Part 23: Fallout 3 - an alternate timeline by Orv

Now hold on there just one bloody minute, that's not how I remember it at all! It all started a few weeks back...



You see, there were these rather irate chaps called the Brotherhood of Who Cares You Daft Gits Point That Gun Somewhere Else.



The idiot who just happens to carry me decided to follow them into-

Hey Reginald, I don't remember this part!

Shut up you blithering imbecile! As I was saying, he decided to follow them through some ruins, running into all manner of terrible beasts!









Authentic military tactics!



I heard your radio signal and thought I'd come and help.

Why don't you head inside and talk to Protector McGraw? I'll radio ahead and let him know you're coming.



This rather brash ponce met us at the bottom of the elevator.



Oh very well, we'll follow you through this dingy base of yo-



Oh, oh, can we keep it?!

No you blatherskite, pipe down.



I'll be perfectly honest, I'd trust a Wastelander to shine my Power Armor and even that's pushing it.

But... you do have that computer there on your wrist. Hmph. I can see now that Morrill made the right call. Maybe you can be useful after all...

I'll show you useful you limpwristed c-

Intelligence So, my Pip-Boy makes me unique and you need my help because of that...

I'll keep it simple. I need you, and I need that computer of yours. You help me out, and I'll do what I can to help you.

This isn't an offer the Outcasts extend to anyone, so you should really think carefully about it.

Well, what do you want me to do?

Records indicate there's some high-value tech in this base, but we can't get to it. The armory is sealed by a blast door, and we can't get it open.

Hah, these buffoons can't even open a blast door! Let me at it, I'll show them what's what!

We're pretty sure anyone who completes the simulation program will gain access, but it requires a certain interface. Like your Pip-Boy.

I need you to go in the simulator and complete the program... which will unlock the armory. Do that and you'll get a share of the gear.

Simulation? Like... a computer simulation? Of what?



I won't lie to you. It's heavy combat, protocols disengaged. That means you die in the sim... your body goes into massive cardiac arrest.

Just as long as someone gets me off this idiots corpse!

You're still listening, so I'm going to assume you're still interested. But time's wasting. Sibley can take you to the pod. Olin will brief you.

If you want to walk away, you're free to leave. My men won't try to stop you.

Not that they could! Old boy sure does enjoy the sound of his own voice.





How very... dapper.





Oh bloody hell what have you gotten me into you dipsti-



...I am going to kill you Lizard.

It's cold Reginald! Hold me!

Oh I'll hold your intestines alright!

I missed the conversation with Ben, my apologies.





Oh my, an actual Communist. I've heard about these, Lizard! They're like daedra, but stupider! Stab it, quickly!

Whatever you say Reginald!





Intriguing! These little red pods appear to restore the matrix of your existence! Try to remember where these are, Lizard.



Atta-boy Lizard, get 'i-



How you haven't shot yourself in the face is a mystery to me Lizard.



That's more like it!




He just disappeared Reginald! I wanted his gun!

It's a simulation you horrible waste of brain cells.



Oh, oh my. Now this I can work with.

A short time later without any good screen captures.







Maybe now you'll stop breaking your nails every time you punch someone!




Good gracious I am a sexy machine!



Watch your step Lizard, I quite like my current outfit.



What have you done Lizard?! My pristine bolt action is gone! Rack the slide you fool!



Reginald, caves never end well...

Well we don't have much of a choice do we old boy? It's all rather linear around these parts. Go on then!



Next time on the Misadventures of Reginald and Lizard Wizard 2.0, we explore a whole lot of of shitty caves and bunkers, and shoot more Communists!