Part 60: Part Sixty: End of the Adventure

Part Sixty: End of the Adventure


So, the Cloud of Darkness is defeated and the world is saved. Let's stare at space!

Let's listen to the first of three parts of the ending music, too!



Oh boy, reading. Maybe the literal end of the game isn't the best place to put your backstory?


By the by, our hard-won victory kind of, uh, isn't complete. The kids just kind of bought the world time.



Hope is the opposite of time. There you go.


You know, I kind of like the idea that we didn't win. A lot of other JRPGs have some great evil force someone sealed away and you have to kill it for good, but this time, even our protagonists can only manage the seal.


If hope gave the kids power, shouldn't they have been Warriors of Hope instead of Warriors of Light?


That's not very hopeful at all, black screen!



I'm glad we have this text to present two conflicting ideas to us. I love it.



Hey, the kids are back in the regular world again!



Why the hell is the old guy here, again? How was he not just part of a one-off gag?





Yeah, yeah, we're great, thanks, I know.


Sara doesn't get a line.

You know who I miss? Aria. She was cool.



Thankfully, the game doesn't make us walk back through the dungeon (for once).



Not thankfully, a lot of the ending involves watching the slow as shit Invincible fly around.



And we have to drop everyone off, too.

While we play air taxi, have the second part of that ending theme:




Hey look, it's the four old men! They don't even have names!


Even the one who showed up to save the heroes at the eleventh hour is called fucking Gramps!






I don't care much for the four old men, and this sequence is slow as hell.


Fuck off, you geezers.


What the hell is on Sara's head?


And who's steering the Invincible, anyway?



See ya later, Alus.


See ya later after another slow-ass scene, I mean.


Who gives a fuck about Alus? Dude's wicked incompetent.


See? Power of light. Hope can suck it.



Yeah, whatever, see ya kid.


Peace.




Jecht and Alus share a wave between friends that I think says more than the dialogue did.


And thank god, we have the Nautilus instead of the Invincible.





It makes this sequence of the airship flying over the featureless fucking ocean way better.


SHOW DON'T TELL.




Oh my god nobody gives a fuck why is there text here?



Desch is gonna fuck.



Y'all remember Salina, right? Strong and moving character in Canaan, only purpose was to set us up to find Desch?




They're in love. Desch and Salina are true lovers.




Transit!



Remember what the game just told us would happen?



Well, it's happening.


True love.



End end end end end I wish this scene would end.


Kuja shut up.



All characters shut up.






Canaan is the funny part of the ending.




I think that, on the NES, the ending of this game had one line in each place.




Like, it was the poem, a slideshow of dropping people off, back to Ur for a couple last lines, roll credits.


GODDAMN DEVIL IN HELL.



Golbez looks like he is also wearing a dress in this screen. That's the joke.



Golbez is stupid, and he dresses like a dork.



This ending is boring as hell. I hope everyone is enjoying seeing it.


Remember how Golbez and Sara are in love? You remember that important part of the story?



Anyway, let's get some more bloody flying in.


At least we don't have a scene in Kazus.

Since this is the end of the end, let's have that last bit of end theme:



This does not need to be said! This text box has no reason to exist!


Thank you, Sara.



How are Nina and Topapa attached?





Nobody gives a fuck about you, Jecht.


I know this is supposed to be a nice thing, but damn if it doesn't look patronising as all hell.


Hey, you remember these kids?


They don't matter at all.


Also, the dancer is here? I guess?


This ending is what you get when you try to make an ending from 1990 into a modern JRPG ending that takes half an hour.




FUNNY JOKES.


Yes, no shit, thank you.


YES, NO SHIT, THANK YOU.



What's the blue-haired girl looking at?


Whatever it is, it's apparently a surprise.


I'm gonna say this means "the light of the crystals is back" and it's just poor wording.


Also, everybody is just kind of staring at the sun right now?


YES THANK YOU.





And so, the sun breaks through the clouds and reflects off a mountain mirror.


CAST


Sephy was pretty good for the whole game. He's solid.


Jecht was indispensable, but dull. He's necessary.


Kuja was a powerful attacker when she was on, and a decent one when she wasn't on. She's reliable.


Golbez was a misfit, but pulled his weight once he was a Summoner. He's okay.


Remember all the characters we just dropped off?


Well, you will after the game shows them to you.


Desch is too cool to be seen looking at the camera.


Aria, you were the best character in this game, because you had the good taste to do what you were needed for and not bother us again.


King Alus. He sort of advanced Jecht's character.


Fuck off.


Oh, hey, it's the real villains of the game! I'm still glad they're dead!


And...roll credits.


Oh, it's giving me one last chance to make a game clear save.


This is how the party looked back before Goldor's Manor, which was the last time I did a real save.


And this is how they look now. They really grew up.

And that's all there is of the game!

Thank you for reading!