Part 21: Episode XXI: Why Was There a Little Girl in the Back of Your Room?
When last we left our heroine, she had a portly gentleman pointing a gun at her while a freshly killed woman was sprawled out on his desk. With that said, let's move a leg... No wonder this whole town got overtaken by zombies. Every last survivor fires a warning shot, calls out in attention, or hesitates dramatically before firing. I wonder how Claire figured that one out... I wonder if Chris ever talked about him... "Brutally ra-""...killed?"
"Sure, we will go with that." "Yes, I failed. Multiple times. Into her stomach." ...back away slowly. Hasn't she killed a few dozen zombies at this point? Is this really a necessary question? ...slowly. Toward the door. No sudden movements... I do not like where this is heading... ... Run away! Run away!
Claire ducks into the other door in Irons' office. Alright, this is fucking ridiculous. I can maybe see all the paintings... Possibly the statues... The armor is really pushing it. But a fucking tiger?! No, this is just silly now. This is a hallway just for the sake of a hallway, by the way. Eh? You've got to use the D-Pad to stalk, fellow. It took me a quarter of the game to figure that out too. The footsteps lead into a dark side room. Perfect place to read a diary!
SECRETARY'S DIARY B "Forth time with a body bag being dragged from his office. I wonder what's up with that." Or, you know, quit your job with working for a sociopath. Just a thought... The last page is ominously blank. Like the Chief got her or something. Since, apparently, every other diary up to this point has been written in to the very last page. Well, that was pointless. Let's get some light in here. Claire could read a diary with perfect clarity in the dark. But a whimpering little girl in the corner eluded her until the lights were on. Well, now she's gone from trapped in the middle of a city filled with monsters to trapped in the middle of a city filled with monsters with some college kid now. Yup, sittin' pretty. So, anyone mind explaining to me how she got past the burning wreckage of the helicopter and past the rape crazy sociopath in the office to end up here? Since, I'm at a loss. "Do you mind calling me back in about half a hour and saying that again?"
"Uhh...sure. I guess I could do that..." This kid is supposed to be twelve, by the way. Despite the fact she looks like she's about seven and is dressed in a cutsey pseudo-Japanese schoolgirl outfit, despite this being the mid-west US. Oh, Japan... Two Umbrella employees? Someone is stuck in the murky end of the gene pool. Telling your child to run through the monster filled streets in the dead of night. Like any loving parent would. "But they mostly come out at night. Mostly." Well aren't you fucking special. It sounded like they ran over budget in the sound department and had one of the editing guys do a fake roar into a mic. Nobody can stop Sherry's speedy trot.
Not making much effort to catch the child, Claire returns to the Chief's office. Well, the little girl, the freshly killed corpse, and the psychopath police chief are all missing. I'm sure there's a horrific fanfic chronicling the goings on following that. In any case, Irons was nice enough to leave the heart key on his desk. A few more items of note. Chiefly, the fact he had his diary wedged up his rear. Healthy reading, I'm sure...
CHIEF'S DIARY I know this guy was likely put in office by Umbrella, but would it kill them to find some, I don't know, a bit less batshit? Between this guy and Alfie back in Code Veronica, I don't see how this policy of equal opportunity loonies is helping business. Nobody is capable of just driving out of town? Or even walking? Leon and Claire strolled right into town and then were able to drive several miles without a hitch? I suppose this goes back to the town IQ barely being in the double digits. Collectively. Brian Irons is the only man in the series who maintains a classical fucking insane attitude. No cross-dressing or opera singing. No elaborate robes or kooky traps. Just murder and rape for old Brian Irons. Behind the Chief's desk is another little item of note. "Its blood forms a serpent
that poisons the earth."
"An eagle glistens, bathed
in blood."
"And the gateway of doom
will open."
So basically, Claire needs to get what's left of those Aztec building block things in order to get to Irons' kiddie porn dungeon or whatever the heck this opens up.
Claire puts the Heart Key to use in the same place Leon had earlier. Ms. Bennet can toss that little cable she picked up earlier to close the shutters here. I sure hope they don't short out or anything down the road. A new enemy, as far as this game is concerned, is found in the basement. As far as we're concerned, we've done this song and dance. Nothing his changed for the old Cerberuses. Poor guys. Claire heads to the area just past the autopsy room which Leon passed up exploring earlier. She finds herself in a back alley of the RPD. Hallways leading into alleys. The circle is complete. A crude little corridor is found below. Which, in turn, reveals a save room off to the side. Not much going on here. Heading back... Goddammit!
Tune in next time for dogpens, chatty reporters, giant spiders, and preludes to sewer levels in Episode XXII: The Rumor Mill.
Bonus Content
I introduce all my guests with fresh corpses:Video
Children are always the best aspect of any horror or action setting:
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Claire gets her throat ripped out by a dog. Still manages to scream perfectly fine:
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