Part 33: Hitting the Fourth Wall with a Multi-Bottle Rocket
Part 30: Hitting the Fourth Wall with a Multi-Bottle Rocket
Yeah, that's right. This update is completely out of character. There's just too much awesome stuff in this game to get across in a narrative Let's Play. So, I'm going to walk you through what is one of my favorite parts of any video game, ever: Post-Giygas Earthbound.
Earthbound is one of those rare games that puts you in control of the player character after you beat the last boss.
After reading the letters from your friends and family, Paula asks you to escort her home.
What I like to do instead, is to teleport back to the Lost Underworld, the last new area the game offers, and walk back (as much as you can walk, anyway) through the entire world, in reverse order, talking to everyone along the way.
Here's the talking rock. Having guided Ness to Fire Spring and helped him save the world, he goes back to being just a regular rock.
The Tenda nearby don't seem too happy about this.
And the no-longer-shy Tendas from up above will rejoin their brothers down in the Underworld. Yay for unity.
The Tenda chief will also give you the book back, and you can return it to the library in Onett.
Poo welcomes you to his palace in Dalaam.
Unfortunately nothing happens if you go up to Poo's Mu training spot.
And alas, Brick Road remains stuck in the palm trees forevermore.
Back in Summers, the Stoic Club has closed, and in its place is the "Lazy Cowpoke Stop'n'Go".
You can ride back and forth with the Sea Captain for $20 a head.
In Winters, Tony accuses you of trying to keep Jeff from calling him. Out of all the characters, I really have to feel sorry for Jeff. Whenever they show everyone's family and loved ones, all poor Jeff has is this mincing little stalker. Jeff has called Maxwell, so Tony's even more jealous.
And, you can ride Tessie across the lake with the Bubble Monkey's help.
In Fourside, Mr. Monotoli has retired, and returned control of his company to Mr. Enrich Flavor, who you might remember as the grumpy man in Jackie's Café who used to be Monotoli's boss.
Monotoli has taken a job as a simple elevator operator, which is confusing since the blonde lady is still inside the elevator, and you still have to talk to her to ride the elevator up and down.
Meanwhile, in Jackie's Café, Pokey's dad, Aloysius Minch, is drowning his sorrows in family-friendly coffee (nope, not booze at all) after being ditched by his son. He asks you not to tell his wife where he is.
Threed is pretty much the same. A lot of this stuff is available as soon as you clear out the zombie infestation.
I missed this house in Happy-Happy Village during my playthrough, but you can knock on the door to see Mr. Saturn's unique font way before Saturn Valley. Now, he'll let you in.
If you invested the money in Orange Kid, he'll ask you to be patient for a little while longer while he finishes his great invention. If you didn't, I think he'll taunt you about how it's too late for you to invest in his genius.
And here in Twoson, you have another choice. You can either drop Paula off at her house, or bring her with you back to Onett. If you get too close to the door, though, the game makes your choice for you.
She takes forever to say goodbye and go inside.
Paula's mom says you need to come over more often, and she's working on learning to cook your favorite food.
Her dad says that he thinks you should keep dating Paula, as long as you treat her right. He also upgrades you from sleeping on the couch in the den to the couch in the living room! Movin' on up, Ness!
Oddly enough, Paula herself is the least friendly person at the preschool. She pretty much tells you to go home and see your mom. I kept two save states so I could get shots of this, but as you can see from the storyline updates, I kept Paula around until the end.
The hoods in Burglin Park tell you not to believe that Everdred's gone. Who the hell knows what's up with him.
Captain Strong is a much sillier character than my LP made him out to be. After you beat the game, there's an article in the paper that says "Police captain finishes EarthBound, asks, 'Where's the sequel?'" Over a decade later, we're still asking the same thing.
One of the neatest things in the game is over here, overlooking the scenic bluffs of Onett. Besides the trumpet player, there's a guy selling a house. Of course you can't buy it when you're first going through Onett, and since my playthrough involved spending as little time as possible there, I'm just now getting around to buying it.
Of course, it's a horrible wreck with huge holes in the floor and an entire wall missing. But there's a magazine article hidden in the dresser that's worth reading.
I was neither a murder suspect, nor a target for an international spy organization. But I drove a car down the Jersey Turnpike at 80 mph. ...A police officer pulled me over and asked for my driver's license. He said I was going 20 mph over the speed limit. I instantly pointed to my wife and said, "I'm in a hurry, my wife is in labor." Fortunately my wife actually had a big stomach. I hoped he'd let me go with this excuse. "Oh, since it's an emergency, I'll lead you to the hospital with my police car," he said.
"No, it's not necessary."
"Why not?" asked the officer.
"Let's get going," said the officer...
"No, no! We can't! This baby is a demon child!"
Frank, having broken up the Sharks, has a job flipping burgers at the local restaurant. He says he's also working out to start his pro-wrestling ("wrasslin") career.
And here at the library you can return the Shyness book to the librarian, who will also give you a kiss as a reward. Ness sure does have a way with the ladies.
Things have also changed at Pokey's house. With Aloysius and Pokey gone, Lardna (Yeah, her name is really Lardna) has shacked up with this weird guy, Mr. Prettyman, who tells you to keep working hard to get your family out of debt.
You can have some fun with the phone at this point too. You can't save, but if you call your dad, he'll joke about how he doesn't need to tell you your Exp. to the next level anymore. He'll then say he's working hard to come home for Ness' birthday, which is next week.
Mach Pizza is no more! Shocking, isn't it?
And if you call the old Stoic Club number, you of course get the Lazy Cowpoke Stop'n'Go.
Tracy is hilarious. She rubs your face in how much schoolwork you've missed, then says she's saved some money and "we'll do the lunch thing sometime." Yeah, she's actually supposed to be younger than Ness.
Well...At this point, there's not much left to do but talk to your mom and start the ending sequence. I'm sure I still left a lot out...So anyone who's reading this and still hasn't played Earthbound, seriously, go play it.
Now, I mentioned something about a contest, didn't I? Yeah, so here it goes. This one is gonna be pretty hard. Throughout this entire thread, there have been two instances where I had to photoshop screenshots, because of some continuity error I missed while playing. The first person to point 'em out to me wins a custom drawn avatar of their choice. If nobody gets it, I'll pick my favorite guess as the winner. Alright? Get crackin'.
Now! A lot of people were asking about this earlier - the artwork I did for the portrait pictures. So without further ado, here are my portraits. I ended up with seven of them. They were drawn much bigger than you get to see them in the thread, so if you've been longing for an avatar of one of these pictures, this is the version to use. Go nuts.
Yeah, you might notice that some of the old pictures, like Ness' first portrait, Pokey, Picky, and Buzz Buzz are missing...Unfortunately I didn't have the foresight to save the fullsize versions of the portraits in the first draft of the thread. Sorry about that. Also the portrait of Paula with the mushroom on her head, I drew that over her existing, already-framed portrait, so there's not a higher-res version of that either.
And here's some pictures I drew that I never had a reason to post. They were made to match the picture of Ness from the very first chapter, but aside from Jeff, none of the kids ever got to narrate a chapter, so I never had a reason to post them.
Finally, this thread is drawing to a close. I'll avoid being long-winded here, so I'll just say thanks to everyone that's read my thread. Thanks to everyone that voted it, thanks to everyone that entered the Starstorm Challenge, and thanks to everyone who helped me out back in February when I first posted this weird chimera of LP and fan-fiction in the Sandcastle. Special thanks to my girlfriend, for putting up with me drawing psychic thirteen year olds for the last four months or so.
I'm definitely taking a few weeks off to catch up on some gamin' with my brand-new X-Box 360, but...There's a pretty good chance I'll revisit the Mother universe in this subforum before too long. This thread has left a real mark on me, and I doubt I'll be able to stay away forever.
Welp, that's the thread everyone. I'm gonna leave this open, to facilitate contest entries, fan arts, and any Earthbound-related discussion. Thanks again! It's been real.