Part 142: Episode CXXXIX: Dolphin Family Problems

Episode CXXXIX: Dolphin Family Problems

Music: Shevat, The Wind is Calling


And so we never have to talk to that useless jerk, Queen Zephyr, ever again. Hurray! Now, I said this chat was the only story related item in the Snowfield Hideout and it technically is... But, well... There is one more scene we should probably go check out as it resolves another important side character’s story arc.


First of all, we have to return to the central area and hop over the makeshift bar to skulk around in the back rooms...


Back there we find a bunch of refugees from Kislev. Including a fine young women upset about the chilly temperatures whilst remaining dressed like a stripper. I’m really not too upset the country of Kislev no longer exists in any functional form. Anyhow, if we wander a bit further down the hall in this area we will find...


“Lance!!”

The dolphin child goes running out the room and down the hall. Fei and the gang decide to investigate what’s going down...


"You...! You're alive!?"
”Well I am the protagonist. Hey, how’d that dolphin guy in the Yggdrasil get a character portrait but not you when you have four times as many lines?”
“Budget cuts.”
“Thought so... That said...”
"Yeah, you too... But if you're here, that means the Thames was..."
"The Thames... sank. The 'Angels' attacked... The Thames withstood the onslaught of Reapers, but was defenseless against those 'Angels'... Hardly anyone got out in time... They went down with the Thames..."
”Oh man... The Beer Hall...? Gone?”
*frown*
"Wha... wait a minute. What about the Captain? He's okay, right?"
*turns away* "The Captain... said... he'd watch the end of the Thames with his own eyes..."
"Y, you're kidding, right? That ol' guy died... No way..."
*turns back* "No! The Captain is alive. He is the kind that never keels over..."
“...”


“The kid who just left... seemed pretty angry about something."
"I'm embarrassed you just saw that. I got married just before the Thames went down."
*turns to wife* "Her name is Anna. She's my wife. She was saved by the Thames when the ships were attacked by Reapers. Unfortunately, that's when she lost her husband... Don't misunderstand me. It wasn't out of feeling sorry for her or anything like that... Or... Well, perhaps it was... I just wanted to protect her, that's all. If you call that feeling sorry, then I suppose I don't mind. The Captain teased me mercilessly. He said... 'What! A cold guy like you, seducing a widow? Just make sure the kid doesn't hate you...' Ha, ha... I guess the Captain was right. My stepson doesn't like me yet. But I'm hoping someday..."
_{”Psst. You think dolphin demi-humans have soap operas?”
“Oh I’m sure. They’re like telenovelas. But with dolphins.”
“Wiggy.”}
"I see... Boy, you've changed!"
"Ha, ha. You've changed too, Fei. I don't know how to explain it, but...”
”Yeah. I got rid of my psychotic supervillain alter ego and found God.”
“Oh... What, do you mean like the Ethos?”
“Naw. I mean like I found God. He lives in a big ancient space car battery or something.”
“Uh...huh...”
“As for me... well, I don't know what it is... I guess I've always had someone protecting me..."
"Hans..."
"Fei, I believe..."

A ghostly image of the Captain of the Thames enters the room as Hans speaks...


“Tap-tap-tapping with his cane... And he'll say... 'Haaaans! It looks like we'll get our hands on a priceless treasure! What kind of face is that? You don't believe me, huh? This time it's true... honest!' "
*turns away and sighs* "...Maybe someday..."
"Haaaans! It looks like we'll get our hands on a priceless treasure!"
!

The ghost Captain of the Thames becomes the genuine article...

Music: Thames, the Men of the Sea


”Hell yeah! I knew that old guy wasn’t toast.”
"Ca, ca, cap..."

Hans runs over and hugs the Captain...


"What's this shouting out 'Ca, ca, captain------!!'? Cut it out, you fool!"
"Do, you know how much I was worried about you!?"
"Hah! I've been telling you all along. Don't you get it? Now listen..."






"Gha, ha, ha, ha-a-a-a!!"


"Hans! This time it's true! It's an island with buried treasure. It's called 'Duneman Isle'. An ancient hero defeated a monster there, and now legend has it, his fabled sword rests there."
"What info do you have...? Do you know where the place is? What about a ship?"
"Don't know where it is! Don't have a ship! Don't worry with details!”
”See Fei. This guy knows the score.”
“Yeah, I’ve stop sweating details months ago. Pretty much the only way I’ve stayed sane.”
“...”
“Saneish.”
“Don't you know that attitude of yours is why that kid won't take to you?"
"That's none of your business!"
"Well, by the time that kid actually decides to like you... I'll have managed to get a new ship. Till then, give it all for your family, lad!! Give your family the love they need while you still have the chance. Ghar, har, har!!"


The Captain of the Thames wanders back into the hall. We’re free to talk to the rest of Hans’ family while we’re down here. His step-daughter, Kanna, learned the Thames Card Game before the ship went down...


For some reason, she turns into a shirtless middle aged white guy when you play. But otherwise, the game is unchanged from way back when. We can play her several times (up to five wins total) to get some special accessories. Beating her once gets us the Emeralda Jr. Doll (Counter attacks with attacks that deal the same damage), three times gets us the Bart Jr. Doll (Emeralda only accessory that increases critical attack rate), and five times gets us the Elly Jr. Doll (Randomly doubles or halves Ether damage by 50%.) Neat.


“Please don't think I'm a loose woman... But it's because of this man that I... (blush)..."
”Never needed to hear a dolphin defend herself of being a ‘loose woman’.”
“Nope. Not at all.”

Fei and the gang head out and speak with the Captain one final time...


“I should really talk to my nanomachine daughter one of these days. I think I’ve said like three lines to her since she joined the party.”
"I wish you were my dad. Can I call you Dad?"
"Ghar, har, har! That's a laugh... A walrus with a penguin for a son! Ghar, har, har!"
"I'm not a penguin! I'm a dolphin!!"
"Oh? Hans is a penguin."
"My dad is a dolphin, too! Oops... Forget what I just said. I didn't mean to call him dad! Who would want a father like him!?"
"Ghar, har, har, ha-a-a!!"
”Captain, how are you still sloshed in a post-apocalyptic hideout?”
“Minor details, my boy! Minor details! Ghar, har, har, ha-a-a!!”










Captain of the Thames Concept Art – Director’s Commentary: “A Walrus.”