Part 34: Update Thirty Three: Bone Bone Bone
Welcome back! Last time, on Earthbound, I got my ass kicked. Today, I'm not going to get my ass kicked so, let's get started.
Alright, we've gotta track down Monotoli. If we go to his building to do it directly, his security response is going to be hard and fast. If Kim were here, I wouldn't be concerned; since we're missing our PSI fueled death machine, I'm not quite feeling brave enough to launch a full-scale assault.
But, remember when we first arrived, how we heard rumor that Monotoli sometimes hung out at Jackie's Cafe?
Let's head over there; maybe Monotoli will have decided to drop in for a quick
But, first, I head too far into the city and completely miss the cafe.
So, hey, how about a new enemy to make up for it?
This guy is fairly un-extraordinary. 288 HP, with decent defense and offense, he's either grumbling at someone or lecturing them to lower their guts, punching them in the jaw, or wobbling around.
Like the Annoying Old Party Men, I'm fairly certain Nass and Susan are just beating up a drunk man.
And to think, he could safely claim a kid with a laser gun shot him and everyone will just reply, "Yeah, right, Tom. Did your friend Jack introduce you two?"
This man is fairly harmless, but that is one hell of a guts drop.
Not a bad bit of exp., but remember, we're only splitting it two ways instead of three now.
After a little bit, I get back on track.
Hmm...That lady has moved. Does she had anything different to say now?
I'm glad she could tell me, as I am unable to hear it.
: "Take me out to the ballgame" at the stadium.
Everdred! No!
Out of my way, jerkwad, he's an old friend! Kind of. Well, he gave me a bunch of money once, but that's good enough for friendship in my book!
What!? Why do I have to do that?
Here, take Sudden Guts Pill. She has served me well in the past.
I don't think it matters what you give him (as long as it's not along the likes of the ATM Card and etc.), as he skedaddles immediately.
Oh, hell, this isn't good. I think Everdred is on his way out.
: You are Nass, aren't you? It's me, we met in Twoson... Everdred from Burglin Park. You must remember. I'm the best thief around.In all fairness, Everdred, you're the only thief that I know. And have met.
Don't worry, Everdred, we took care of him.
: Mani Mani. It's a strange-colored, doll-looking thing. ...Ohh...*wheeze*, I'm in pain...and ....Monotoli tricked me and stole it...Ah-ha. So that's how Monotoli gained all of his power so quickly.
: He gets his evil power from that statue! ...Listen! I'll tell you only once. At the cafe, check... behind... the counter... ...*Gasp*... I said I'd tell you only once... But if you insist, I'll tell you once more... ...*gasp gasp* Do do do you wanna hear it again?No, Everdred. Rest now.
Y'know, if I do another LP after this, I'm going to have to find another RPG with a haiku.
Haikus from fan-favorite characters. I mean, everyone does love Everdred, right?
Don't worry, Everdred. I'm pretty sure you and I aren't going to the same place when we die.
Wait, what?
Oh, Everdred, you sly dog.
The people around are, understandably, a little freaked out about Everdred.
Yeah, we're friends. Maybe I'll see him again someday.
Hey, you just saw me walk out of there. How do you know I'm not on my way to volunteer for the church?
Says the man who immediately enters the
Ah-ha, we've found something intere
esting--
Welcome to Moonside.
No, of course you aren't. My mistake.
Yes, I think I'm awake.
Ah, yes.
OOh, an enemy!
Robo-pumps are huge threats.
Their HP is 431, with high defense. No weaknesses, however. Bashing is the way to go.
When their countdown reaches zero, they throw a Bomb. Bombs hurt.
Dammit, Nass.
Before the bash is riddled, victory will ensue.
The exp. is nice here in Moonside.
Ah, no, no.
So many people wandering around!
309 HP, with good attacks and low defense. They're weak to Freeze, as the game continues to taunt me with Kim's absence.
This is it's main attack; it hits both characters for good damage, and it's 3/4ths of its action list.
Oof! Why do water blasts seem to deal so much damage?
But, as long as you keep up the damage, it's an easy enough fight. Just be sure to watch out for the gigantic blast of water. Especially if they're with other enemies.
Their exp. is pretty nice, too.
Nice enough to get Nass a level!
For this level, Nass Oh, baby! Offense +4, defense +2, speed +1, guts +1, IQ +2, luck +1, HP +2, and PP +4.
As the cucumbers freeze, the life is restored.
Being able to get the drop on anything here is good. Every enemy is dangerous in their own way, especially if certain ones get paired up.
Thankfully, most of my fights were solo ones, so I didn't have much danger from random encounters here.
Thank you!
Tankh yuo!
Ytnk aou!
No, I don't understand a thing!
Me too. I'm glad you were here to help.
Oh, hello!
What?
Whoaholycrap
Where the hell am I now?
And what's wrong with that clock?
Oh, a Dali's Clock. Of course. I should have guessed.
Their offense and defense isn't very good. They only have 296 HP, too.
But make no mistake. These guys are dangerous, if short-lived.
They freeze your ass in ti
me and proceed to attack. I've seen them several more times than once during that period. Their single attacks are nothing to fear, but three or four in a row? Now that's dangerous.
Also, look at those eyes. Inverted or regular, they are considering the best way to rip your soul from the bonds of your body.
And they drop crap experience, too.
Tolerate the foibles of boxes and reap their sown gifts.
Their invert reminds me of those Gyroids from Animal Crossing.
Oh, God, now I'm thinking about Chewbot's Animal Crossing LP!
There's an invisible barrier here, so Nass can't travel any further forward. It stretches a good distance, plus they're everywhere in Moonside.
It makes avoiding encounters difficult, at times, but since the encounters are quite manageable, it's not too big of an issue. That encounter there was no issue, either.
However, this confused me. I don't know if it's just the invisible wall causing the issue here or what. Though, we are in Moonside...
whoajesuschrist
Well, alright, teleported me an entire fifteen feet. Perfect.
...I don't think I appreciate what you're saying here, pal.
: Yeah, me neither!
: Yum...Oh, I got some on your shoes. Sorry.
Quickly, Nass, flee before he realizes it!
Ah, yes, save me Hello and Goodbye Man!
...Thanks a lot, asshole. Maybe that man there will be more helpful.
: Now I know what a TV dinner feels like.
I'd like to see you try.
: Well, Dad gets dental through work, but my sister has this weird eyebrow thing.
Not the worst pick up line I've heard, but it's close.
...Alright, now that's gotta be the worst.
Ooh, dinosaurs!
Oh, hey, a Malkavian.
Why must all the hoops be on fire?
The museum is rather small. And partially on fire. Bone.
Bone?
Bones bones.
Bone!
Bone's bone, bone.
Until I acquiesce Bone's bone.
Aww, I meant no for liking bones!
Bones!
Museum bone time is over. Let us return to the streets.
Cinnamontittymarymagdalene!
The hospital works pretty much as normal, but the healer finally gets a chair to sit on. Suck on that, rich doctor!
: Hmm...I find this piece shallow and pedantic.: Ah, yes, shallow and pedantic.
Abstract Arts have 301 HP, but their offense and defense isn't really great enough to render them a threat on their own. As for their attacks, they're either bashing you or using Hypnosis Alpha.
They're pretty easy to drop, all things told. Like other Moonside enemies, they're more dangerous when paired up with something else.
But their exp. is really good for the threat they pose.
And Susan gains a level from it!
For this level, he gained +1 defense, +1 IQ, and +1 HP.
Hmm...We found something insignificant in Threed...
Well, I guess this lady could fill that quota.
No, no, I knew this. Thank you, though.
Damn. Nothing significantly insignificant here. Or is there?
The layout in Moonside is a touch different from that of Fourside. But, it's very convenient the hospital and hotel are side-by-side, just in case you need either.
It's still $75 a night to sleep at the hotel, too.
The rush of air expels the life from the boys, shedding their bodies from this mortal coil. They were never found...
Nah, I'm just playin' foolsies!
There is wonderful reception in Moonside, by the way.
I've been better, yes. Oh, and the phone? It's jumping all over and it's hard to make a call.
This shop here isn't a bad place to stock up if you need to.
Of course!
Oh, Moonside, you've tricked me again.
Doing it correctly--
Hey, wait, I'm not done expla--
--Aww, fiddlesticks. It works like a regular hotel.
They've even got one of these guys!
Headlines are still prevalent here in Moonside, so be sure to check them often.
: Man, there's something weird going on here, Susan.: He was our old partner, y'know.
Outside of the hotel, we continue our exploration.
Ooh, another teleport man! Let's see where he takes us.
Well, uh, not right now I don't!
whoathisisntsurprisinganymore
butwhatifitalktoanotherguywhoteleportsbecausetherewasnothinginterestingoverwhereiwassentbefore
Dammit, we've already been here!
Ooh, a present and somebody new to talk to!
"Why am I here? Forget the questions, give me another beer!"
Excellent. Double Burgers are just about equal to a Life Up Alpha, so this is essentially 5 PP.
Holycrapmoreteleporting
This present box is special.
It holds, finally, a new piece of armor for the body.
Do not let the myriad pinpricks of light enter your veins, for they will shatter the synapses.
Nass gets it, as he is tougher and team healer right now. Keeping the healer alive is an important RPG thing in my book.
Oh, I'm going
whoastpometheremanimani
Handbag Straps aren't bad items; they do a bit of damage to an enemy and have a chance to solidify them.
Oh, God, Pokemon Master!
Hmm...So we're going to boogie down at a disco while being sunburnt. Interesting...
pleasereallydumpmetherestatue
Well, nobody likes cold soup. Unless it is meant to be cold. Then I guess people do like it.
Secret Herbs cure all status ailments, and can even revive a character with half of their health.
No, don't!
whoatiredjoke
Well...This doesn't look good.
Yeergh, neither does this guy.
Moonwel ot Cosidme
Who're you calling a loser, you loser?
Oh, God! I'M THE LOSER
Thankfully, there's no bathtub here.
Yeah, of course!
Aww, I was hoping for another invisible NPC helper.
I already said yes, I can!
Why does that sound like an excellent opening line to a song to me?
Maybe I'm just terrible at music.
Quit flashing your grill at me!
Susan needed a small boost to his HP.
I've gotta find a place to unload this guy. He talks too much.
: Wow, they're like Tracy's!
So, we've got a bit of journeying to do...
After getting lost for a minute, I wind my way back here.
Not today, assbutt!
I think everyone needs a friend with a gold tooth and connected eyebrows. They're such good people persons!
Alright, the Mani Mani is right over there.
Let the loops of the past vary the twists of the future before the butter churns.
Have at thee!
Alright, folks, here is the boss of Moonside.
He has 860 HP, and I should have some Big Bottle Rockets, but I'm not going to let a bit of ill preparedness slow me down here. I start with Nass throwing a Shield Beta on Susan, as Mani Mani can dish out some good physical damage.
860 HP isn't really a lot, but Mani Mani's defense is pretty impressive.
Shield Beta reflects half of the damage you take back at the attacker, so it'll add a bit here and there. It also reduces damage taken by half.
Mani Mani also has Magnet Alpha, along with a few other powers.
Susan's Great Charm prevents the paralysis here; Nass is wearing the Night Pendant, but that's not an active detriment here, as you'll see soon enough.
I don't think it's possible to seal off his PSI powers, but I'll be damned if I didn't try.
Every time one of Susan's inventions doesn't work, I can just hear the "Failure..." from the Smash Bros. announcer in my head.
Nass shields himself next. He'll start attacking soon, which'll severely increase the speed of this fight.
Like I said, it won't reflect a ton of damage, but every little bit helps.
Mani Mani's defense is 145, by the way. He's fucking tough.
He kept trying to paralyze Susan, too, which is essentially a free turn for me.
Susan's lack of defense is showing; that was halved, and thank God. Mani Mani takes 23 in return, for those of you terrible at division.
I'm starting to see why Nass didn't get a weapon upgrade. If he was hitting for even just 20 more HP of damage a round, this fight would be so much easier.
So, let's really fuck up his day.
Not quite the psychic destruction that Kim can mete out, but it's still pretty good damage.
A Big Bottle Rocket or two would have utterly trivialized this fight, though.
Uh-oh. This attack is equal to a high-leveled Flash, and I believe it can one-hit KO somebody, but has a very low chance to do so. The Night Pendant doesn't take any of this PSI Flash bullshit, which is another reason why I equipped it on Nass.
Feeling strange is sort of like confusion, and since your party's defense is nothing like Mani Mani's, this can be bad. Not to mention Shield Beta is still up...
Healing Beta will clear it right up, though.
Alright, he still has a chance to hit Mani Mani...
Nass takes a laser bolt to the chest startlingly well, though.
Susan takes his bit, too.
Nass clears it up, though, as to prevent any more incidents.
Mani Mani makes another regular attack, which I can deal with.
Nass is still on healing duty for this fight and Susan's HP is starting to get worryingly low.
But, a touch of Life Up Alpha is just what the doctor ordered.
Oh, you bleedin' asshole.
Oh, this isn't too bad. This allows me to test if equipping a weapon to use in battle actually results in 100% accuracy. I heard the rumor online and had been curious about it.
Aww, damn. Well, never mind on something I was considering exploiting later.
Ah, curses.
This affects everyone's PSI, removing all effects. Our shields are down, but it's late enough in the battle that I don't bother reapplying them.
I just keep a steady stream of damage going.
And I don't even worry about curing Susan's crying. This fight really isn't too terribly tough.
Mani Mani finally wised up to Susan's resistance to paralysis. Nass has no such defenses against it.
Nass may not be able to take any physical actions, but PSI isn't physical, now is it?
Well, it was worth a shot. That and I was making sure Mani Mani used all of his available attacks.
Mani Mani hits hard when you're not halving his damage.
I could have sworn Healing Beta covered paralysis, but I was wrong. I have that Secret Herb, but it's in Nass' inventory, where I can't get to it.
I waste another turn ensuring Mani Mani has used all of his attacks by healing Nass and using the Counter-PSI unit again. Well, that, and I really hoped it would work, because completely shutting down Mani Mani would be satisfying on so many levels.
After another attempt to paralyze Nass (which failed), I go back on the offensive.
Now, here, I fucked up and accidentally hit Auto Fight. You can cancel out of it, but it's still annoying.
After this, I think that covers all of Mani Mani's available actions.
Auto-Susan misses again, but Auto-Nass clears it up.
I turn off auto-fight and retake control; Susan is still just going to regularly attack.
Jesus, I should have given him Kim's Platinum Band before she left.
Susan, unappreciative of being beaten up by a statue, proceeds to blow him away with his Hyper Beam.
Nass hit himself another level!
For this level, he gained vitality +1, luck +1 +9 HP and +1 PP.
We've won this fight. Maybe we can go see about Mono--
toli now.
Whoa, we're back. Let's stop here for now. Next time, let's see what we can finally do about Monotoli, now that we've wrecked the statue. Stay tuned!