The Let's Play Archive

Avernum: Escape from the Pit

by TooMuchAbstraction

Part 1: Prologue: The Beginnings of Greatness

"Ha, fools! They think they've gotten the better of me by chucking me through some portal? Now that I'm in Avernum they've nothing to worry about? This is only the beginning! Soon the world will know the awesome power of Lagran!"

"You say something?"

"Er, oh, nothing you need worry yourself god man where are your clothes?"

"Don't need 'em! They were just holding my beautiful muscles back! I don't suppose you have any oil on you?"

"The only light here is from phosphorescent fungi. How on Earth are you so shiny?"

"Phospho-what? Anyone who knows words like that deserves keeping an eye on. Care to join me? I can assure you you will be well rewarded!"

"Ehh, sure, nothing better going on anyway."

"And you, mostly-naked man? I can promise plenty of exercise, and you look like you'd make a magnificient meatsh, er, soldier."

"Not too much cardio, right? And we'd better have plenty of protein. By the way, my name's --"

"Don't know, don't care. Oh hey! A priest! Sir, we could use a man of the cloth on our journeys!"

"...priest, yes...yes, of course, I'm a priest, who's gonna say otherwise? With the blessings and the calling down of god's favors, and not the animating of corpses or the summoning of demons. A priest, that's me! Whaddaya want?"

"Join me on my journey towards greatness! And everything you wish will be yours, in time. You stand in the magnificient presence of Lagran!"

"Sure, why not? Y'all's bodies are in good shape anyway. Nice sinews on that boy there. Good, how'd'you say, raw materials."

"Excellent, then we're all agreed. Come, let's get out of here. Such a humble location clearly has nothing worthwhile!"

"Sirs! A moment of your time!"

"Then again...what are you talking about, man?"

"Nope, I was wrong. Leaving now! Lagran fights for nobody but himself!"

"The gates! Let's go!"

"Don't care, leaving now!"

"Uh, you sure about that? It's free money!"

"After they make you swear an oath of fealty, no doubt. Lagran owes allegiance only to himself!"

"If you say so, boss."

"Ahh, glorious freedom! Friends, remember this day! It is the first day of Year Zero, for henceforth all calendars will measure from the Ascencion of Lagran!"

"On the other hand, the brain on that one might be somewhat damaged..."

"Come, I spy a fortress we can use as our base of operations!"

"Looks like it's seen better days, boss. You sure about this?"

"I've never been more sure of anything in my life!"

"It's just, I don't think we're alone here."

"Of course not, you buffoon! And the bandits here will form the basis for the new Army of Lagran! We need merely find their leader and he shall soon see the wisdom of working under our banner!"

"Ahh! Men, you are being given a glorious opportunity! Join me, and I shall lead you to a new world! A world where the powerful take what is rightfully theirs! We shall found a kingdom! The Kingdom of Lagran!"

"Hey, a wise guy! Funny, I didn't think there were any clowns in the caves. Boys, get 'im!"

"Great going, Lagran. You asshole."

"Er, right. No matter, surely you are capable of vanquishing such a small squid of brigands? I'll just...stand over here."

"Hey, watch the skin! What're you trying to do, scar me? Lagran you coward, get back here and help!"

"I'll just be going, then..."

"This is not going well! Healing, I need healing!"

"Oh, well, if you wanted one of those kinds of priests, you should have said. Ingrate."

"Hey boys, what say we settle this over a game of dice? No? Well, fair enough."

"Lagran shall rise again! This is only the beginning!"