Part 19: Chapter XIII. The Hook Up

Chapter XIII. The Hook Up

Erica always had a thing for Brett. So I decided to hook them up. I hadn't seen Brett all week, but he invited me to the hot tub to talk. What better time than now to set them up?



Oh, Brett was so sil-



Humph. Hadn't quite expected that.



No thanks, this thing stinks.



So I gave it back to him.



Well...



I can't talk up Erica just yet!

Erica is so awesome...



Later.

And then he'd leave!

You're so cute, fishing in the hot tub...



At least he didn't leave there.

I'm sorry we haven't hung out in so long.



Brett was so understanding.



It's not okay. I've been a bad friend.



Wow. Uh... thanks, Brett.



I couldn't say work...

I've just been so busy with work.



I gotta go.

And then he'd leave!

I've just been so busy... saving peoples' lives.



Well..



Old Man Riley.



Well, of course he's...



He's a fisherman.





Of course.

So he gave it to me...



I guess I should just start the conversation over! Only now that I'd done that, I could talk about other stuff...

Erica is so awesome...



Er...



She'll make out with you.



Well, that led nowhere.



The OP has now been updated with a Triangle of Brettface.

She's really smart.



Aw, Brett. What a jerk.



She just gets nervous.





She's so smart, her brain is moving at a pace no physical being can keep up with.



Now, this brought me back to my earlier point:



She's really cute.



What a idiot!



Platypusi are cute.



Good question.



She is cute.



Well... she...



She has a wonderful smile.



You're so cute, fishing in the hot tub.





You're the coolest guy on the mountain.



You are.

There's no other options in this.

Am not.
You are.
Nope.
You are.
Fine, I am!
Thank you.

You're the sweetest guy on the mountain.





You're the first boy I've ever kissed.
Okay, okay, I get it.



I don't know...



Let's make a deal.
What'd you have in mind?



Let's make a trade.
What for what?

I could trade him my BFF necklace... but I decided to give him my hairbrush in exchange for his fish.



Now fortunately--

Intermission. So, here's something fun I found out the hard way about this stage. I've put up with a lot, but this... this took the cake.



I lost this stage because I didn't give him Erica's phone number at the very beginning. And when you do, Brett asks why you gave it to him, emphatically refuses to call it, and it drops you right back to what you were talking about before without any segue.

This means to complete the stage, your beginning conversation actually has to be:



I'm sorry we haven't hung out in so long.



Here, let me give you Erica's number.
Why?
Use Item > Erica's Number
What's this for?
So you can go out with her, silly.
No, I don't think so.
Here, have it.
You already gave it to me.



It's not okay, I've been a bad friend.

Which leads back to what we were voting on in the thread. I know the game is retarded, I know this is not news. But this is really just out and out nonsensical, and I don't know how anyone would even consider this a proper solution to anything.

But it really is. End Intermission.

Now, fortunately, I'd remembered to give Brett Erica's number for no reason at all at the beginning. Which was good, because I obviously couldn't just call Brett later and give it to him - or have him just meet all of us there, since it was a double date. That'd be crazy!

So, having completed that, I felt pretty good about myself.



I even had Brett make me a Photoshop to commemorate it.



To get ready for my double date, I decided to buy myself either shoes, a BFF necklace, or chocolate. It didn't really matter as these were items I already had except the chocolate, so I got the chocolate.

As I walked away, I wondered about other ways the conversation could have gone.

If I'd kept the fish from the beginning...



I'll do something extra special for you.



Oh yeah. There was no way this was a sexual-seeming situation that would turn out to be nothing of the sort!



I'm sure you do.



I've been waiting my whole life for this.
Would you like me to dim the lights?
I prefer to see what I'm doing.
I like the way you think.
You're the only person in the world I'd want to do this with.



So I'd fillet the fish and he let me keep his pocket knife.

Of course, if I'd said make out...



And if I'd suggested just getting it over with...

I don't think you're taking this very seriously...

Haha. Oh Brett.

Incidentally, I could probably have gone on more about Old Man Riley...

Who's that?



Good idea!



No, I guess I would have to go with...

We will... just not right now...
Awwww....

Man, I had an active imagination!

Let's switch up the pitch a little. If there's a conversational path you'd like to see me explore, let me know. (I have to redo this portion anyway.)

I decided to talk to Conor first.



Right... okay, that was random.



Shut up, big head.



Ha! In you fac-



Me? A dwarf nose? I couldn't even think of how to respond to it...



No.



Phew. Crisis averted.

I hate Brett. Why do you always hang out with him?




I need you to lay off Brett.
Why?



Because I need you to.
He started it.
I need you to be the bigger man here.
Fine.

So that... uh... other potential crisis averted, I went to talk to Brett.

You should talk to Erica.



Jesus, do I have to spoon-feed these people?



Flirt with her.



Hey Erica.




It was a good thing I decided to smooth things over before ordering... if I hadn't...

Let's order.



Whatever, big head.



And after that, if things went wrong...



No, I couldn't let that happen.

I guess I could slut things up a bit... when Conor wanted to know why to lay off Brett...

I'll make it worth your while.



I guess it didn't matter.

The point was now I had to coach Brett through it. I told him to flirt with her and compliment her on her...

Chest.



I'd start to cry, as I'm wont to do.



And then...



A coma! AND a double-date distater. I couldn't let that happen.

Eyes.
Eyes.



Erica.
So, Brett was talking to me.



Yeah, don't repeat that to anyone, okay?
Okay.
You should talk to him.



I don't know. Make it up as you go along. You can do it.
Uhm, okay... Hey Brett?
Yes, Erica?
Ummm... ahhhhhhhhhh!

Erica would run out!



Thanks, Becks.

I guess I'd have to tell her what to say...

And with that, it was time to play Cyrano de Bergerac with Erica.

'Hey there.'
Hey there.
Hey...



'You look nice tonight.'
You look nice tonight.



Hmmm... I don't know if Erica should lay it on too thick...



'I think I'll have the trout.'



What?
Uhm.




Huh?
Nothing.



Isn't Becky the most awesomest?





Hahahaha!



Uh...




I was wondering why he'd brought a bucket to dinner.

Fine.
How big is it?

Then I went to put the bucket on his head.



It's just right.
I knew it!
Let's order.
Good, I'm starving. I'll have the chicken.
Good choice, I think I'll have the same thing.
Becky, do you think I should have the soup?



I... why was I suddenly so apprehensive about this? Maybe it was because they were dancing, which was wholly inappropriate for a classier restaurant like this.



Still, I couldn't help but feel odd about it...