Part 12: Episode XII: The Creature of the Sapin Lagoon.
When last we left our adventurers, Ada was still MIA and Leon was devoured by a lake monster while doing what he loved most. Let's back a minute in time and assume that Leon had not met such a dire and ironic fate.
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Leon hops on the conveniently place motorboat by the dock. Despite the fact that he just saw there's a gigantic lake monster and it might be in his best interest to just hike a mile or two around the lake.
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Wait, nevermind. We've got fucking
harpoons now. We're game.
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Smooth sailing for Mr. Kennedy.
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Though, the game takes on a most peculiar change of pace at this point.
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Yes, sir. Lake monster-smake monster.
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FUCK BUNNIES!
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The startled Leon and his boat let loose a toe line which just happens to get snagged on Del Lago. What are the odds?
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Leaving the monster of the deep to have no choice but to begin a pattern based boss fight.
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Luckily, the small one man motor boat is stocked with enough harpoons to take down Moby Dick.
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Unfortunately, he doesn't have the sense to evade the giant fuck-off pieces of debris floating about.
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A grave mistake.
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Though, easily remedied by mashing X or A like a motherfucker and hoping you had full health when that happened.
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As, apparently small wooden boats give Del Lago indigestion and he will only subject himself to the finest free floating man meat.
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A few more rounds of this and the beast starts taking it in the ass, like a man.
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When suddenly, the boat comes to a stop and everything becomes eerily quiet. Until the indicator telling you the direction of the fuck off monster barreling towards you starts. But, it's fairly serene before that..
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The water based version of the vagina monster from Star Wars comes full force at him, open female genitalia at the ready. Leon only has one shot.
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And it's good! Not pictured: It's good! Del Lago goes belly up with a might roar and descends into the murky depths.
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Leon breaths a sigh of relief. It is short lived, however.
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As he completely forgot that anchor that was hooked on the monster was apparently attached to his foot this entire time.
Tragically, the unseen force controlling him at the time was having a sip of Mountain Dew and munching on some Cheetos and Leon was dragged into the grimy deep.
Video
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But for narrative's sake, we'll give him a mulligan.
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"That's the last time I try to anchor a boat with my leg."
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Disaster adverted, Leon heads for shore.
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There, Leon feels himself overcome by pain.
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What horrible evil is lurking within him?
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Gingivitis!
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He bursts into a nearby cabin, hoping desperately this savage reader and toilet using natives still perform proper dental hygiene.
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To his horror, he comes to realize Bitores had the only bathroom in the tri-state area as he slips into unconsciousness.
With both our adventures passed out in assorted locations, what possible terrific adventures could ensue during their absences? Not a lot, actually. Tune in next time in
Episode XIII: An Unlucky Number Indeed.
Bonus Content:
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We've finished Chapter 1-3 and with it, the first chapter!