Part 138

"Nii-san......! I know you're up. You have to get your examination, so why did you lock the door!?"
Bam bam. She knocks harder.
Akiha frantically calls me from outside in a bitter voice.
"Please open the door already! You haven't had your evening IV, do you want to die!?"

"Yes."

The pounding on the door doesn't stop.
...... That's only natural.
It's not good for Akiha if I shut myself in this room like this.
As long as I'm doing this--Akiha will not be able to kill me.

"Nii-san......!? Hey, are you listening to me, Nii-san......!?"
Bam, Bam.
...... I don't really mind the knocking, but I cannot stand having to listen to her voice.

"Shut--up............!!"

"Eh------?"
I hear her gasp from the other side of the door.

"Shut... up? ...... Nii-san, I am only worrying about you---"
"...... I don't care. I'm not coming out. If you're really worried about me, then just go away."



"Wha--"

"Since when did you start listening to Evanescence!?"

"Do you get it? I'm not ever coming out. I won't--let you--kill me......!"
Thud. I hit the door.
...... The other side of the door becomes a frozen silence.

--And after that...

"...... Nii-san, just what do you mean? Who told you I would kill you?"
"...... Just go away......! I'm not a killer, I'm still sane......!"

Saying it out loud doesn't mean it's true.

"I can't believe it----Nii-san, you are already pulled in this much?"
Her words are filled with surprise.
I sense her step back from the door.

"...... I understand. Nii-san, you are exhausted right now, so I will come back and see you later."
"--Shut up! I won't let you or anyone else in this room......!"
"...... Nii-san. I will listen to your words today, but tomorrow, I will make you listen to me.
Leaving you by yourself for one day is dangerous enough; I simply cannot leave you alone for two days, otherwise you will surely die. Please wait for just one more day, Nii-san."
I hear her footsteps recede.

"Nobody can kill me but myself!"

Music: stop

...... Knock, knock knock, knock.
...... Knock, knock knock, knock.
...... Knock, knock knock, knock.
...... Knock, knock knock, knock.
...... Knock, knock knock, knock.
...... Knock, knock knock, knock.
...... Knock, knock knock, knock.
...... Knock, knock knock, knock.
...... Knock, knock knock, knock.

...... Knock, knock knock, knock.

----The night is over.

A terrible silence.
I can't even hear the wheezing of my breathing.

...... Knock, knock knock, knock.

"--------"
My body doesn't even twitch or move at all.
My mind has completely stopped as well.
I bet if I look at myself in the mirror, I would look like a puppet with its strings cut.

...... Knock, knock knock, knock.

", ........., ........."
I get back my rhythm, and I can continue breathing.
"---------"
Being by myself all night caused my body to become really weak.
My vision is really blurry.
The air touching my skin is painful.
My organs are so screwed up now that I can't breathe unless I concentrate.

...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.
...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.
...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.
...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.
...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.
...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.
...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.
...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.

"Shiki-sama, are you awake......?"
Hisui's voice.
...... How many times is this? Hisui really doesn't grow tired of this at all.
"You are awake, are you not? If that is the case, then please at least eat."
"...... No. I won't eat what any of you give me."
I won't eat anything.
I can't trust anything that comes from this house.
Food. Water. Medicine.
It seems like everything is a poison to kill me.

"Can't open the door. Door knob is poisoned. Don't want to die."

"I showed her already... surely she wouldn't dare try to kill me after that."

"........."
But, that is just a fantasy.
Hisui tried to lock me in this room.
Like right now, she came to my room to look after me, keeping me trapped in this room.

If there could be a growing to match the growing , this path would be complete.

"----Ha, ah."
...... This is no good.
I know my thoughts are just paranoia.
But my mind won't return to normal.

...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.
...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.
...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.
...... Knock,Knock Knock, Knock.

My mind is foggy and my body pulses with pain.
My throat is so dry that it feels like I will die if I don't drink water.
...... In spite of all that, I still keep the door locked.

...... Yet again, the knocking continues.

Her presence recedes.

...... We repeat this cycle countless times.

"Ha--ah, g--"
...... Pain.
The hunger is nothing.
But thirst is killing my burning body.
"------------"
...... Just what am I doing?
Lying crumbled against the wall, hugging my broken body.

The closed window, the locked door.
"----------"
...... Come to think of it, a long time ago...
It feels like something like this happened before too.

----That was...
How long ago was that?

Music: play track 7

"SHIKI-chan, let's play. You'll get moldy if you stay in one place like that."
I tell her it's none of her business and make her go away day after day.

Music: stop

Music: play track 7

"Why won't you come outside?"
I can't go outside. Everyone in the mansion, they all see me as the enemy.

Even as a young child, Shiki worked diligently on developing his paranoia.

"That's not true. Everyone wants to like you, SHIKI-chan."
But I can't believe her.
My own father believed that, and was killed by Tohno Makihisa.

"...... I see. No wonder you can't trust anyone."
That's right. So it's easier for me to be alone.
"But, you will just be yourself all the time. Being by yourself is no fun."
I don't care. This is better than getting killed.
Better than being tricked.
It's better to be alone and trick myself instead of dying.

"Geez. I understand, so you can ***** me. Then you can come outside, right?"

Yeah, I thought it, too. Especially the second part. Alternatively, blanking out that one word probably seems much less suggestive in Japanese. At least I hope.

Her words then.
I... can't remember exactly what they were.
With her voice, that girl said I could do what----?

She said you could ***** her. Geez, seven year olds just don't have any decency anymore. She should at least wait for the first date.

Music: stop

"...............?"
I don't hear her footsteps.
She doesn't seem to have walked away.
"............ Hisui?"
There is nothing but silence on the other side of the door.
Hisui is just standing quietly on the other side.

Time passes.
Hisui's presence doesn't move. All she does is wait by the door.

"...... Why will you not come outside, Shiki-sama?"
...... That's obvious.
Since I can't trust anyone anymore, I'm being by myself.
Neither Akiha nor Kohaku, not even I can be trusted, so I can't do anything but lock myself away.

You know the drill by now. , , and more

...... Yeah, I finally realize it.
The thing with Akiha might really be a trivial thing.
I am trying to be alone so that I can lock myself up, as I might be the killer.

"...... Hisui. Just go away. It's easier for me to be by myself. This way I won't be a burden to anyone."
"That is a lie. That... that is not fun at all. Shiki-sama, you are telling a lie......!"
...... Her voice actually sounds a little angry.

"Shiki-sama. If you say you cannot believe in anyone, please believe in me!
So please, listen to me for just now......!"
...... Her voice... she sounds like she is crying.



She must be really angry as she's not making any sense.
"You can believe in me"? That's backwards.
Normally, I have to say "I believe in you."

"......... Geez........."
That's just absurd.
I thought the only one who'd make that kind of ridiculous argument was that one girl.

Music: play track 7

She sounds like she's crying.
The tone is different, but it feels similar to what that girl told me back then.

"Will you resist again......!? Shiki-sama, you are really in danger like this......!
Why--why are you acting like back then......! You promised that when you came back, you would play with everyone, so why......!"

The crying voice of a young girl.
"Ah............"
I start to remember a little.
That's right. Back then, before I was taken to the hospital, I made that small promise.
I thought that I would go back to the mansion when I healed, so I just said it without thinking too much.

"Shiki-sama---I do not want to lose you right before my eyes, just like before......! So please...... please, open the door...... Shi, ki--"
The pounding against the door stops.
It seems Hisui has crumbled to the ground in tears.

Music: play track 8

"Hisui......!"
Even though I shouldn't have any strength left, I somehow manage to stand.
Every time I move, I feel like fainting.
But the pain is of no concern right now.

----Hisui.
Hisui.
Hisui, Hisui, Hisui, Hisui----!

I drag myself to the door and place my hand on the lock.
"...... Yo...... u"
My numb fingers don't move as I tell them to, and the lock is difficult to turn.

The lock finally clinks loose.
The door opens.
In front of me, I see the figure of Hisui.

This is just so cute...

"---Hisui. Are you that girl?"
".................."
Hisui doesn't answer.
Her silence isn't disagreement, but agreement.

"Why? ----I thought she was Kohaku-san. You even told me yesterday that you were the child in the mansion."
"...... Shiki-sama. That was not me. I think Nee-san was helping you out since you were so weak."
"Eh----"

----In other words...... The Hisui that I saw yesterday... was really--Kohaku-san......?

But that means... with the... and then they...

"...... Then Hisui? You're the one who played with us when we were kids, and Kohaku-san is---the one who was always in the mansion?"
"............"
"Why......? I don't understand. Just why are the two of you acting like you traded places?"
"...... We never intended to deceive you. I think I became calmer after you were adopted by the Arima family.
Nee-san tried to cheer me up by acting very happy, and then, we gradually traded our roles."

"...... But, I never should have done that. Since I took you out into the garden, you had the accident."
I---all I could do was watch in fear as you were killed before my eyes. All I could do was stare at your blood-soaked body. I couldn't even cry, or call for help.
...... Since that time, I was unable to understand myself. No matter how I tried, I could not remember how I acted, or how I smiled."

"...... When you were dying, I could not do anything. I could only watch. It was as if I was just a doll.
So---I thought... that maybe it would be better if I was just a doll. Maybe I put a curse on myself.
Before I knew it, I became silent just like Nee-san. ...... Nee-san took my place, doing the work I could not do, smiling because I could not."

"...... Wait, Hisui. What you're saying, I don't really---"
Understand, is what I wanted to say.
"What do you mean I almost died? You know about that accident eight years ago?"
"...... Yes. You were not injured from a traffic accident. ...... In the courtyard of the mansion, you were killed."
"Wha----"

"Ah......"
I start feeling light-headed. All the strength drains from my legs and I start to fall---

"Shiki-sama......! Please, hold on......!"

...... In that instant,
Hisui wraps her arms around me to prevent me from falling.

""Ah----""
...... Her voice and mine overlap.
Hisui stands there, desperately holding on to me.
We look like we're embracing each other, and Hisui stands there trembling.

"............ Hisui."
I understand.
I understand that she doesn't like to come into contact with men.
Even now, her body is trembling all over.

"Hisui...... Finally, we meet again."
With my weak body, I embrace her close to me.
"Ah...... Shiki... sama......"
Her shaking doesn't stop.
But she does not refuse me and wraps her arms around my back.

"...... I'm sorry."
I don't know what I'm apologizing for.
I just feel like there's so many things I have to apologize to her for.
"...... Not at all. You do not need to apologize for anything, Shiki-sama."
Answering quietly, she takes me to my bed.

This part is like meets meets meets ... and it only gets better

It's another big update. This was the last choice on the path (sorta), so I'll be working on getting the ending up in pieces as I can.