Part 24: Chewbot Needs a Nap

Note from the editor:
Chewbot is no longer writing this LP. He began to write an entire update in haiku based on nothing but the screenshots we gave him, but left about 45 minutes ago claiming he had to use the bathroom "because the game was trying to fuck him", and he may have murdered himself with a toothbrush and some mint dental floss. I'm going to check into it. In the meantime, we've asked a twelve year old girl to write the update in his place. Thank you for your patience.



Pretty butterflies,
Twinkling as they float by.
Poetry is neat.



One time me and dad
Saw animals at the zoo!
It was really fun.



Sue took my crayon,
It was my favorite one.
She will pay for this.



Just leave me to die,
I don't wanna write no more!
OW GOD DAMMIT, STOP!

Note from the editor: we found Chewbot and he's going back to work on the update.



Fine, I guess I'm back,
I was just brushing my teeth.
Not stabbing myself.



If you were hoping
These would be OT-related...
You can suck a fuck.



I mean, look at this!
There is nothing going on!
The game knows we're here.



I have an idea;
Let's pretend to ignore it.
It may get jealous.



One day grandpa said
"Some day you'll look just like me!"
Then things got ugly.



One time I passed out
And woke up a millionairre!
No wait, I was drunk.



Sometimes I stare up
Into the starry night sky...
And have a seizure.



While I was hiking
I saw a sleeping vagrant.
He was all pooped out.



I like my women
Like I like my chicken wings.
Slathered in gravy.



And we went all night,
me and that fat prostitute!
That's how you were born!



I dropped my baby
Off a four-story building.
Into a croc pit.



Wait, did you see that?!
Oh my God, something happened!
HEAVY FUCKING FOG.



For a second there,
I thought this update might suck.
Crisis averted.

FUCK YOU, OREGON TRAIL.