Part 5: Episode V: Fei Fong Wong and the Invasion of the Steel Giants
Episode V: Fei Fong Wong and the Invasion of the Steel Giants
"Thank you for such a delicious meal!"
"You're welcome. If you like my cooking that much, then I'd be happy to cook for you anytime, Fei! Oh, and the bread tasted really good because I used that egg you brought us."
So, since “invitation to dinner” translates in Fei thoughts to “gorge yourself on everything edible on the property”, Fei has gained a few pounds. For some reason you can alter all playable characters’ weight stats by eating certain foods during the course of the game. This does...absolutely nothing other than garnering a few comments from a NPC later on who can weight characters. Some will tell you that it raises/lowers stats and shit...but I’m pretty, pretty sure that’s a load of crap much like the RPS game’s “patterns”. Or that it's so negligible that it might as well not exist. So anyway, we can check everyone’s weight in the status screen. Here’s Fei before we traveled to the Uzuki household...
167.2 lbs. Fairly average weight. So, how much did he gain from that little egg snatching sidequest...?
Only a bit over twenty pounds. What? Did you think I was making jokes about Fei devouring everything that wasn’t nailed down and could be digested in Citan’s home?
“It does not exactly make me feel comfortable to have you handle such delicate instruments, I am afraid!" "... Where have I heard that line before!? That's alright by me... Well, see you tomorrow, doc! Good night, Yui, Midori!" "Good night. We're looking forward to tomorrow's wedding."
"..." ”Mommy, what are we gonna eat for breakfast...?” ”Hush! Don’t mention food again until he’s out the door...”Citan and Fei step outside...
"Yes, good night."Fei begins to walk back toward the village...
"Oh, Fei! Please be careful... Ah, I mean... the path is dangerous when it is so dark..." ”Doc, the path is a nightmare even in broad daylight...” “Yes...well... You did eat quite a bit...” "What's wrong, doc? There is nothing to worry about! Well, anyway, I'll see you tomorrow."
Fei wanders off back toward Lahan. Strangely, random battles do not seem to come out after dark on the mountain pass. However, a different form of trouble seems to present itself in the night skies...
Music: Knight of Fire (Homework assignment: Interpret what the hell they’re saying in this track.)
Citan comes running over yelling Fei’s name...
"So you saw them too! Judging by their shadows, they appear to be a group of Gears from our neighbor country, Kislev." "Those were... Gears...?"
”Metal...Gears...?” “Fei, now is not the time for your jo—“
"!! Oh no! They are headed directly for Lahan!" "The ones I just saw?" ”No, Fei... The other Gears waging war flying through the sky...” “So you’re saying it was those Gears of...war?” *groans* "Let us make haste!" "Right!"Fei and Citan run back to Lahan...
Well, this is a shocking turn of events. I’m going to be pissed if this scene too pulls out and turns out to be a finger painting by Midori.
Citan spots Alice and Timothy. He calls them over to him...
"Doctor Uzuki!? Fei!!"
"Doctor! They just came outta nowhere and landed right in our village...!" "I know. What on earth are they doing starting a battle here...!? Are you all okay?" "Yes! But it's Dan... We can't find him!!" "I'll go look one more time! Alice, go ahead and get out of the village." "No, Timothy, wait!! You, Alice and the rest of the villagers should evacuate to a safer location!" "Doc, you know I can't just leave Dan behind!" "Timothy..." "I understand how you feel, but leave the rest up to Fei and me! The primary thing you should be concerned with is your own safety... Timothy, your responsibility is to protect Alice!" ”Wait, me...?! Hold up, doc...” "...But..." "It's just as doc says. The two of you should get out of the village now! Don't worry about Dan. Knowing him, he has already evacuated and is waiting for you!" ”Look, just get to high ground and scan the horizon. In this lighting, you’ll be able to see that dome for miles.” "...I guess you're right... Okay! Alice, let's let Doctor Uzuki and Fei handle it from here!" "...Yes, okay. Thank you, Doctor! But, Fei... Please look out for Dan!" "Yeah, don't worry. If he still happens to be in the village, I'll be sure to save him!" ”I knew I could rely on you, Fei. You always were so strong and capable and da—“ “...” “Err...thank you, Fei.” "Now, both of you, hurry!!"Timothy and Alice run off out of town...
“Fei, please go around the village and guide the stragglers to a safe location!" ”Right... Unless it’s that RPS guy... That jerk is on his own...” “...Let us just say I shall look the other way for that one...” "Alright! But doc... You be careful, okay!!?" *nods* "You too, Fei!"Citan and Fei run in opposite directions into the flaming town...
Instead of making any manner of attempt to help the citizens of his village to flee from certain death, Fei is almost immediately mesmerized by the spectacle of giant robots duking it out.
However, while zoning out and enjoying the dakka brawl, he nearly gets blown up by a nearby explosion and crushed by a...
Oh...hey... This looks familiar... So familiar, in fact, that our hero’s intense concentration on the Gear pulls him into the Anime Zone™.
”Oh man, Fei... There’s a mecha suit in front of you and the pilot was killed... How many chances like this am I going to get to ride a giant rob—"
“Oh, dammit! Somebody beat me to it! I hate the kids in this town...”
But...that’s no ordinary kid...
As indicated by the ominous cross swinging in a void and shimmering in the light off camera.
”Okay... Mecha suit...”
“Dead pilot... Or... Whatever the heck they call Gear pilots. I bet they get a special name. Like “Runn—no, let’s focus, Fei... Dead pilot...”
“And...”
“...A creepy little kid that might just be in your mind...”
“Yep... I think I know how this works...”Fei hops over the corpse of the former pilot and enters the Gear...
"Huh... Fei!? Wait, Fei!!" "..." "Do not do this, Fei! You must not fight here...!!" ”Yeah, doc. I know... Real estate prices. Bad economy. I’ll be careful...”Fei ignores Citan’s pleas and enters the fray with his newly hijacked Gear...
Music: Steel Giant
Identified: Lamb, Ignas dialect No piloting exp. -> Easy Mode Set
Synchronizing input interface with pilot's normal reflex time
Warning to Pilot: C O M B A T M O D E About to enter combat! 1200 units of fuel left
Utilize Command Ring in upper left of screen to select ATTACK
then, triangle, square, and X buttons to commence auto-attack sequence.
Power and fuel usage differs with type of attack (button): Triangle – 10, Square – 20, X - 30 (CHARGE restores 30 fuel units)
An alert alarm sounds...
So, who’s up for some mecha suit battling?
Gear Battles are a bit of a different beast from On Foot fighting. Since this is only a tutorial battle, our options are fairly limited. But we can go over the basics.
Standard attacking is similar to on-foot battles, but eh...simplified. Gears cannot string together sweet combos quite like ground fighters can. We can only perform a weak, medium, or fierce auto-attack. Unlike ground battles, this is based on Fuel Consumption, not Stamina. Fuel does NOT replenish between rounds, or even between battles, for that matter. The only way to replenish fuel is via Defense/Charging, which gives us 30 units back. Or items we’ve yet to obtain.
So basically, Gear battles are based on resource management more than anything.
In this fight, we’re fine with just blowing forward with fierce attacks to karate kick uppity enemy Gears in the face. But, in future battles we’ll need to be a bit more strategic with how we go about attacking. Or stock up on good items. One of the two...
The two enemy combatants are “Musha Mk100” Gears. They’re you’re basic cannon fodder Gears just equipped with a mere machine gun pea shooter. They don’t even know kung-fu! As such, they both go down in a fierce attack or two.
Characters’ Ether attacks will also translate into Gear based techniques (which like their ground counterparts, draw from a separate
Anyhow, that’s our first and only battle of this sequence. Characters gain experience from Gear battles too. However...character level and stats does not correspond with Gears’ abilities. We will...get into that later...
After the battle, Fei quickly gets surrounded by back-up Gears. Seems the mecha Fei stole was their target. I suppose that would explain the dead pilot leaving an intact Gear... In any case, the rest of the Gears in the area now have Fei on their shit list.
This includes the boss Gear. You can tell he’s the boss because only squad leaders get to float down in their giant robots with their arms crossed smugly.
The rest of the Gears open fire on Fei and he’s forced into more battle in the middle of his burning home town. But, enough about giant robot battling. Let’s go see what Citan is up to...
Music: Tears of the Stars, Hearts of the People
“Oh no... This is not good! If 'he' awakens here..." ”...” “I am wasting good foreshadology talking to myself...”
“Doc!!”
Oh terrific... We go from an exciting giant robot brawl to an enormous giant redheaded balding kid’s drama.
Dan jumps out of Alice’s window... Hopefully he wasn’t raiding her panty drawer or something equally creepy. I wouldn’t put it past that little imp.
“Do you not know how worried Alice and Timothy are!?" "I'm sorry Doctor Uzuki! I got out of the village earlier, but I came back... I just couldn't bear to think of leaving my sister's wedding dress behind here..." "You returned to save your sister's wedding dress...!? Heh... You are such a sentimental little boy...!" <Amazingly foolish, but his head—err...HEART is in the right place...> "Let us evacuate to a safer spot while Fei has their attention!"
"It appears that they are after that Gear Fei is in..." "...!? Fei's... inside that monster!?" ”...Does this really surprise you?” “...” “...I guess not.”
"... Fei...?" "Come on now, Dan! We had better get away from here." “Dan!!”Timothy runs back into town...
”Fei was right about going up on the hill and looking for a reflection from your he—Err... I’m so relieved!”
This is going to end well...
“Wait!! Don’t shoot!!”
A couple more Gears move in the way to bar Fei’s path. This is from the dark ages of the PSX RPG where in-battle map movement with a thing of high fantasy.
Boss Bot gives Fei the “fuck you” arm gesture before returning to his smug arms-crossed pose.
And one of his subordinates opens fire on poor meathead Timothy.
Welp. I guess the wedding is off. I suppose that’s one way for Fei and Alice to hook up...
Fei...does not exactly take well to his best friend getting riddled with bullets in front of him...
Uhh... Well, that was...something... The ominous swinging cross pendant’s chain breaks and falls into the void. And Fei...
That horrified shriek seems to have damaged his hair conditioner. Do you know how much product it takes to keep that giant hair curl he has like that...?
In either case, Fei focuses his grief, rage, creepy flashbacks, and new hair style into powering up his Gear to unleash a super attack.
The cannon fodder Gears attacking Lahan do not stand a chance against Fei’s Super Desperation Move.
So...there’s a bit of collateral damage in the unleashing of power... But, hey. At least the townspeople will be able to persevere and rebuild thanks to Fe—
Oh err... Whoops... Well... There were a lot of people in Lahan. At least the people left that we cared about probably all made it to saf—
Well...shit...
“ALICE!!!”Citan grabs Dan to prevent him from running off as they watch the kid’s sister get vaporized...
“Noooooo!!!”
Well... That could have gone better... At least the worst is ov—
Welp!
Fei and the Gear (You should probably watch this.)
Lahan Fireworks (You should definitely watch this.)
Music: Knight of Fire
Music: Tears of the Stars, Hearts of the People
Dan Artwork – Unfortunate genetics at work...