Part 56: Update Fifty Five: I Think I'd Rather Go To Jurassic Park

Welcome back! Last time, on Earthbound, we got the melody of the Seventh Sanctuary, and fell into the Lost Underworld, where, for some reason, we're tiny. We're going to explore around a bit, so let's get started.





We'll start out by heading west. There's nothing to the east of here.



We're not tiny! Everything else is gargantuan!



Whatever, we're going to save the world from the ultimate evil. I bet we can take down a dinosaur or two without much trouble.



Especially this derpy looking sumbitch.



His defenses aren't too bad, really. However, he has the most HP of a regular enemy we've encountered so far, breaking quad-digits with 1,030.



In the Jurassic Park book, Muldoon had a fucking rocket launcher to fight the raptors with, instead of those pussy shotguns they used in the movie. This screenshot basically confirms that the Heavy Bazooka is never not useful in killing something.



I included this just because I thought it was fucking awesome to think of a teenager wailing on a dinosaur with a sword.





Oof! This is part of the reason why they dump so much exp. on you in Lumine Hall. Several posters were quick to point this out and here, I thought I had been clever when I thought of that.



These guys aren't too bad to fight, though. They're weak to fire, have resistance against anything else, and nearly all of their attacks constitute some manner of kicking your ass. The only one that doesn't inflicts solidification.



One goon, KKKLIP ART, compared this area to the department store. I can't help but feel that he's right, as the enemies here are pretty much capable of kicking your ass if you're not careful. It's easier than the department store, though, since you're a lot more powerful and you have four members, two with healing abilities, as opposed to just two people, one of whom was fragile as shit and the other slow as shit, so healing was a touch more difficult.



Ah, there are some Tenda over there. And one of those phone-birds.



There's quite a bit of danger around, so these places can save your life.



This is the benefit of having the Tendakraut with us. All of the Tenda we meet down here think we smell awesome.



There are actual earthquakes around here. I didn't capture a .gif of it, as you can just shake your screen or hold down F11 to get the same effect. And if you're using a Mac, I don't know what buttons to push to get that effect.

Anyways, he goes on to explain that there are hot springs around here that erupt when the earthquakes go off. There are two kinds of hot springs; Blue and Red. Blue springs restore HP and PP, while Red springs heal status effects. So there's yet another full heal spot that's completely free.



Just in case you weren't sure that was a phone, and I'd understand if you didn't, this guy confirms it.



Jesus Christ, Dad. We're nearly past the point where there's not a ton left to buy, but it's still good to know we have the money around if we need it.



I was talking with another goon one night about how there's no real money sinks in this game. He and I discussed the possibility of there being more real estate purchases to make, each with a chapter of the story we found in Onett's house inside.



The final house would be on sale in Summers, for $200,000. It would be an outhouse, essentially, but with the final chapter of the story.



That's a present box up there. Once again, I wouldn't blame you if you didn't realize it at first, since, well...It doesn't look anything like a present box.



There's a few treasures scattered around here and they're pretty good. Brain Food Lunches are very valuable and worthwhile restoration items.



We head further south, enjoying the bitchin' tunes.



Mountains (or something, since we're underground) block off where we can't go. This area is actually pretty fucking big and you move along slowly. I'm sure to Nass and co. they're moving along at the normal pace, but since everything has suddenly become jumbo-sized, it actually seems like they're going so slow.



We're heading east now.



There's nothing over in this area that I found.



Enemy encounters aren't too common around here, but they're frequent enough to make you realize that you're never truly safe unless you're inside one of the enclosures.



After defeating another dinosaur, Kim gains herself a level!

For this level, she gained +2 offense, +1 defense, oh, baby! +4 speed, +1 vitality, oh, baby! +4 IQ, +2 luck, +9 HP and that rocks! +18 PP!



She also learns the final PSI Fire power. It still targets a single row, but deals over 300 damage to every enemy in that row. Sadly enough, that's not really a lot of damage, so Fire still isn't the most useful of powers.



We head back northeast, moving past the first enclosure we found.



Nass, in this fight, steps up and SMAAAAAAAAAASHES the Wetnosaur for a hell of a lot of damage.



While Kim demos her new ability. It has a pretty sweet animation and deals decent damage, but I think it'd be more useful if it dealt about 150-200 points of damage more.



There's a present box to the north of here. You can barely see the bottom of it.



Oh, man, this thing is sweet. It's probably the best treasure to find down here.



It's a nice improvement for Kim, but the five points of defense isn't what makes it awesome.



The big three of assholery that enemies can throw at us is resisted by Kim now. Paralysis isn't too bad, since if it hits Nass, Kim or Poo, they can just PSI anything to death, or in Nass and Poo's cases, they can heal it up.



We head back south and around the rocks.



Heading north around that lake, we find another present box.



Nass takes this immediately. It's pretty nice since his offense is so high, it'll help him get a few more SMAAAAAAAAASH attacks here and there.



Ooh! An actual village and another rock!



But first, north of there, there's a Hot Springs. It's to the west of where I am, and it kind of looks like an anthill. It's a Red spring.



Oh, Goddammit, Pokey isn't dead!?



Though, this is an interesting callback to the beginning of the game. If you'll remember, he told Nass if he didn't come to help him look for Picky, he'd say something that would cut him like a knife.



This is our town down here; it has shopping and a hotel.



As we approach, one Tenda takes notice of us.



These guys aren't shy, like the Tenda up top were.



"Inside" the dinosaur cage? Are you sure you understand how cages work?



They keep things inside of somewhere. Not you inside, where the creatures are outside. Though, I think I've been playing and thinking about Earthbound too much lately; if I think about it, I can totally make sense of what this guy is saying.



He introduces himself as the boss and--



Immediately robs us. Just as we get to town. Suddenly, I'm reminded of the children in Fallout 2.



: I don't understand what he's talking about.

I'm sure we will, though. Oh, the awful smell surrounding us is gone, too.



Here's the hotel around here; since there are free heals outside, I decline his offer. Though, if you weren't expecting the enemies to be strong down here and had a rough time of it getting here, this man could be a Godsend.



Once again, are you sure you understand how cages work?



: He's just spewing out of his cake hole.

Alright, someone who's not crazy! And another one of my favorite lines in the entire game.



The store is this little guy right here. He actually accepts cash, instead of trading for Horns of Life.



Hmm. I'm a touch low on funds. I'm also a touch high on crap I need to sell.



Not a huge boost, but every point counts. And, as you can see, I didn't have anything particularly valuable to sell, either. Nass would still benefit from one of those coins he's selling.



Is it considered feeding them if they just swoop in out of nowhere and gobble you up?



This guy has a speech similar to the foreign business man in the Deep Darkness, and he also serves as the cash withdrawal down here. His policy is the same as the cash man's in the Deep Darkness.



But, since I can afford a $20,000 loss, I don't worry about the handling fees and just take out the money. Also, the extra cash I have here comes from selling the Hall of Fame Bat.



The same, my ass.



Yeah, we had to bring them a book to help 'em get over it.



Erm...Maybe? I can't tell the difference.

: They're still shy, though.



And with that, I'm done wasting time in the village. Let's get to talking with this rock. Strap in, he's got a lot of coming at you.



Does a talking rock really have to tell someone to listen?



Then again, this is Earthbound-world. Talking rocks might be blase or something.



Remember back when Buzz Buzz told us it was his opinion that Nass was one of the boys destined to save the world? He was right on the money with that.



: universe. There will be a time in which all of you in the universe will overlap each other. ...It's not necessary to understand now. Do you remember "Giant Step" in Onett? That is one of "Your Sanctuary." It is a spot which gives you power and allows you to realize all your skills. There was a monster that protected it. The monster was influenced by the power of the place. You must have beaten those monsters. You must reach all of the eight power spots in the world... When the Sound Stone records the melodies of all eight power spots, you can finally see "Your World." I'll tell you of all the power spots.

Here, he just lists off the seven spots we've already been to. No new information there, really, so let's just skip to the eighth spot.



This is the final one, too. We're nearly done with our quest.



It possibly has my favorite boss of the Sanctuary spots, too.



We're nearly done with that tune, too.



Absolutely. Gather all the music, fuck up the bad guy's plans, save the world, get the girl. What's not to get, boss?



And that's the end of his speech.



C'mon, we've got another Sanctuary to go liberate.



Jesus Christ!



Meet the Chomposaur. This should be your first action when you fight these guys. They start with a reflective physical shield. At this point, you might be used to having Nass bashing and Susan firing the Heavy Bazooka to start off fights with. These guys are assholes and if you attempt to beat them to death before dropping their shields, you might just get your ass killed.



These guys have bitchin' physical offense and good defense, too.



They also have 1,288 HP to tear through. They're not weak to anything, and Fire is only 25% effective on them.



Blasting them with high level PSI is recommended, as they have all the way up to Fire Gamma to assault the entire party with. For us, it's not a ton of damage to the enemy, but it'll put the hurt on everyone in the part. Except for Kim and Susan, since they have fire protection; it'll be single to low double digit damage for them.



Y'know, he looks delightfully doesn't he?



I don't mind seeing Fire Beta launched at us.





Since Poo and Nass both have enough health to just tank through the fire PSI.



But, keep up your health and your assault, and these guys will fall easily enough.



I included this shot simply because I think I saw something like this in my nightmares.



These guys are tough and their exp. reward is proportionally high, too.



Nass gains a level due to it and get ready, because this is one hell of a level.

For his sixty-eighth level, oh, baby! Offense +5, defense +1, oh, baby! +3 speed, oh, baby! +3 guts, oh, baby! +3 vitality, +1 luck, sweet! +41 HP and +1 PP.

Now that's what I call a fucking level!



Poo also hit himself a level, and starts out with a respectable +2 to offense. He also gained +1 defense, +1 IQ, +2 HP and +1 PP.



That cave is interesting, but it's not where we're going right now. We'll check it out in a little bit, I promise.



We head south of that cave, toward the Eighth Sanctuary.



But first, a pretty good contender for the best item to find down here.



Poo's final bit of equipment.





That's a beautiful sight, and one that some of you may have never seen before. The Cloak of Kings offers no special protection, but in addition to the +20 defense it offers, it also offers +40 speed.



Heading further south, we see another Hot Spring. It's blue this time, so we could stand to hit it.



But, as you can see here, we can't just approach it after it's blown.



You've got to step on the spot before the earthquake starts. You can't move during earthquakes, either, so you've got to be ready and waiting for it.





Susan and Poo's HP has really taken a nice upturn. Nass still has more HP and Susan and Kim put together, but just barely. All in all, these are pretty good numbers to be seeing for HP/PP.



Alright, another cage area to get out of the cage.



: ...Except now I can't get out.

I'm actually really impressed you made it down here all by yourself, Tenda. I'm not sure if any of my guys could have done it solo.



And this is where we're taking our break, too.

Next time, on Earthbound, we'll tackle the Eighth Sanctuary. Stay tuned!