Part 2: I've Got The Urge

Chapter 2: I've Got The Urge


(He's just being courteous, actually he thinks it's a dump and a half)




Now I think that this part is supposed to show some sort of characterization, but the translation just makes it come off as though both Billy and her guest are cloistered, socially awkward goons.

Oh, speaking of her guest,

he temporarily joins the party so we can actually name him now. Even if the whole of "Tallgeese" doesn't fit.


He also comes with this special attack that we will never actually get to use.


















... Wait a second.

Federal army?

Ahem. Anyway, let's show him around the village, shall we?

Oh, no shit.




Nah, he's too much of a whiteknight to be anyone's boyfriend.


"so lovey-dovey that it is embarrassing just watching them."


They also have some rose petals on the second floor. I do like this little touch that infers a glimpse into the residents' private lives, but this is pretty much the only one of two treasures in the entire game where the dev team actually contextually thought about what went into a treasure box.

Both times, it's done really well and is very amusing, so there's a lot of wasted potential here.

Next: we do some shopping, I guess.












"Oh. ... Oh."


Anyway, let's buy some equipment since we're here.

Tallgeese
Rank and Affiliation: Ensign, Earth Federation
Weapon: Standard-issue laser gun
Body Armor: Advanced Kevlar weave
Lower Body: fucking barefoot


"Well yeah I mean obviously he has a job come on"


Anyway, for future reference, take a quick glance at that painting, will you?


Fortunately, Arlia really is a one-horse town, and we're almost done with this not-even-a-tutorial crap.

On the other hand, I love this reflection effect, even if upon closer examination of the reflection of the house, you realize that physics does not work that way.


"talks so fucking much you will want to kill him like five seconds after meeting him."

I wish I was kidding.


So at this point, if we'd chosen to play as Tallgeese, Billy would've told us to wait outside, and we would've waited. FOREVER.

The trick, you see, is to not listen to her at all and go straight inside.


But since we're playing as Billy, we get to see what happens while Tallgeese is just chillin'.


"There's a man with a gun outside and he is following me everywhere"




You asked, so I delivered. I did not cut anything out between the last three screens. This game just seriously has no sense of conversational progression.


... So if a dude has come to save you all, how exactly is this a terrible thing...?




"Billy, you say that about every boy you meet. Do we need to put you on [the pill]?"












"Mother, I know what you are thinking. You are not stealing another one of my [Warriors of Light]."

So now, you can go around asking NPCs where Tallgeese went, like this:


Or you can just find him hanging around outside like this:



... What do I have to be so ready for that I get a Yes/No option?


"Here, you get the goat blood while I tie Mr. Tallgeese over there up"
"Yes, mother"


:ANIME:


For eating. Or is Billy anorexic?




In a brilliant design decision, the game brings up this text and makes you sit around for a real hour. I timed it.




"Man, I love this planet. Women know their place."

On the other hand, if you're playing as Tallgeese, you seriously have to wait around for like ten minutes.


"You know how the Mayor likes young men."
"Mother!"








Clearly, Mayor Regis is entirely unimpressed.

In a world where the only one who believes her is her own self, BILLY must fight for JUSTICE and TRUTH and all that OTHER FAGGOT SHIT because ain't nobody else gonna do it. And she does it all in the next exciting episode of LET'S PLAY STAR OCEAN 2!

actually no there's just more talking and also basement rape