Part 58

Chapter 58: Knights of Cydonia is Way Too Obvious To Be A Chapter Title, Part One



: How was the travel to Mars?

: It wasn't pleasant, I'm not going to lie. We all had to remain in our Power Suits for well over two days. We had to cram as many people into the Avenger as we could, which meant luxuries like personal space had to go.

: How did you pass the time? And how did you prevent cabin fever?

: Most of the soldiers were rookies, so we did a lot of talking about strategies, the mission, previous battles. Director Ulysses told us what we should expect. We'd land in the middle of the Sectoid's base and find the entrance to the lower levels where we'd find...something. Whatever it was that was controlling everything there. We also looked at the news reports that managed to transmit far enough for us to pick up. We knew that UFOs were everywhere, conducting mass abductions and infiltrations all over the world. We knew this was our last chance. And we tried to ask the Director what his "small step" words were going to be, but he kept shrugging off all questions about it. This was simply another mission to him, nothing more, and nothing less.



: There were no UFOs or any defenses on approach to the Cydonia region, but we knew that there would be enemies on the surface. I'm never going to forget this mission. I remember it like it was yesterday.

Bovines: Here we go guys, I'll go draw any fire from-





Bovines: Good Lord, there's Sectoids everywhere!



Bovines: One down, there's more out there!



Waddle Dee: Here, let me show you how to really deal with enemies. By blastering them!




Director Ulysses: Landing area is clear.








Director Ulysses: Sic Transit Gloria Mundi, men. We have a job to do, let's get to it.



Otto Zander: The area's not clear just yet, they're hiding in craters!



Raverrn: Nice shot Zander. Those pyramids surrounding us should might have the exit we're looking for. And there's a Cyberdisk nearby. Let's clear 'em out!



Bunnyofdoom: I missed the Cyberdisk. Sorry, I'm not really good with this plasma gun yet.



Tarantula: Yes, nailed it!



Tarantula: Keep spreading out, watch for shots from the pyramids!



Blowupologist: I'm going to set up my blaster point here. You're good where you are Ulysses?



Director Ulysses: Yeah. We need to spread out our men a bit. Those on the ship, stay there. Everyone else, get some room between you and the Avenger. Try and find cover!



Torlon: They're coming at us!



Torlon: BLAH AND FROM THE SIDES TOO!

Otto Zander: Torlon!



Torlon: GAH MY SUIT ISssssssss_sssssss...

Otto Zander: They shot Torlon! Man down!




Bovines: Oh fer-

Waddle Dee: Hey Bov-

Bovines: SHUT UP! YOU SHUT YOUR GODDAMN FUCKING MOUTH DEE. I SWEAR YOU'RE GOING TO BE THE VERY LAST X-COM TO DIE BEFORE WE WIN THIS. IT'S FATE.

Tarantula: Hey Bunny, what are you OH GOD NO!




Otto Zander: Oh God, not a grenade! He's already dead! Torlon's already dead....



Otto Zander: Wait, did he just...




Otto Zander: Wow. Ha! That Sectoid just blew itself up!



Jean Maury: Le Lapin!

Director Ulysses: Kill Bunny, kill anyone who's turned, we can't risk losing higher psi-strength people!



KGargly: I got him, he's down.



Waddle Dee: Ulysses, Blowup, start firing on empty patches of land, I've killed a couple Cyberdisks that way already!



Otto Zander: Whoa! Help me, Sectoid in this pyramid!

Linall: On it!



Linall: Hey, I'm starting to get pretty good at this!



hypern: wow, i can't beleive it! were raelly on Nars. we really-

: Zander. Is this mission particularly difficult to remember? Was the loss of soldiers traumatic for you?

: No, I mean it wasn't fun, but I thought I was dealing with it very professionally.

: There are clear errors in some of the details of your memory. Possible signs of PTSD.

: Um...sorry? I'll just try to focus more, and continue on.



Bovines: Fucking tank keeps getting blown up. Fucking Dee keeps rubbing it in my face. I'm a million miles from goddamn home picking weapons off the dead. This can't get any fucking worse.



Director Ulysses: Blindfire has kicked up a dust screen. This should be able to help you guys get to the pyramids and find the entrance to the underlevels.



Blowupologist: Second round incoming!



Blowupologist: Yeah, large explosions sure are a lot more fun out in the field, instead of in the middle of my lab.



W.T. Fuguyz: WHOA FUG-AAAAHHhhh..... _{take care...of my cat...she has a glandular...problem....}



Otto Zander: AH! Shit!

: This was when you suffered a severe head injury.

: No, no, no, it wasn't that bad. The plasma didn't penetrate my helmet, but the sheer force of impact knocked me for a loop. But only for a second.



Prowler: We're losing men left and right! Where the hell are those blasts coming from!?



Prowler: SHIIIII-IIIT!!!



Waddle Dee: One Sectoid? You're it? God damn, how many people have you killed so far? You will PAY! Why I'm going to-



Bovines: *gasp* My kill-stealing alarm is going off! Okay Bovie, you missed with an automated guided blaster bomb last time, so now you have to take careful aim. Hold your breath...



Bovines: FUCKING BULLSEYE. SUCK IT, DEE!



Cooked Auto: You look okay Otto, no penetration on your helmet. You might have a concussion though. Maybe you should stay back in the Avenger.

Otto Zander: No man, I'm fine. These rookies need us fighting with them.




Blowupologist: Gargly, you finished checking that pyramid? Gargly, what are you doing? Gar-NO!!! GET AWAY!



Blowupologist: GARGggglllllluh.....



hypern: their's a sectiod in this doorway!



Jean Maury: Stand back hypern!



Jean Maury: Sectoid down. What was this building it was guarding?



Deadmeat Redux: Fuck, man! Everyone's dying...I've never felt so scared in my life, and I dropped my gun somewhere. Sorry guy, but I need this - oh hello!



Deadmeat Redux: Yeah, I'd rather have your gun.



Deadmeat Redux: Everyone, I've got Blowup's launcher. Call in a strike if you need it!



Otto Zander: You're on to something Jean, this is the way down! Pile in, let's get the hell away from the surface!



KGargly: Guys...where am I? What happened?

Death's Head: Gargles! They're psionically attacking you. Keep it together and get to the pyramid to the north. I know there's one inside!



hypern: i don't see any kind of obvious elelator.

Otto Zander: No, that's the one. The whole floor drops down. It's similar to alien technologies I've seen before.



*thud*

Bovines: Huh? GRENA-



Bovines: SHIT!


....


Bovines: You assholes will NOT kill me! I've survived a Chryssalid massacre! I've survived TWO base attacks! I've served in all three X-COM bases! It'll take more than a...than



Bovines: I'm..._invinci...



Waddle Dee: Bovines! No! I-I never got to tell you...



Deadmeat Redux: SHIT BOVINES! SOMEONE DO SOMETHING!



Death's Head: Gargles, that grenade came from here, I knew there was a Sectoid here!



KGargly: I'm going in. Promise you'll be right behind me.



KGargly: FUCK! HELP!



Cooked Auto: Got it! Be more careful entering building next time if you have no backup. Keep your finger on the trigger! If you know there aren't any XCOM soldiers behind the door, shoot first, ask questions later. That way you won't get jumped by aliens right on the other side of the door.



Cooked Auto: Finish this one off as soon as I say the word.



Waddle Dee: Tank's parked. Thanks for blowing a hole in the wall for me, Ulysses.



Waddle Dee: Guess it's time for me to grab the remotes and join you all.



Deadmeat Redux: WHY IS NO ONE HELPING ME?!



Deadmeat Redux: DIE ALIEN SCUM!



Deadmeat Redux: I DON'T WANT TO DIE ALONE OUT HERE!

KGargly, Death's Head: DEADMEAT, NO!!!





Waddle Dee: I've made it. Is this it?

Director Ulysses: There's really no one behind you? We all agreed you were going to be the last to join us.

Waddle Dee: Deadmeat's still out there, I'm sure of it!



Director Ulysses: We can't sit around waiting for him any longer. We need to go.



Director Ulysses: Stay focused, we're not done yet.

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