Part 22: Page 22: The Two Towers

Page 22: The Two Towers

Well, really only one tower. ANYWAY...



Cid's ship will take us to the tower so that we can finish all those picture books.



Well, damn. We can't return to the tower until we go visit the square. I just love that, don't you?


The Decisive Battle

Here we are at the square. It's... kinda different this time...

By the way, the overall soundtrack is now The Decisive Battle for pretty much everywhere unless we're in a book or something similar.

Maybe this won't be so easy after all...

Hmmm... If my instincts are right, then this altar is...

Altar? Do you know what's going on?

A long, long time ago, my grandma told me something very interesting... This island is the center of the world!

Center of the world!? That doesn't make sense! Was this before or after you checked her into the loony bin?

Oh, Croma Never stop.

Think about an apple for a second. There's the part of an apple that acts as a link to the tree--and via that, all the other apples. This island does the exact same thing!

But what does that mean?



It must be the world of darkness that Bebuzzu talked about.

Man, now I just want it to be the world of ice cream or something and have Cid be so wrong.

We've got to put a stop to his nefarious plans once and for all!

Cid tries to enter the beam of light. Unfortunately for him, he's not a Protagonist^TM and as such can't enter.



Are you okay?

What are we gonna do!? We don't have time for this!



You don't, but I do. Fuck saving the world, I have stories to read. I could walk all the way to Cid's ship, but using Bluebay saves me time.



We're going in chronological order, so we're starting at the bottom and working our way up. First up: Rescue on the Rapids.



This is our only challenge left - a lot of the story books in the tower only have a few left. I guess I got lucky or something.


Fiddle de Chocobo
Rescue on the Rapids Versus 5

Same as the others, though Volg is actually a challenge this time. Use him to your advantage: once you're in front of him, try to stay literally in front of him. He'll push you along and drop speed.



It was closer than I'd have like, of course, but that's because I don't like having the AI anywhere near my score.


Victory

The gap was 30 milliseconds. That's not something I'm entirely confident with, though it worked out in the end.



And of course, the final epilogue for the book comes from the final challenge.


Prelude
The Adamantoise and the Cactuar: Rescue on the Rapids Epilogue - Winter Woe

"No fear! No fear! I'm outta here!"
Soon after departing, the cactuar lost control of his raft, which was casting into some rocks by the raging waters.
"Help! Help! I'm allergic to kelp!"
Suddenly, the gigantic whale Bismarck emerged from the depths of the river and opened his titanic maw, waiting for the cactuar to lose his grip. Luckily, the equally amphibious adamantoises were able to rescue the cactuar before he was served up as Bismarck's mid-afternoon snack.
Or at least that's what they thought...



Crash!

In the next instant, Bismarck swallowed up the cactuar and the adamantoises! "Whew! That was a close one! I spent all my midsummer days frolicking and almost ended up with nothing for the winter!"
With plenty of food for the upcoming season, Bismarck swam off, as happy a whale as there ever was.

Bahah. Okay, that's good.



The Bismarck chest opens up. All that's left is the Ramuh chest, and I'm sure you all know where that's coming from.



The floor above this one, we have to finish up The Three Little Piggies. Fortunately, this one's only one video long as well.


Battle Theme
Hide and Shriek Versus 5

I love AI pathing, don't you? It's possible to trick Volg and the Tonberries into running along the shack; this helps because you can just sit back there while Volg gets beaten badly. It's not cheating, it's exploiting the system. Anyway, it's either that or run away constantly.



Again, we are victorious.


Victory

And with that, we've finished up The Three Little Piggies.




We get Karma for not taking damage. Kinda tempted to put it in the deck because those things are so cute



Very vell done, Boco! You've got zat vicked Bebuzzu on za run! He is shaking in fear as your promise as a varrior grows and grows. I could feel his spirits vaning from inside za card. Now I vill help you! I am very vise in za vay of the cards. Come by so I can assist you in your quest.

We're not gonna need him. Zpoiler alert.



On the clock floor is the first book of the - wait, does that say 2 wins? Huh. I thought I played more than that.


Fiddle de Chocobo
Lightning-Fast Labyrinth Versus 5

Ramuh just looks somewhat pissed. Also, he's a dick



Poor Volg. Poor, poor guy.


Victory

Hey, remember how I mentioned wanting a bigger gap between scores? This is that.



This is, I believe, our second-last Chocobo friend to rescue. I could be wrong (and probably am)...



Bebuzzu may have almost taken my life, but you've given me back MY FREEDOM! I'm gonna pull all the stops and help you out with my full arsenal of mega hints! I'll be at the house by the western cliff, so come by when you have the chance!

Sure thing, dude. Also, while we need to talk to him for rewards, we don't need any of his hints.



Also, this is still super precarious.


The Decisive Battle

Hey! I see our buddy!



Hi, guy!

You came all the way out here just to see me? That makes me...happy! As long as you're unable to have a true handle on what happiness is, it will only wither away unnoticed! I'll give you this to make sure your happiness never withers even a bit!



Boco, do you feel happy now? Happiness is always sure to follow a smile! Even if you're feeling glum, turn that frown upside down, and you'll be merry! See you later, friend!

Bye, friend! You're the best guy.



Back to this book.



Well, okay then. Not like that's hard or anything...


Battle Theme
Shocking Shuffle Versus 4

This game's not even hard, it's just tedious at this point.



I really don't care if you skip these next videos. They're super boring.


Victory

And we still have one more to go...



I remember this guy. He killed me when I was fighting Core Bebuzzu.



And we get an epilogue for beating Versus 4. How could this day get any better?


Prelude
Mini Red Riding Hood: Shocking Shuffle Epilogue - Heartfelt Gift

Dodging fierce lightning bolts, Red chased after Ramuh and his getaway cloud. When she finally caught up with Ramuh and her grandmother, they were inside a beautiful garden.



Ramuh had prepared the assortment of flowers as an apology for frightening Red's grandmother and making her throw out her back.
"Why thank you, Ramuh. How thoughtful of you."
As all-powerful as he was, even Ramuh couldn’t help from blushing a little bit at those kind words from Red's grandmother, letting slip a rumble of thunderclaps.

Huh. That's short and to the point.



That's all four chests unlocked. We'll head down to pick them up in a minute.



First, we need to beat Volg one-on-one.


Battle Theme
Shocking Shuffle Versus 5

I've run out of funny quips to say.



I swear if any of you jerks say 'You ran out of those about three updates in' I'm shutting this down right now.


Victory

No joke, right before the end of the game



This should be our last Chocobo friend. I'll check the board later, but I think we're done with that.



I'm fwee! Danks so much! Boco, you'we my hewo! I dink I'm fawwing in wuv with you... You'we da smawtest, stwongest, most best-wooking chocobo on da fawm!

Urgh. I hate speech impediments.


The Decisive Battle

Teleports are super useful. Save everyone time and effort (not that you jerks need to worry about that thanks to the screenshot format)



Grinn time.

Stage one! Brace yourself! Ready? Go! Here, take this! It's the most incredibly useful thing in the entire universe!



Thanks, buddy. Now fuck off. (Grinn tells us where to find new microgames - unfortunately, the few left are all in the postgame.)



Our next stop is in the house. Specifically, the second floor on the left. If you remember, we went to the room on the right (Croma's room) to call Cid to the island. The room on the left happens to be Shirma's room.



Because Carbuncle's here again!



I've got one more card for you! I sure hope it makes you as happy as I am right now! Thanks, again!



Now that you're so much happier than you were before, it's your turn to share! By sharing your joy with others, it will continue to spread and grow until it covers everybody around you! I hope you can do for others what you have done for me! Godspeed and farewell, my chocobo friend!

And that's the last time we'll see Carbuncle. Bye, guy. You were a beacon of in this game. You shall be missed.



Anyway, all four of these are unlocked.






Typhon only appears in this form in the game - his cards are pretty good.



Although I always coined myself the most cunning treasure hunter of all, it appears that I wasn't going after the right thing. Now I think I've found what I've really been looking for--you! A brave chocobo like you is the greatest treasure someone like me could ever get. And I ALWAYS get what I want...

OH GOD PLEASE NO



Also, this place is next. We got this from another epilogue

Diary 3 posted:

...ust...21st
Irma came to me in tears today and said, "Mommy, from today on, I hate you! And I hate Daddy even more! It hurts too much to love you anymore. If I stop loving, then it'll stop hurting, too!"
I didn't know what to say to her. Even at her young age, she realized I didn't have much time left in this world. She also knew her father was gone for good. If only I didn't love her so much, it might not be so painful for me, either...
Sep...2nd
Almost all of Volg's injuries have healed and he is more active than ever. He follows her around everywhere, as if she's the leader of a little troupe! I so desperately want to see them both grow up. But I know very well that I will never be granted that opportunity... I just hope I can last a little longer...
Sep...13th...
Irma, my darling! I don't want to leave you...
...ember...25th...
To my beloved Irma,
Did I ever tell you that in the language of my people, your name means "hope"? So be true to your name...and be strong. All I wish for you is happines...

Aw... that's kinda sad...

Anyway, I don't care. Back down to the square - we've got nothing else to do.



Surprising nobody, Boco is the only one who can enter the giant space warp.

Teach that Bebuzzu who's REALLY in charge on this island!

You can do it, Boco! We'll be cheering you on from here!

Yeah, thanks for the help, you shits.



Strangely enough, we get the warp animation for entering the portal. It's like we're going into a picture book or something...



Huh. This place is weird...

Next time: The final picture book...