Part 1: Chapter One: I Heart Island

This strange old man who is very obviously thrilled to see us is Uncle Save. As his name implies, he can transform into a 500-foot tall dragon and breathe fire on your enemies.

Uncle Save: I know you're here daily. Do you like my books that much? If you want, feel free to read any of the books from the book case.

*Ray grabs a book*

Uncle Save: I see...you picked that book. I guess you like adventures. That's the most exciting adventure story I've ever had and wrote about! I've found the best friends in my life through that adventure. Yes, they really were our "Stars of Hope"...



So apparently the entire game is actually a story written by an old man living by himself in order to attract young boy-nevermind, I'm not going to go down that route.



Since the official name is Ray, that's the name I'll use. Yes, I'm boring like that.



The game opens in the midst of a bloody battlefield with thousands lying dead-I mean it opens with the main character just getting out of bed.



This will be helpful.



Mom: It looks like it's going to be a nice day today. Are you still searching for the Crest of the Stars? That crest was your father's. It is very precious to you. I hope you find it.

Gotta love the way things are exposited in this game.

Mom: Be very careful! We have had many earthquakes on this island lately on the island.

Oh boy, you know what that means. *spoiler alert* The place is going to be destroyed in the time it takes to cook a Hot Pocket.

Mom: The earthquakes have caused many wild animals to inhabit this island.

Wait, how does that make sense?



It's not a plum, but a plum-plum. What's the difference? I don't know. It restores your health. That's all that matters.



Time to head out. The locals provide snippets of info and one of them even gives us another Plum-Plum.



The overworld, as you might expect, contains access to other towns, dungeons, and random encounters with monsters. Here we only face mere Slimes, Hedgehogs, and Pig Men, but the monsters get progressively stronger as we go through the game. Just across is the town of Likado.





Hey thanks! It's not like there was a text box or anything previously to tell me that!



Wouldn't it be awesome if people in real life put big signs up outside their houses with pictures of themselves?



Gee, this looks kind of familiar.



Uncle Save: Will you tell me about your adventure? [->Yes No]

Remember kids, whenever you're in need of help, always look for a shabbily-dressed, unshaven old man.



Any bed you find can be slept in to restore your health. However, your MP won't be restored. Only by paying for a room at an Inn will restore both your HP and MP. Yes, it doesn't make any sense. You're going to have to get used to seeing that statement a lot here.



Well, I probably should introduce the menu. Most of it is hopefully self-explanatory. MAG lets you use certain spells out of battle (such as healing), you can look at/use items and equipment, look at stats, and SET changes the button configuration. So what does Swap do?



Oh, bollocks. But not to worry. All will be revealed in time...

So now we exit the House of Save.



Oh, not much. Just going to look for-



Hey, YOU asked ME.

Inside another house, we find a very important fellow.



David: My name is David of Kustera. Your father was the great Aqutallion. Ray! Homncruse's evil power is increasing. Our world will be consumed by darkness if he is not stopped. You must seek out the Crest of Stars soon. Then you can be called "Aqutallion Warrior".

OK, what's the deal with the quote marks? You know that's usually never a good thing when quote marks randomly appear around a word, right?

David: *ahem* As I was saying, only when you become the Aqutallion will you be able to defeat Homncruse. The Crest of Stars is located somewhere in the mountain. Hurry! Ray hurry!

I'm hurrying! Out the door, that is.



Guy: I've heard that he is the evil monster that is trying to rule our world.

And have you seen those pants? Talk about zero fashion sense.







What the hell are these people on?



Most towns contain item and weapon shops. It's important to keep yourself stocked up with healing items and armed with the latest weapons and armor.



...but since we're flat broke we can't buy diddly-shit.



Help you...do what exactly? Calm them down? Shoo them out? Well, this is a video game, so the default solution is to kill them.





Aww they're so cute and cuddly I just wanna-



guh?

A weird tune plays and the music gets creepy.



You wear a disguise to look like kitty guys, but you're not a cat, you're a Cat Boo.



Battle sequences are pretty straightforward. Since we're low-leveled right now, we don't have much in the way of magic or special techniques, so we just keep slashing him until he dies. We're rewarded with 16 exp, 6 gold, and a level gain, which puts us at an impressive 2.



Heh, I actually kind of like this. It's like he was rushing to think of something intimidating to say in the seconds before his death, but this is all he could come up with. I know it's probably not what the translator was going for, but hey, broken clock.





Oh yeah, our mom isn't really our mom. Also notice "past" instead of "passed". This is barely the tip of the iceberg.

After leaving the house and talking to another dude who tells us that the volcano is active (dun-dun-dun), we set out to explore the rest of the island.





A secret tunnel leads us to...



Stepping on the golden tile transports us to a strange cloudy dimension where a certain man has been waiting for us.



Man: My son...Ray...

Gasp!

Ray's father: Your task is to become an Aqutallion and beat Homncruse Ruler of Darkness. Fight Ray!

After giving his comma-less spiel, daddy sends us back to the shrine, and bestows upon us...





*cue victorious jingle*

David then shows up.

David: Finally, you are "Pennon".

Again with the quotation marks! Why always the quotation marks?

David: *throws brick* This is the first step to become the saint warrior of Aqutallion. Even though you are "Pennon", you are still a kid. Whenever you get into trouble, feel free to call us for help at anytime. We Kustera can switch and fight for you at anytime. First, go destroy the Homncruse follower who lives in Jeep Volcano. Jeep Volcano has an entrance in the nearby mountain. Let's fight together until we destroy Homncruse.





...and immediately turns into a tent. David doesn't fight with us, per se. As he is Kustera and we are Aqutallion, David actually leads his own separate party that we can "swap" (great, he's got me doing it now) with at any time. There are certain points that only Kustera can access and certain items that only they can get, and likewise for the main party. It's actually pretty nifty and a somewhat unique concept. Going north past the warp tile leads us to the Red Fountain



Why is it red? Dunno. What does it do? Dunno. For now, we have no business here.



Going into the other cluster of mountains leads us to the Jeep Volcano. Why can't we just go directly into the volcano itself? Remember what I said about things not making sense?



We encounter a group of 3 bats, and in a stroke of luck, we get the jump on them. I *think* monsters can get the jump on you too. Not totally sure. Been a while since I've played this game.



What light gate? I don't see it.

Man: Just past this volcano is the legendary gateway. There are 2 colors there, and only a chosen one can open it...are you that chosen one? Ho, ho, ho...

Thanks, Santa.

After going through this short tunnel, we emerge into the actual volcano.



Oh, HERE'S the light gate. But since it's green, we can't pass it. Only Kustera can. And appropriately, there are yellow gates that only the main party can pass. There's such a gate just around the corner, so we go through it.



The music's pretty ominous, which sets the mood perfectly. If there's one thing this game did right, it's the soundtrack. Link



That sure looks inviting.



OH GOD JESUS WHAT IS THAT THING KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT



*dramatic inhale*

In the next section, the music begins to pick up and sounds more tense. Link We go through the core of the volcano and find...



...a lab?



THIS is the vile villain we've been looking for! The one who seeks to destroy the island! We must put an end to his nefarious scheme! To arms!



...right after a power nap.



Dr. Gari: Feel the wrath of my latest invention as it wakes Jeep Volcano and destroys the island. The wishes of Master Homncruse will be fulfilled! I'll destroy you along with Heart Island.

Why is it that these bad guys never seem to fully think their plans through? He lives on the island too, and he'd be destroying himself along with it. Well, technically, he said it was Homncruse's wish to destroy the island, so maybe him being destroyed is part of the plan. But why would Homncruse want to dispose of him? If he's smart enough to build a doomsday device, then surely he's useful for other things as well. Hell, if Homncruse is supposedly all-powerful, why doesn't he just swoop down and kill Ray himself-I'm starting to overthink this, aren't I?





This used to make me and my friend crack up each time. Yes, we were immature punks. Dr. Gari is easily disposed of, and lies down, but not out.





Someone should probably stop him.

Dr. Gari: Ha, ha, ha! I flipped the explosion switch! Explosion...can't be...avoided...aha, ha, ha, ha...viva Homncruse!

Dr. Gari then vanishes in typical RPG villain death fashion.



OH FUCK



GOD DAMNIT

As Ray's body is wreathed in flames, he has not a minute to say goodbye to his friends and family. The island is destroyed, taking everyone with it. We have failed. Homncruse is victorious. The world shall be forever plunged into darkness and despair.

GAME OVER







Huh?



Like, totally, dude.

This guy with the awesome sunglasses is Bosen, another fighter in the war against Homncruse. And an avid patron of 80's nightclubs.

Bosen: My name is Bosen. I rescued you guys in the nick of time. Your father has been destroyed by Homncruse. Don't forget that name!

Well, we've only heard it about a million times by now.

Bosen: You are destined to fight him one day...



The plane drops us off at a place called Old Hill. For now, it's all we have.



Bosen: Find them and fight together. Also, find the 11 Kusteras who help Aqutallion. When in trouble, they will fight for you. Gather all in this land and build a town. Work with others and destroy Homncruse!

This is the other cool aspect of this game. You can build and maintain your own town. For now it's just a run-down shrine in the middle of nowhere, but as we gather tenants, it will grow. There's a similar concept in another SNES RPG which happens to be one of my favorite ones of all time: Breath of Fire 2.



Hey, I didn't see you on the plane. Probably clutching to the landing gear.

Uncle Save: It appears as though no one at Likado remains. Are you going to remain here?

Actually yeah, this whole "defeat Homncruse" thing sounds like kind of a pain in the ass. I figure I'd just settle down here. Maybe start up my own freelance IT business. There's still a pretty strong market for that.


...Okay, fine.

Uncle Save: By the way, do you want to record your adventure so far? ->Yes No Are you still going on with your adventures? Yes ->No



To Be Continued