Part 15: 14. "Maybe they were using this as some kind of short-cut, or back route."

14. "Maybe they were using this as some kind of short-cut, or back route."

Okay, where were we? Oh yeah. So, Randam and Gilian just junked their first Snatcher, Baran Purnet. Unfortunately, a second as-of-yet unknown Snatcher managed to escape our heroes. Fortunately, Baran left behind a clue.





You might want to turn up your suspension of disbelief for a second. Wait, we're playing a chibi anime game. Never mind.









Okay, I'm sorry. I know cults are crazy and all, but would you ever join an organization known as Skull Spider?

...Actually, that doesn't sound too bad, come to think of it. It's like the guys who joined Cobra in GI Joe.

There might be a translation error here. We're going to learn later that "Jaweh" means "God." In the Bible, God names himself "Yahweh," which apparently is approximately Hebrew for "I am who am."

Whether Jaweh is supposed to be Yahweh, however, I'm not really sure.





SD Snatcher is about to annoy me again.







And here it comes.







Oh come on!!! A lot of times in SD Snatcher, our reward for completing a dungeon is another goddamned dungeon. And in this case, it actually means partially revisiting an old dungeon!





And with that, Randam leaves. They didn't even bother giving him a reason this time, it's just like "Okay, well, we're leaving Player 1 alone now. Bye, NPC!"





Gilian: What makes you say that?
Metal: ... Uh...
Gilian: I mean we're both on the trail of Snatchers. It's entirely feasible we'll run into each other.
Metal: Let's just get going.

And now one of my favorite conversations in the game.





He's so fucking nonchalant about it!

"Did you find who you were looking for, sir?"
"Yes, but he's dead now."

I guess these walls are soundproof too, because no one seems perturbed by all the gunfire.



Gilian: Yep. The Junk Crew will be by to pick up the pieces. Well, time to go.



Just to confirm, you cannot fly to North Downtown. For whatever reason. We have to go back to Baran's... uh... "mansion".

But hey, we just avenged our friend Jan! Let's gloat to the other Junkers!



Gilian: You know, I treat women completely differently...
Mika: Well, Gilian, I'll take that at face value.
Metal: (Gilian! Remember! Jamie works here!)
Gilian: (Damn! That's right!) Uh, that is, I don't blow up their heads.
Mika: ...You're a strange man, Gilian.



Thanks, Chief! Maybe now that he's happy with us, we can check out...



Sorry, Chief.



You're welcome... Geoff. (Grumble.)





I decide to reward myself with a new weapon: The Greyhound.

Note the "4-shot capability". Actually most of the weapons from here on out are multi-shot. We'll see pictures here, but the basic idea is that you can now cover areas of the grid, rather than single spaces. A 4-shot weapon will bring up a 2x2 square and hit each of the 4 spots it covers. Every turn in battle only costs one "bullet," thankfully.

The only downside to this is that each shot is less powerful as its one-shot gun type equivalent. You get to cover more surface area, but you don't hit as hard with the multi-shot guns. Again, we'll go into more detail during actual combat, but this is going to change our battle dynamics a lot.

One last little annoyance is that there are also six-shot weapons and you have no idea if it will be a 2x3 rectangle or a 3x2 rectangle. Since there are enemies that are conducive for both, it's not a bad idea to get both 6-shot weapons.

Anyway, let's go see Jamie.



Sure thing hon. Don't be worried about me or anything. Let's see Mika again-



Wow. The heaps of praise are short lived.

Anyway, back to South Downtown.



Now THIS is what I'm talkin' about!

The 2x2 square lets you hit a bunch at once. I can lower his STR, ACC, take off some HP with the head, and get a shot at the antenna in only one turn! And it's legal!

And the best is that even if this asshole dodges, you'll absolutely hit something! (Unless it's very irregularly shaped or you've caused it to be by destroying parts of it.)

So to hell with you, Jetpack Joe! I'm going through this apartment!









Gilian: Those things give me the creeps.
Metal: Don't worry, Gilian. Most of them are not assembled.
Gilian: The one on the right is!
Metal: Well, it's deactivated.
Gilian: ...If you can determine that, why didn't you warn me about those two robots Purnet used as a trap?
Metal: ...Well... just try not to look at the robots as we walk by it, if it bothers you.



Now this uh... thing behind where Purnet was is open. I really don't know what it is, but let's enter it because that's what we do in RPGs.

It leads to...



More dungeon! It's an underground tunnel from North Downtown to South Downtown.

And now, an intermission: Let's learn about Slowbeef and RPGs. I am not good at RPGs. In fact, I kinda like it when my weapons seller says "You want the red sword that has a number 16 associated with it? Can't afford it? Well, buy the cheaper blue sword, go kill something easy for awhile and come back when you can afford it."

When you start saying things like, "Well, yeah, that sword is really strong and hits for a range of like 3-30, but it's two handed. This means you can't use a shield so your defense rating is affected, too. Also, that shield was decreasing a chance of critical hit. Wait, you're not a half-elf? Oh. Well, then it actually hits at a range of 6-24," it's usually at this point I start looking around for a copy of Gradius or something. I'm not saying this for the sake of my reputation - I think when I decided to LP a chibi anime game, I checked my coolness at the door. But my point is that I don't really know shit when it comes to RPGs.

So when I say "SD Snatcher is pretty fucking unbalanced at times," you know how you can tell it really must be? Because I noticed.

Case in point, our first enemy in this new dungeon...



El Molestadore! This guy was tough as nails when he was a boss. Without a hostage, though? Well, he's a little annoying because he has high stats. But for some strange reason, when you kill him:



You get nearly 2 1/2 times the XP that you did when he was a boss! Watch my white experience meter.



Holy eff. Nearly a level after a single enemy. Of course, some of you might be thinking I'm simply underleveled, but explain this...



Meet Catch That Bot! (I loved that name.) Catch is easy. He's not very powerful at all, and none of his stats are that high. He also gives out...



Less than a third of the experience that El Molestadore does. He's sort of a gnat in the dungeon. That said, he will use Bio-Weapons on you occasionally, so that's a little more annoying.



But that's okay, because you can still use your prescription medication found in a cave, as long as you use Newtriz to neutra- newtralize it.



Deeper in the tunnels, we find...





RC Pro AM!



Who - goddamn it - fires four rockets per turn. Again, they usually miss and don't hurt that much when they do connect, but damn if they're not a pain in the ass because you have to wait a bit every time they attack. It sucks.

The good news is...



Like Catch That Bot, RC Pro AM goes down really easy as well.



There's a northwest exit to this dungeon that leads to...





More freakin' robots we've seen from the apartment! I just ran by them to get to..





Joy Divsion! If, unlike me, you didn't gain about five levels in the dungeon because of the obscene amount of XP El Molestadore gives out, you can stock up on supplies here, and grind until you do.





I think that about does it. Coming up... we get out of the tunnels and find...

A cult that worships Snatchers?!