Part 29: Stair Master!
Update 26: Stair Master!Alright, Dread Bridge time.
![](1-Stairmaster_0001.jpg)
And that amazing X Fortress music is back
![:allears:](../Smilies/emot-allears.gif)
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die die die die die
I'm not in the mood for this bullcrap.
![](3-Stairmaster_0003.jpg)
Presents are accepted though.
This room exits from the left and the right. Our first stop is to the left.
![](4-Stairmaster_0004.jpg)
And of course there's fire. Why wouldn't there be fire.
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The button opens the door on the top left there.
~~~Backtracking~~~
to the fire place and going north.
![](6-Stairmaster_0007.jpg)
Huh. I found the stairs already. That was quick. I might as well go check out the rest of the area.
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More fodder. These things aren't even threatening thanks to my electrical resistance.
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Hey, the right exit from the first room is a mirror.
![](9-Stairmaster_0010.jpg)
Oh well, nothing useful.
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The MarineDevimon room is like an I.
![](11-Stairmaster_0012.jpg)
A large and angry I that leads off into a room filled with Missile Dogs.
![](12-Stairmaster_0013.jpg)
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Missile Dogs that apparently are good to kill.
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The room opens in all directions. Going down...
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Stupid chests not having anything good...
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Stupid fire not having anything good...
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Stupid stairs coming out of the left exit not hav-
Wait. Wait wait wait wait wait.
There are multiple stairs that I have found. This means one of two things - either the Mecha Rogue really needed to work on their thighs or this is a stair maze.
I'm pretty sure it's a stair maze.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
![](18-Stairmaster_0019.jpg)
UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKING HELL WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT
also this room is north of the Missle Dogs.
![](19-Stairmaster_0020.jpg)
Is having to fight your way through a metric crapton of enemies not enough? Did you have to make it a goddamn maze?
![](20-Stairmaster_0021.jpg)
top right exit to the I
Is the dungeon designer that malicious that I have to suffer through this crap?
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There can be no hope. There is only suffering.
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NO DON'T MAKE ME GO UP THERE
PLEASE
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MarineDevimon died for your sins.
The sins of making this goddamn level
![:argh:](../Smilies/emot-argh.gif)
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Also I figured out what that blue magic does. It's Freeze, and it works like Pwr Down.
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This room is strange. It's just a ramp up. And there are holes in the wall.
![](27-Stairmaster_0028.jpg)
OH HOLY SHIT
When the thing 'shunk'ed across the gap, it actually terrified me for a split second.
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The button closes the right electric gate.
Also those Otamamon are murdered through an electric fence.
![](29-Stairmaster_0031.jpg)
This is a one way trip here. No going back up.
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The button opens the left electrical barrier.
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.........crap.
I see an easily accesible up stair. This is not good.
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Hey look at where we are. It's almost as if we're opening up a locked door to create a shortcut.
Shocking isn't it.
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Back up on the second floor, more tentacles to deal with.
Now that I think about it, what do they use those tentacles for?
![](34-Stairmaster_0037.jpg)
Obviously, the answer is "storing goodies like pinatas".
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I'll take "Down" for $100, please.
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All the Gekomon.
![](37-Stairmaster_0040.jpg)
There's just money in these chests.
~~~Backtracking!~~~
to the second floor
![](38-Stairmaster_0041.jpg)
Now that this is shut off, we can enter.
(total stair count: 5)
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And go right back down.
(total stair count: 6)
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kill maim murder destroy
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rip tear gnaw feast
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Aw thanks, you shouldn't have.
No, wait, yes you should have.
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There is a large amount of hate right now.
It is mostly to do with the fact that if I want what's in there, I need to backtrack.
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On the right side: nothing.
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Further along: also nothing.
~~~Backtracking~~~
to the second floor
(total stair count: 7)
![](46-Stairmaster_0049.jpg)
These two actually split up and went around me to avoid my axes.
They died first as a small gift.
![](47-Stairmaster_0050.jpg)
Christ, more electric gates.
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These die so quickly it's not even funny.
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I still like the Jesus pose one I found earlier.
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Freeze/Pwr Down is kind of a pain.
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It doesn't affect damage at all. Just hit rate.
![](52-Stairmaster_0055.jpg)
And do you know what kind of a pain it is to not hit something that's charging at you with its face?
![](53-Stairmaster_0056.jpg)
It isn't a good one.
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I wonder how long I can ramble before people realize that this is some boring shit right here.
(total stair count: 8)
~~~Backtracking!~~~
to the newly opened door. With the map in it.
![](55-Stairmaster_0058.jpg)
As so.
![](56-Stairmaster_0059.jpg)
Glorious. Simply glorious.
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Of course. Nothing useful in any of the chests.
Hell three were empty.
![](58-Stairmaster_0061.jpg)
We're almost there.
(total stair count: 9)
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The stairs lead to the other side of the electric fence.
Now I'm in the position of power!
~~~Backtracking!~~~
to the Emergency Gate.
![](60-Stairmaster_0063.jpg)
Huh. Lasers. That's new.
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Motherfucker you are going to have nothing in you and I will rage.
(hint: this is true)
~~~Backtracking!~~~
to the Missile Dog half room
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I don't like this place.
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Not at all. It has something to do with the decor, I believe.
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Maybe it's the hosts. They don't seem friendly.
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I know what it is!
IT'S ALL THE FUCKING STAIRS
(total stair count: 10)
![](66-Stairmaster_0070.jpg)
Again, this has nothing.
Splitting this in half because of massive amount of stairs.
Next time is ~~~more Backtracking!~~~
Fuck.