Part 56: Intro - Gott Mit Uns

Alright, fuckers, let's do this shit. Look, I even got a wacky "gothic" font for the titles like I got "spooky Gothic" and "German Gothic" mixed up like all the other amateurs out there, because it's time to delve into the wonderful world of Bloodlines modding.



Those of you that frequent the Bloodlines thread in Games might have already noticed that I was playing around a bit with the Antitribu Mod and have been marvelling at some of its more questionable design choices. Like many ambitious mod projects involving cult classics, it promises everything, has only a fraction, compounds it with some very strange design choices, and turns the entire thing into a weirdly compelling mess. So, are you sitting comfortably? Let's read from the mod's webpage to see just what we're in for.


"The most anticipated expansion"! Ever, I presume. Well hot damn, that sounds great! Seven new clans! Ten new disciplines! New main quests, maps, and over 100 new characters! Tell me more!


We will be looking at the clans in the first update proper, actually. Don't get too excited about voting - I've already decided on the character I'll be using, and I'll tell you why when we get there.


They're not fucking joking, either. If you come expecting something about as difficult as vanilla Bloodlines, be prepared to get eaten up and spat out. This mod is not afraid to get rough with you, and it didn't set up a safeword either (well, unless you consider "Escape key" one).


Yep, a lot of enemies now are capable of spellcasting, and let me tell you, it messes you up. It's another layer of problems you'll be facing in combat, and I say "problem" as in "an in-game problem that adds difficulty", not "a design problem that's just shit". Those come in other flavors.


There is indeed a large variety of new stuff out there for you to be surprised by. If the surprise is positive is left as an exercise for the viewer. Now, here's some choice pieces from the changelog for version 1.0:


Yes, this mod implements the Companion Mod that was posted earlier in the thread! Now doesn't that make you want to see more of this mod?


Player equipment basically boils down to "items you have that give you bonuses and drawbacks and you can drop to lose those bonuses and drawbacks". It's kind of annoying, actually. And yes, there is blood loss in this mod, and it's also a pain in the ass, especially given that you need your disciplines more than ever.


This is really fucking important. I didn't play a lot of this mod before deciding to start this, mostly because discovering things along with the thread seems like a really fun time as opposed to trudging through it on my own to find everything, but there were two bosses I played that had important background elements that were crucial to notice, and they were highlighted with Inspection - during a battle, it's very hard to search the room, so everything that can help you notice these things is very helpful.


Increased difficulty... yeah, they're not kidding.


Note that the characters mentioned for new/alternative models and textures are all female. Just sayin'. This might give us an idea what's in store... oh, who the fuck am I kidding, we all know what we're in for.


There is a lot of licensed music that has been added, particularly to the clubs. It kind of fits, but it just can't beat the original soundtrack. Also, the music at the Last Round is now "King of Kings" by Motörhead, which now has me imagining Triple H and Smiling Jack having a fight, and that's awesome. Well, either Triple H or professional darts player Meryvn King, which is less awesome and more amusing.


So the main thing of the mod isn't done. Then don't fucking call it version 1.0 god fucking damnit this isn't how versions work! I mean I know we're now in the age of Early Access, forever unfinished games being sold in stores and main parts of the game being gutted for DLC, but the fact remains that if the crucial part of your mod isn't actually finished yet, you can't call yourself a finished product! This is still a beta, damnit! Why did we agree upon this system when people just ignore it anyway?

...well, this is off to a great start. Put some T&A in your mod to titillate highschoolers/teenagers/whatnot and I won't really care because who am I to police what you can do with your spare time and really, I'm the one choosing to play it (though I'm still going to take the piss out of it, but not in a chastising way, more in a "guys, I hate to say it, but if you want me to jerk off to this, you've failed at your job, because this is crap" way), but don't you fucking dare use improper version control. This isn't version 1.0.9, it's Alpha 4, since you clearly state it's not feature complete yet. Quote:


Not to mention that you still have the most difficult parts before you, and this mod has been in work since at least 2011 (according to some forum posts on GameFAQs), probably longer. You got your work cut out for you there, lads. Anyway, what else are we going to be in for?


I.E. Don't expect to be going through the old quests without getting fucked in some way. Hooray! What else are we in for?


Oh boy. I haven't played that far yet, but I can confirm: There are boobies involved. Bare-ass titties. Now doesn't that make you want to play this?


Oh boy. Because what Bloodlines needed was modern pop culture references.


Oh boy. I find that "dark humor" is one of the things people love to use and claim to be good at, but rarely actually understand, and as a result, it usually goes to shit. As a personal sidenote, my personal favorite when it comes to dark humor is the "The Suicide Guy" routine from George Carlin's "Life is Worth Losing" show, particularly the section on the plan of somebody planning to commit suicide, starting about 3 minutes in. I expect we won't be finding anything of that quality in this mod.


Oh fucking boy. I'm sure our WoD experts are going to have some fun with this. Probably a fucking field day.

So now that we've established that we're probably going to be heading right into a trainwreck in slow motion, how are we going to be doing this?

- The LP will continue in the expected manner, screenshots, round portraits, title cards and all. However, there will be a few alterations:
- No boss fight videos. This mod has a lot of boss fight, and while a lot of them are interesting, I'd kill my internet connection attempting to upload videos of all of them. As I'm currently on vacation from university, I can't mooch off their quick connection. However, if there's something I really need to show off in video form or something where a short clip will suffice, I'll still put a video up. I'll try to make the descriptions in the updates more detailed to make up for it.
- A lot of things will be skipped. This mostly concerns dialogue from the original game, since we've already seen all of that stuff.
- There will be console commands. Probably. As to be expected by a mod this complex, things get kinda messy at times, and noclipping and godmoding might be necessary. I haven't needed it in my short test run, but I expect it to be necessary later.
- I will try to highlight the nice parts of the mod, because I have the sneaking suspicion that the bad is going to outweigh the good, but at the same time, it does have this enchanting quality that makes me want to share this with everybody, so it has to be doing something right, right?

That should be about it. May God be with us. Or Caine, whatever you prefer.