Part 6

Man, those guys are yappy.


Not to be confused with the Vampire.


Pat, the Elderly Ninja. That could work as a TV series.

Additionally; I now have one of the most fearsome weapons in the game:



A bucket. Don't worry, you will see it in action eventually.


HOW DID YOU KNOW MY-oh right, the big sign I put up.



Uh... Okay.





vs.


Pat is pretty spry for an old man.


Ahh, so that's his secret. Despite what their name might lead you to think, Speed Gems boost your speed. Also, I somehow made the game kill him through a door.



I guess I'd better take a look, then. Beats trying to catch another carpenter.



Ah, here's the problem: I have an old man infestation. Pat probably laid some eggs.





I seriously have no fucking clue what just happened.


HEY! DIDN'T YOU READ THE SIGN?



Who indeed









Don't look at me. I don't know why evil jewelry is laying around in my fireplace. I just live here.


I'm starting to miss Scuba.


That dirty cunt was lying! There's no ring in here, just fire. Lots of fire.




That's super.


Hi Coolbou I'm Norman.


I... didn't say I was?


This woman must be insane.


Her insanity gives her the strength of FIVE HUNDRED MEN!


Oh come on! How could I not look when you bend over like that? I'm only human... Well I used to be, anyway.





You mean the very same fire I already checked and you presumably took the ring out of before I got there?



Jesus, lady. It's a solid metal and stone object, not something you find in a crackerjack box.


Oh what now?!



No. Stop right there. Not another fucking word, you hear me? I have HAD IT with people coming in my house and babbling crazy shit then exploding for today.




All right, then. That's actually logical at this point.


Wait, what?


HEY DON'T YOU FLY THROUGH THE CEILING ON ME YOU EXPLAIN WHAT THE FUCK 'COAX ONE'S GREED' MEANS RIGHT FUCKING NOW!


I should have stayed dead.