Part 87: Suitably Climactic Title

"It's the original crystal... This is where it all began...
The birthplace of all things...
Once I destroy it, everything will be gone.
Gaia, Terra, the universe, everything...
Your lives and memories, too, of course. HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!"




"The only thing that's gonna be gone is you!
I'll take you out right now!"


"It's all over for you and your friends.
See. I win either way."


"Kuja, you're nothing but a coward! If you're gonna die, leave us out of it!"
"Why should the world exist without me? That wouldn't be fair.
If I die, we all die! Kilika, you will be my first sacrifice."




MY ARCH-NEMESIS, GIANT FLYING CENTIPEDE

(no seriously the ones with the orange legs are creepy as hell and i dig em up all the time clearing land)


Reflecting Bio off your party is always a sure bet.








After beating Deathguise, you have one last chance to back out, save, and get equipped for the final showdown.


Of course, there's only one setup we can go into this with.

I did this for everyone, of course; anything less just wouldn't be sporting.


And now, the final battle.


--wait no wrong game






Kuja's repertoire isn't that much different from before, but he's much speedier this time, and likes to use Flare Star a lot more.


And let me tell you, Flare Star is never fun.


As you can see, your level doesn't mean shit. And since it's a hard damage formula, your defenses don't either.


See, you can actually dodge Flare Star, but the problem is that with the Hawaiian equipment, you don't have any evasion whatsoever. _{The only reason I survived was because I forgot to take Auto-Life off of Iz from our little tangle with Ozma}


But damned if it didn't get the job done.


"But I'm not gonna die alone.
You're all coming with me!"


So why this party?


Because this is my most classic FF9 party.


Of course when you're thirteen years old you bring along the hero and the heroine (obviously this still applies to me a decade later)


I'd named Makakao after myself, so I mean I had to bring him along.


And Iz, well, Iz will always just be Iz.


I mean that in the most maika'i way possible.






"All life bears death from birth.
Life fears death, but lives only to die.
It starts with anxiety.
Fear leads to anger... anger leads to hate... hate leads to suffering..."

--holy shit we're gonna fight darth vader--

(this would be much more engaging if i gave much of a damn about star wars, but as it stands this is just a really awkward line)


"Kuja was a victim of his own fear. He concluded he could only save himself by destroying the origin of all things--the crystal.
... Now, the theory is undeniable.
Kuja's action proves it. All things live to perish.
At last, life has uncovered this truth. Now, it is time to end this world."




"To return everything back to the zero world, where there is no life and no crystal to give life.
In a world of nothing, fear does not exist. This is the world that all life desires."


"You're not ending anything! Never, not as long as we have the will to live!"

Leave it to Kilika to be the only character ever who mouths off to the god of destruction.

I don't mean like that pussy bitch Fayt crying at a mod about how retarded he is. ... Actually, I'm pretty sure that's exactly what Fayt did. Cry at a mod about bans.


"One day, you will choose destruction over existence, as Kuja did.
When he sought to destroy the crystal, the purpose of life ended.
Now come... Enter the zero world that you desire."


"And through our memories, future generations will see that we can overcome any fear!"




I wish they'd made a special ATB program for this fight where you control everyone.


"So, even if we are born to die, I'm not afraid.
I'm gonna live!"


















necron's been working out


So I dunno, apparently Necron is a reference to the final boss in FF3?


I mean folks complain and shit, and rightly so, but it's a pretty cool fight notwithstanding.




(necron is strong against dark-element )




Blue Shockwave reduces one target's HP to 1 and inflicts a number of status ailments. But I already knew about all the status shit in this battle, so I planned ahead and put my ability crystals into status resistances.










WELP


Necron's ultimate attack is GRAND CROSS, which I believe Exdeath also uses.


I didn't actually know that a Grand Cross was a real astrological event until very recently that involves planetary alignment in a cross formation. It makes things very difficult to do?


Hawaii's public access station, AKAKU, features this old, burned-out hippie astrologer who lights up while he's doing the show, he was the one who talked about it.


He has this weird pervy laugh, I don't know. You watch it because blazed eighty-year-olds that laugh like Butthead are funny.

He also had a very special episode about how to DIY a vaporizer bong. so as not to get any of that carcinogenic smoke in your lungs while smoking the pakalolo


ANYWAY FF9's Grand Cross does tons of damage and inflicts status effects you can't even resist, such as Zombie and Mini. The only way to resist those is to be in Trance when he casts it.


Still, a pretty cool spell visually, even if it sucks to get hit with it. It seems like Necron's chance of using it rises exponentially as he gets closer to death.



































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NEXT TIME: THE SHOCKING FINALE