Part 73: Episode LXX: The Continuing Shittiest Day Ever for Billy Lee Black

Episode LXX: The Continuing Shittiest Day Ever for Billy Lee Black

Music: Grahf, Emperor of Darkness


So who is up for an unwinnable boss battle? Well, not really. Thanks to Grahf granting the not-Catholic who was secretly not-Jewish Bishop Skullstein THE POWER, he is currently invincible.




So all we can do is just sit around with our thumbs up our asses for two turns while he blasts the party with Ethos Seal attacks knocking off 1200+ HP each round. This is already going swimmingly.

After getting two free turns...


"...There is some kind of barrier. Some kind of negative feeling... hatred, somehow changed into an Ether, forming a barrier... If we can somehow change our strong force of will into Ether also and throw that back at it..."
”Yeah...well why don’t you get your ass out here and help do that too, Citan?!”
“I couldn’t. There is not enough room on the Yggdrasil’s hull to support a fourth Gear.”
*grumble*


”Aaaaah!”
“Oh God!”
“What the fu... What did you guys DO to him down in that dig site?!”
“Tell me, are you suffering?!”
“No... No, I am just peachy compared to whatever is going on with... What is going on with you...?”
“When I took you in 4 years ago, that was proof of my old friendship with your father... In that hate stained friendship with Jesiah, we competed for command of Gebler! Jesiah, like a beast, you stole the Racquel I loved, and threw away the command of Gebler that I wanted so much, then disappeared from Solaris!"
”That is not even beginning to explain what happened to all your skin...”

FLASHBACK!


"Racquel, dirtied by him...and the reminder of that taint...you and your sister...”




”Dick move!”


”Dick move!”
“I just said that...”
“Oh, be quiet. This is the end of MY story arc!”


“Those Reapers that you have been purging are really all people... They were chosen by the 'Ethos' and converted by Krelian! You've been slaughtering people! Ha ha ha... A wretched son for a wretched father! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
”Umm...well, yeah... They were zombies... What else were they going to be made from...?”
"Ha, confess to me! Pay for your sins!"
_{”Psst... Elly... Did you bring sandwiches...?”
“Bart, this is not an appropriate ti—“
“But you did bring some, didn’t you...?”
“...Yes.”
“C’mon. Toss one over here.”
*sigh* “Slide over here quietly. Don't let Billy see you.”}


"...!"
“You say you and Racquel were in love? You always were a narcissistic self-preserving fool!!”
”Time for you to shut up and get your shit pushed in by something other than an underaged choir boy.”
"!!! ... This voice...!!"

Jesiah out of fucking nowhere!


“Use this, Billy!! If you use this you can rip off the barrier!!"


“It is an Ether gun Gear where the pilot rides directly in the bullet. If we use that we can break Stone's negative hatred power! ...H, however..."

Music: Knight of Fire


“...then we can break through that barrier with our combined attack. I'm gonna borrow your shoulder for a moment, so start aiming now."


“But, I want you to know that you aren't gonna see Racquel when you die...! That's because your destination is going to be hell!"
”Looks like you already dressed up for the occasion. Alright then, let’s take care of that mad case of dick envy ya got brewing!”


“Billy, can you hear me!? Billy!? ... No good... There is no response!!"

The Yggdrasil’s radio inexplicably fails. Much like the sunroof, this has never happened before and will never happen again. Drama!


“Stein's teachings were all a deception. That fabricated faith was just a worldly system for compensating those people with fragile souls. But, faith and god aren't things which are given to you from others, right? They are things you have to discover within yourself, and by yourself. Things that cannot be put into words, things that cannot be expressed... Isn't that what god is all about? 'Question not thy god, for thy god doth not respond.' "
”Dad, are you drunk...?”
“I don’t step in these lousy Gears without at least having a pint of something in me.”


"The reason I taught you how to use a gun as a child was to save people. You say that guns are just tools for killing people. But you are wrong. 'Guns' don't kill people. 'People' kill people. Have you ever looked at the expressions on the faces of those reapers you have destroyed? It is an excruciating process to be turned into a reaper. To ease their torturous pain, they seek human blood, and attack people in order to get it. But, that does not vanquish the true pain within their hearts. There is only one way to be saved from the pain. That is by termination. Didn't all those reapers put out of their misery by you have peaceful looks on their faces?”
”At least the ones that still had heads when you were finished with ‘em...”
“Your gun saved those people who were turned into reapers. It's not something anyone can do. The faith that enabled you to accomplish that was no deception... God exists within you!"
"Father..."
”Alright, pep talk over. Let’s get to some shit stomping on Skeletor here before he starts moping about how I cut in line in front of him in grade school and got the last ice cream sandwich or some shit.”




Aww. Look at Jessie’s lil’ giant robot. It may be small, but it’s more than meets the eye.






Turns out that Buntline is a transformer and morphs into a giant fuck-off cannon for Billy’s Gear. Jessie is the best dad.










And kaboom! So much for Grahf’s THE POWER busin—


“That is a weapon that uses its pilot as the warhead!"
”It does WHAT?! WHO WOULD BUILD SOMETHING LIKE THAT?!?!”
“Well...err...I may have...assisted in its...devel—“
"What!? Th, then, father is...”
“Citan. After this fight I’m coming back there and kicking your ass!”


Poor Billy. He's known Fei's party for all of two days and the universe has taken the biggest, wettest diarrhea shit all over every faucet of his life because of it.










Buntline Cannon Away




Buntline Concept Art