The Let's Play Archive

Chrono Cross

by The Dark Id

Part 3: Episode II: Girls are Scary

Music: Home Village of Arni

Welp, that was enough to give Freudian a field day. Time to get crackin' with err...does Serge even have a job...? apparently Silent Protagonist is now a profession. I wonder what kind of tax breaks mute heroes get... Does it pay well?

Before heading off to adventure, it is best to raid old Serge's life savings of a whole...200 bucks. I suppose that answers that question.

Out in the kitchen (like she should be!) is Serge's mom, Marge. "Simpsons did it" is at least one thing Chrono Cross' plot cannot claim...

But, you just said good morning. If it's past noon you're supposed to have a stern look and say "good afternoon, Serge" and then speak privately with the neighbors about how your son is such a deadbeat and you'd wish he would move out already. What kind of parent are you?

"Leena came by to see if you were up, but you, young man, were still in never-never land. You shouldn't break promises like that. Girls can be pretty scary if you make them angry!"
"Mom, Leena is a nagging harpy that came out of the womb with PMS. I couldn't piss her off any more if I tried."

Serge's mom has two cats. This indicates her husband is dead.

Our hero resides in the quaint idyllic fishing village of Arni. Despite being a remote, harmless berg full of peaceful folk living simple lives alongside Serge, shockingly enough nothing bad ever happens to Arni. Really. It's never razed to the ground by an evil empire, its citizens are never butchered by raiding hordes of monsters, and Serge is never even exiled from the place. It just remains a chill little town.

I know, it's bananas!

Lenna's sister (who looks absolutely nothing like her) is hanging out in the town square. Despite having 45 recruitable characters in the game both Marge and Una are not among them despite having character portraits.

And if you're wondering if this kid isn't a party candidate due to her She's well above Serge's cut-off-date for recruitment.  The youngest potential party member is six years old. 

"That was real gutsy of you! I guess that kinda shows her whose boss, eh? Don't tell her I said so, but my sister's a bit uptight, you know?"
"She could definitely afford to take a shower after she goes to the beach."
"Ya know... It's sandy at the beach."

That is an entirely uncomfortable request coming from a ten year old.

Nobody bothers telling us but Leena is hanging out on the dock.

In case you've guessed, the redhead with the hands on her hips and pissed at the world stance whilst everyone else seems to be enjoying themselves is our query Leena.

Marge was apparently too busy dotting on her precious cats to poke her head in Serge's room to say he had a visitor. It only would have interrupted Serge's sweet dreams of snuffing out the lives of women and robots.

"Urgh... No... Was I drinking last night...? My head kind of hurts come to think of it."

"Oh God! How much did I drink?!?"

"C'mon, you guys should join us! It feels really good!"

Yes, adult supervision of children is a task of utmost seriousness and concentration.

"Remember when we were like that? Not a single care or worry on our minds... How each day lasted an eternity, filled with newness, fun and excitement..."
"What the hell are you talking about? I'm seventeen. I slept in until 1:30 in the afternoon just because I felt like it. You're sixteen. Your plans for the day were fucking around at the beach with me until you got roped into watching your little brothers. Just because you started getting your periods and I started shaving doesn't mean we're hitting friggin' retirement age!"

"YES! We have to face up to reality and live each day anew!!"
"Now then, let us discuss how you are going to end some lives on my behalf to express this vibrant zeal for living life to the fullest!!"

"I would join you, but I still have to watch the kids... It's your fault; you were late!"
"By 'join me' you mean 'sit on the beach and wait for me to do the same thing', right?"
"I would have been there in spirit!"

So Leena is angry she'll be ditching her babysitting duties later rather than sooner, am I getting that?

That's right, Serge. Grow a pair.

"Think about it! It's your fault for sleeping in, you know! Seeing as how you let me down, I'd say you owe me a couple hundred of those scales! Now go! Go to Lizard Rock and get some scales for me! I'll let you off easy with only 3 scales. I'm counting on you, Serge. Good luck, OK?"

Leena will only be satisfied with still glistening from with blood from freshly slain endangered Komodo Dragon young. And each scale must be carved from an individual hide. None of this harvesting multiple scales from the same corpse bullshit. And when Serge and Leena get married she expects no less than a Blood Dreamstone smuggled from the southern mines of Medina.


Serge is a slacker teenager who sleeps past noon. He lives with his mom -- a cat lady. The girl next door Leena is a tremendous bitch that wants Serge to slay a bunch of fire breathing Komodo Dragons so she can make a pretty necklace and feel like a princess. Serge can opt to tell her to blow it up her ass, but sadly thou must...

Serge Official Art - Pirate Hipster

Leena Official Art - It is never okay to wear socks and sandals...

Home Village of Arni