Part 98: Episode XCV: Fei and Elly's Shower Scenes
Episode XCV: Fei and Elly's Shower Scenes
Music: Fuse
*nods* "Yeah. It was just so sudden." ”But hey. I’m always up for a good action jump.” “We gotta get moving! Those weird robots are coming after us!"
*ponders* "...? What's wrong, Elly?" "...So, this is the place... I might be able to do something. Anyway, let's try to run through here!!" “Yeah!!”
Thankfully, this is not actually another dire sewer level. Instead, it’s just a goofy chase sequence. Fei and Elly must run, jump, and climb their way down westward down this rather inefficiently designed sewer in order to escape the pursuing Security Cubes (that are not actually cubes.)
Said drones spawn behind our heroes roughly every 10 seconds. They move at exactly the same speed as Fei and Elly run. However, all the platforming, ladder climbing, and bridge switching will cause them to inevitably catch up.
When they do, we are forced into an inescapable battle with the Security Guitar Picks. But, that’s alright. They are some of the least threatening enemies in the whole game.
Security Cubes’ gimmick is that at the start of the round they will either switch to a mode where they have unbelievable high physical attack resistance...but their Ether resistance becomes a dump stat. Or vice-versa. After that point, a single combo/ether attack will destroy them. I made it through the whole sequence without even seeing on of ‘em attack. All they do is ram into one of our party members or zap ‘em with a laser. Both for in the ballpark of fewer than 50 HP of damage.
After about five minutes of this silliness, we finally come to a ladder leading away from this area and to safety. Security Cubes cannot use ladders. That would be absurd!
The pair walks a bit further into this new area...
Music: The Treasure Which Cannot Be Stolen
*opens gate* "The 1st Class citizen level. This is where the Solaris people called Gazel live. Follow me." "W... wait. The guard robot may get you again if you go in there..." ”I mean, I know we just trashed like two dozen of those things without breaking a sweat. But...I mean this is cutscene zone. Anything goes!”
"Y... your house? This big house is yours?" "Yep. Come on in."
So yeah... Elhaym gave up living in a mansion in the sky utopia in favor of living on a submarine-airship with constant threat of getting killed all because...Fei wore her down with all his pestering to join the party and give up the military. I think Elly has made some questionable life decisions during the course of this narrative...
The pair enter the huge ass Van Houten estate...
We are immediately greeted by Elly’s mother, Medena. Nobody actually ever mentions Medena’s name. You’ll just have to that the text box’s word on it.
"The military told me you were missing in action..." *shakes head* "No, mother, that's not true. See, I'm alive!" ”Totally not AWOL...” “I said MIA.” “...And that’s what I meant. It’s been a long day!” "Mother, where is father?" "He's still at the palace. I think he'll be back soon..." "I see..." "Elly, who's this?" "What? Ah... Um, he's from the Special Forces, the same as me. He was only recently promoted from 3rd Class citizen. It's because of him I was able to return. Right, Fei?” "What? Um... no... I mean..." ”No. Wait! I mean yes! I mean...wait, are we all speaking the same language again? I’m so confused...”
<Good grief.> "I see. That must be why he's dressed like a land dweller. But, why isn't he wearing a Special Forces uniform like you, Elly?" ”Well first of all, they’d need to find some pants. And then I’d ne—“ "S, sorry mother. There's a report I must turn in right away, so... Fei, come with me."Elly drags Fei to her room upstairs...
"Ahh, I can finally relax." ”Yeah. If you just forget about the security forces after us, our friends going to be executed in a couple days, and multiple people with direct vendettas against both of us then sure... Totally time to unwind...” “Oh, will you stop being such a spoil sport. We’re safe here. Just make yourself at home.” "This place is huge! It must be bigger than the village chief's!" "Heh. I'm sweaty after running, so I'm taking a shower."
”Ah crap. Shoulda worn baggier pants...”Elly walks into the cylinder in the center of her room, which is apparently the private bathroom. Not the best architecture on a home I have ever seen...
"It's pretty normal." (It's not normal...) "When are you going to stop staring?" ”Ergh. Don’t you have like a curtain or anything...?” “Well, it is my room. Why would I need that?” “...I take it Solaris isn’t big on basic privacy.” “There is a whole bureau for monitoring people’s memory card files. What do you think?”Fei turns around and lets Elly shower. Since waiting quietly on the other side of the room would be too normal...
"Yes." ”I only called her ‘mother’ three or four times.” "Oh. She sure is a pretty lady." "...Yes, she is." "But you don't look much like her. Do you resemble your father?" “Haven’t you noticed yet?”’ "What do you mean?"Music: Lost... Broken Shards
“...different from normal Solarians..." "I've never paid attention to it so... Really?" ”...Well, now that you mention it white skin and blue eyes seems pretty common. Red hair...not so much...” "A long time ago, when I was small, I had a nanny. She was so nice to me. But she was a land dweller. And First Class citizens rarely associate with them. But the nanny lived in our house and took care of me. She lost her child when she was in the 3rd Class area... My dad felt sorry for her and kept her under his protection. But he never told anyone about her..." "Why?" "My father was worried about my appearance... He had a reason for it. She was probably my real..." "Elly..." <This is getting incredibly awkward...> *turns off shower* "I'd better not... I'm sure you don't want to hear about this... Sorry." "That's alright..." ”Ah crap! She’s getting out of the shower! Ugh. Think of something, Fei... Umm... Umm... Oh god, all the women I’ve met have been attractive or underaged. Alright. Think of guys! Ramsus in a speedo. Uhh...Bart and Sigurd going at it. Argh... Rico in a thong bikini!” “And there we go...no more pants tent pitched. That was close...”A bit later... - Music: The Treasure Which Cannot Be Stolen
"No thanks. I don't have time for that." ”Ya know. Friends getting executed. Toppling the government and all that...” *walks up to Fei* "You need to relax. You don't get a chance like this very often. Please?" ”I really don—“ <Wait...what the HELL am I doing...? A hot chick is asking you to shower in front of her...>Fei hops in the shower...
*nods* "You should've listened to me in the first place."The shower activates as Elly walks off...
"You're fine. Just relax." ”All of my clothes vanished!” “Yeah. It does that. They’ll come back when you’re done.”Elly wanders back over and stares in on Fei...
“There's a world of difference between this and doc's old bathtub!" ”I’m not even going to touch that one...” *jumps and turns away* "S, stop it! Stop staring at me!" "Don't worry, I'm not looking. I'm just adjusting it. How's the temperature?" ”Why is the temperature setting on the outside?! Whatever...” "Hey, I'm fine. Go away, NOW!!" "Aha, ha... Fei's got a cute side to him." “...??” ”...This one is gonna be slightly harder to hide.”Some time later...
"Yes, I really don't want to...but, there's no other choice..." "You have any good ideas?" "The network terminal in my father's room. He got angry with me for touching it once. There is numerous information only a handful of people have access to." "So we can find out where Bart and the others are located from that?" "I... hope so." ”Eh. I’ve ran with way sketchier plans... Let’s go.”
Fei and Elly attempt to enter Mr. Van Houten’s office to access the Internet. However...
“Don't you remember how mad he got last time? What am I going to do with you..." ”Mother, I was like eight then.” *walks off* “Tsk, tsk...”The two follow Medena into the kitchen...
“Your father said you'd be back. I almost gave up hope." "...Mother." "Are you staying for a while? This time you should relax. Your father will be so happy." "Yes... I guess." "Let's have a nice meal. Fei, would you like to join us? Elly never invites her friends over. I'm glad you're here." ”Yeah well, having met some of her other friends...I can kinda see why...” "Well, I'm going shopping, so make yourself comfortable."Medena now wanders off, leaving us free to properly bust into Elly’s dad’s computer. But first, let’s investigate the only other room in the house we have yet to explore.
The pair enters the den and finds a maid that Papa Van Houten has probably not slept with...
“I thought you passed away... Master will be so happy! Oh yes, there is a present from you from the Master! Please take care of it!”
The maid hands over the best Rod available to Elly at this point in the game: the Psycho Rod.
...
Elhaym’s father gave her daughter a gift called the “Psycho Rod”. Elly...the girl that had a psychotic episode where she murdered a half dozen people earlier in her life... I guess Mr. Van Houten has a
Fei and Elly bust into dear daddy’s office...
“If we can break through the palace network security by accessing this..." ”Did you put some skillpoints into hacking? Cuz I sure didn’t. That was usually doc’s deal...” *types* "ID... The password would probably be something related to me." ”Kinda presumptuous, ain’t it? What if it’s something about your mother?” “Pfft.” *types* " ' E L H A Y M '..."
>>>Access denied. Enter the correct password. "That's no good.” ”He’s probably thrown some numbers in there too. It could be tou—“ *types* “Let's try it backwards... 'M Y A H L E' " >>>Welcome to Solaris Net... You have 19 unread mails. "Yes! Got it!” ”...Really? How highly ranking is your dad, again?” “Yeah...Solaris has pretty embarrassingly bad IT security. It’s best not to talk about it.” *types* “Let's see, we were here before so... Wow, it connects to here! Fei, we should be able to get to where everyone is, from a trash chute in the 3rd Class citizen level!" "That means, we're going back to that first location." *nods*"Now we know where we are! Let's hurry!"
“Elly, where are you going?”Music: Fuse
"What're you doing, Elly...? I told you before not to come in here and touch that machine." ”You didn’t touch that folder marked Tax Records, did you?” “...No. Why? What’s in there?” “N-Nothing! Tax records!” "..."Elly’s father walks over to a panel and dials up something...
“A burglar broke in here, yeah, come quickly." ”Wha? There’s a burglar in here too? Isn’t enough happening?!”Erich walks over toward the desk...
"Then, what is he? A strange man in my room... Isn't he a burglar?" ”God, father! You do this with EVERY boy I bring home!”Erich pulls out a gun...
*shakes head* "Please! Don't shoot him! Fei just wants to save his captured friends! They're my friends too!" "No! Even if he is your friend, I can't overlook a land dweller who tries to sneak into the palace!" "Fine. Then I'm also a traitor. Go ahead and shoot me!" *sigh* “Every time you don’t get your way you tell me to shoot you. Elly, this is not the way adults do things.” “I don’t care. I’m going!” "No! You're staying here! Now, move out of the way Elly!!" "No!" “......” ”Awkward...”Music: Lost... Broken Shards
“You'll be safe if we kill the intruders who know about us. I'm worried about your safety..." "You're lying! You just hate being in any position that endangers you. Isn't that why you didn't want me to join Jugend? You just didn't want everyone to see your own daughter! Because I'm half a land dweller...!" ”So awkward...”
Medena gets startled at the revelation the child she did not give birth to is indeed not really her daughter. Or maybe the fact that Elly figured out the redhead ex-maid looked suspiciously like her... Whatever the case, she gets upset and runs off.
And Erich slaps the taste out of her mouth for being doing that. Elly sure gets smacked around a lot. Forest elves. Dinosaurs. Co-workers. Her dad. Hell, Fei almost did it back in Kislev.
“How dare you say that in front of your mother...!" "Because...!" ”Okay. I don’t want this turning into an episode of Springer...” "Stop it!! I don't want to see a father and a daughter fight because of me. I won't cause you any more trouble. I came of my own will. I'm an intruder. If I just get out of here it'll be fine." "Fei!?" "Elly, you shouldn't say that in front of your mother. I don't know the truth, but she is your mother, not a stranger. Isn't that right?" “...” "Now, get out of the way. I hafta hurry to save my friends. But if you intend to shoot me, I'll put up a big fight." ”Seriously. I’ve gotten shot like 50 times already. I’ve got over 500 HP. You’re gonna need more than that pea shooter to stop me.”
Erich walks over to a nearby window and lobs his gun out it. Fei’s right. Who uses guns in an RPG? Vincent Valentine. That’s who! And nobody wants to be like Vincent Valentine.
"? Father...?" "The intruder has escaped. Now get outta here. It'll be a while until the guards get here." “...” "You may be an intruder, but the fact is, you protected my daughter. If I shoot you, I'll lose her." "Father... Let me go with Fei...!" "No. I can't let you go." *shakes head* "But...!" ”Puuleez, daddy! Pretty please!!” “That might work when I’m buying you something for Christmas or sleeping over at a friend’s house. But it fails when it comes to high treason. You are staying put.”Fei begins walking out...
“We won't trouble you any further. I'll go by myself." "Fei!!" "Elly, this time leave the military. Thanks for everything."Fei runs out the door...
And so Fei runs off alone, unable to speak the language, and with no way to get past any intruder vaporizing checkpoints. Yeah, I’m sure this will go well...
Elly Shower Sketch – Since pretty much every male artist ever has a stash of pervy sketches of female characters.