I'm sorry I was rude to you. I was the dragon who was guarding the ruins...
What?! You're that impudent young dragon!
Please excuse how I behaved towards you! I realise I was wrong. But ever since that time, I haven't been able to forget you.
...
Please! Marry me!
But, but aren't you a dragon? I'm a human, so we can't be married.
No! If you have love, then species doesn't matter! Please marry me! I'll be good to you!
Uhm, it looks like a dragon is proposing to the mistress, sir.
I can see that!
What'll you do?



Dad!
And I'm sure it'll be considered bestiality in some states.
Curse you, non-existent Internet! Hurry up and be invented so I can make a fortune.
But I've got a fortune right here.
Oh yeah!

---

Holy fuck! Is Gendo going to marry off his little girl to a little lizard punk with a dirty old grandpa? On the other hand, that's a huge pile of money! What'll we do now?!