Part 28: TC - Turn 4

Chapter 4: Victories and Defeats

“My friends, we have strange news indeed from the fronts in our glorious patriotic war against the vile heretics!”



“Our noble forces, led by Heroes of the People Angry and Burpy, crushed the pathetic forces arrayed against them!”



“And what is more, it seems the Enemies of the People have been sighted attempting to enter the historical territory of Greater Smurfville!”



“Our mighty new hero, Belligerent Smurf, cast these mysterious giants from our lands with contemptuous ease!”



“To temper these victories, I must report tragic news: that great warrior and hero of the battles at Ivenmoor and Rivia, Burpy, has died a tragic death from HERETIC TREACHERY!”



“A moment of silence will be observed for him when the sun reaches its zenith.”

“Scouting report from Angry Smurf-
I did not know zat zere vas a social disease zat could make it actually fall off, and am glad zat buffoon Burpy found out first. Tell zem he got hit by an arrow or sumzing, and none of ze troops get leave time in horse people land now. Also zend for a new general, zis time one zat can keep it in ze pants.”

World Eating Smurf talks for Real:
I don’t really care for close analyzing battles unless something weird happened, and I don’t consider my Warriors stomping a bunch of generic Hinnom giants into the dirt that weird. I’m sure Hinnom will have more weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth on his end. I’m pretty sure that was Hinnom’s starting army I pounded, it’s really not a shocker that my dual wielding high defense sacreds defeated normal giants without some kind of special giant gimmick like a cold aura or something.

Let’s take a look at what I’m up to this turn.



So, I’ve beaten Hinnom’s army. There’s a school of thought that I could try to capitalize and attack, but that’s really madness at this point. I have no idea who my other neighbors are, but I know I’ve got one pretty close given those two enemy candles that can’t possibly be Hinnom’s. I also have no idea how close someone might be north. So my real goal and gain out of defeating Hinnom there was that I can cut him off completely from any further northern expansion and potentially secure a lot of land for myself that he might otherwise have contested. I also talk with Hinnom’s player, buildscharacter, on IRC quite a lot, which tends to help diffuse any tensions that might come out of misunderstandings. Even if Hinnom HAD taken this without me moving there this turn I’d have insisted on having it, since it’s in my capitol circle.

One annoying thing is that the actual leader of my other expansion army, Burpy Smurf, caught an arrow and got diseased last turn. I guess he only had one HP left after this, so the disease killed him. Love of god. This means I need to send a new leader, the Celestial Master I recruited last turn, instead of having that Master start researching. It sucks, but it does let me mass up some more Warriors than I had before thanks to the higher leadership of Celestial Masters.