Part 82: Walker, Texas Fireman

This is a half-blind LP! I am going to bring in research about FFV only when it's necessary for me to get over hurdles in this solo run. I'm going to talk about stuff with a lot of assumptions and guesses based solely on observations. This is partly for the challenge, partly in the interest of time, and partly . Feel free to correct me after things come up, as there are a bunch of people ITT that are way more knowledgeable about this game than me. I don't care if I learn stuff by reading people's corrections, so don't worry about that.

What's that? Did you say, "Pull the Walker, Texas Ranger Lever?" OKAY



Walker, Texas Fireman

Mistakes, I've made a few.

Once Walker gets a hold of the dragon, I go to Tycoon to loot the place check up on them. There's a few nifty things there, but nothing Walker can use. Walker makes his way to Walse to buy armor. They also don't have any weapons for Walker, which isn't surprising since I haven't officially unlocked the Ranger crystal yet. Everything else here is dumb, including the Silver Specs that I make a point not to use. Walker disdains being able to see things. Seeing shit is for people without !Aim and !Animals. Walker hears from a remarkably white Levar Burton that Shiva is in the castle somewhere:



I challenge anyone older than 25 to not read that last line in song. Go ahead, I'll wait.

Anyway, I go digging around Walse Castle to find Shiva. I find a hidden passage that leads me to this:



Fuck off, game. I'll count this one as a death, but it's pretty shameful shit. Chuck Norris does not get killed in random encounters. It must have been a beardless scrub stunt double.

Once I do find Shiva, I decide to give it a try. The monsters in her lair (many of the same ones int he Water Tower) aren't giving Walker any trouble. The biggest trouble is coming from !Animals, which gives me Nightingale five times in a row against three frogs. By the time I kill the stupid things, Walker is a frog himself. The good news is, we can add something to the List of Things !Animals Doesn't Give a Shit About:

Walker's Row
Opponent's Row
Silence
Blindness
Undeath
Heavy Armor
Frog Status

I find myself mere feet away from Shiva as a frog, so I decide to go for it.





Being green does not go well with Walker's beard. Well, I don't think being a frog hurt me all that much, given that Walker just got buried under too many strong attacks he couldn't keep up with, plus a hefty Blizzaga for good measure. Just in case, I reload the state, cure frog status, and try again.



Shiva is going to take more level grinding than I care to do, so to hell with her for now. I move onto Water Tower.

Shiva
Deaths: 2 (+1 for wandering around like a douche bag)
Walker Level: 15

The Silver Armlet I find is a welcome addition, although I'm still looking for a decent weapon. I'd settle for an upgraded dagger, at this point. The random encounters lull me into a false sense of security and I almost get killed by a trio of asshole mages. Suffice it to say, Drain continues to be the bane of Walker's existence so far in his short life. But other than that, I take another level on the way up and encounter Garula at level 16:

code:

Garula (Creature)
HP: 1200
Vulnerable to Death, Stone, Toad, Poison, Blind, Old, Paralyze, Confuse, Berserk, Mute, Stop, Slow.

AI Script:
Condition:Status:Self:Toad{
     Change Target:Self
     Toad
     }
Fight
Condition:HP < 800 & HP Damage{
     No Interrupt{
          Fight
          {Specialty,Fight,Nothing}
          }
     }

Garula simply can't do enough damage to keep up with Nightingale. The only chance he has, and he comes reasonable close to it at the very end, is for me to go without a Nightingale for quite a while after he hits me with his special attack that leaks HP. He did just that too little and too late, and I would have been worried if I hadn't been keeping a tally of his HP in my head. One more Bee assault finishes him off just before Walker leaks below 100 HP. That was as close to death as I ever got in this fight. Garula is like Rodney Dangerfield: he gets no respect (perhaps deservedly so).

Garula
Deaths: 0
Walker Level: 16

Walker recklessly annihilates himself teleports to the other side of the world and we're onto finding the fire crystal in Karnak. Oh, hey! Finally, a new weapon for--





GOD DAMN

Once plot nonsense settles down a bit, I get back to the town and buy upgrades to my headgear, armor, and weapon. I'm still on a knife, but it'll do. It might make !Aim worth using now and then. I could use the option, frankly, because Nightingale is getting obnoxious. Level grinding for just one level outside of Karnak is boring as hell because every fight seems to be Nightingale > Nightingale > Nightingale > finally a critter that does damage. Bees can still smoke enemies in one hit about 75% of the time, and Squirrels one-shot enemies 90% of the time. I'm starting to see them scale up a bit, but with Nightingale coming up so much now, I could really use another damage option (or a real weapon).

I'm level 18 and I'm still about 20 ABP from level 3 Ranger. I toy with the idea of grinding for one level and that Ranger level, but I abandon the thought (see above). I head into the Fire Ship with the same lack of options I've hammered my way through everything up to this point. I just hope it's enough for the next boss.

Inside the ship itself, I discover a few things. Crew Dust apparently fly and are therefore immune to Squirrel assaults. Boo. They also use Flash, which blinds Walker. I just assume that this won't be a problem because I don't need accuracy. I have !Aim, and !Animals doesn't care. But being blind locks out !Aim. ARE YOU TELLING ME I CAN'T AIM WHILE BLIND, GAME? Oh. Right. That's reasonable.

Speaking of !Aim, my shiny new Mythril Knife is dealing about 100 damage fro the back row, which makes it usable. Before this, !Aim was dealing just enough damage to no longer be finishing off enemies that were left alive by Bees. Now it can do that again, and can deal with all the fucking flying enemies in this place in 2-3 attacks.

Oh yes. More flying enemies. The Poltergeists and Defeaters also fly. So far everything flies in this place. I still never feel threatened due to sheer HP and the frequency of Nightingale, but it makes some of the battles a slog.

And then there's the Motor Traps. Fucking things cast Stop. It's like this game is designed for more than one character to be doing this.

Still it's not all bad:





Walker also takes level 20 while I'm dicking around trying to get a treasure chest in a room full of shifting floors. Where is OSHA when you need them? Level 20 gets Walker's !Aim damage up to about 125 from the back row, so he's doing alright considering he still doesn't have a proper Ranger weapon.

Just before I get to the boss, I notice that I'm 3 ABP from Ranger level 3. I tool around to get the points and this happens:







Fuck this earth. Let's fight a boss.

code:

Liquid Flame
HP: 3000
Weak to Ice.
Absorbs Fire, Air.
Vulnerable to Death, Confuse.

AI SCRIPT:
{Fight,Specialty,Flame}
React:HP Damage{
     No Interrupt{
          Blaze
          Unhide Monster: LiquiFlame (Randomly Hand or Whirlwind form)
          }
     }

...

Liquid Flame (Heavy)
HP: 3000
MP: 30
Absorbs Fire.
Immune to Water, Air, Earth, Holy, Poison, Lightning, Ice.
Vulnerable to Death, Confuse.

AI Script:
{Fight,Fight,Specialty}
React:HP Damage{
     No Interrupt{
          Fire2
          Unhide Monster: LiquiFlame (Randomly Human or Whirlwind form)
          }
     }

...

Liquid Flame
HP: 3000
MP: 50
Weak to Ice.
Absorbs Fire, Air.
Immune to Water, Poison.
Vulnerable to Death, Confuse.

AI Script:
Change Target:Self
Fire2
React:HP Damage{
     No Interrupt{
          Magnet
          Unhide Monster: LiquiFlame (Randomly Human or Hand form)
          }
     }

My tried and true "spam the fucking shit out of !Animals until the boss dies" pro strat wears thin. Nightingale is just barely, with a bit of luck, able to counteract the effects of the hand's use of Fira as it switches out. I stay in this one for a long time, but the tornado form heals itself so much while I'm waiting on Bees or Squirrels that it undoes most or all of the damage I had dealt to it by that point. I do notice that the form changes almost every time it is dealt damage, so I start using !Aim to hit the tornado and keep it form healing itself. But The hand's Fira is the death of me. I spam !Animals one too many times, and it Firas me down to double digits, then I get paralyzed and whacked before I come out of it.



I'm going to have to wrangle myself a liquid flame. I'm going to have to use !Aim more judiciously and with better timing to knock it out of forms I don't want, and use !Animals with a bit of luck to get timely healing. Liquid Flame also helped me in that first go-round by using Magnet to pull me forward. !Aim is dealing 225-260 damage to it, which is about as much as I'm getting out of Bees and Squirrels at their best. So I'm going to stay in the front row, since it's physical attacks aren't going to ruin me by themselves. If I lose this one, it'll be to Fira and paralysis right afterward again. It's not going to require the same amount of luck and white-knuckle action that Karlabos did, but it'll be close.

When I reload my game, I notice that I'm close to level 21, so I grind a couple battles to get that extra HP. But, lo and behold, a new animal friend! (I tried to get a screen cap of it, but I missed it. Welp.) Flying Squirrel does not appear to do anything, but seems to target enemies all over the place. I have to look up what it does and apparently it paralyzes all enemies. This is good news for my use of !Animals as it will free up some time for me to spam for Nightingale or damage, as need be. In random battles it gives me about 3-4 turns to myself. This is bad news because this is going to do next to nothing against bosses and it's going to clog up the !Animals algorithm with something else that doesn't do damage. !Aim is looking more and more like my best bet for Liquid Flame.

I give Liquid Flame another shot at level 21, knowing I'm going to need a bit of luck to win. Walker's !Aim does just a bit less in damage than the tornado form can heal with a Fira, so it's going to be a long battle even if I do win. I lose two more times as a result of my putting too much faith in !Animals. the Mysidian Rabbit shows up three times when I need Nightingale when the fucking thing hasn't shown up for two whole dungeons.

My third (fourth) try started so horribly I almost reset the game to save myself some time, but I decide to see it through. Liquid Flame switched between the hand and the tornado for the first half of the battle, both of which cause me the most trouble. At the same time, the first time I use !Animals when I want (but no yet need) healing, I get Bees and they do a whopping 0 damage. The next time they show up a few turns later, they deal 88 damage. I'm still not doing more damage with !Aim than it can heal itself in the tornado form, so I'm slowly killing it while risking death every other turn because it keeps going to the hand and hitting me with Fira so often. !Aim does not critically hit ever through the entire battle.

But then, something magical happens:



Or, should I say, un-magical. Fucking guy runs himself out of MP in the hand form, and in a couple more turns:



The tornado is out of MP too. that one is more important. I can alternate between !Aim and !Animals to heal myself without worrying about losing ground to its healing. The hand can't deal enough damage, even if it paralyzes me, to be a threat. I suppose there is a tiny chance it could spam Ray and attacks back and forth, effectively stun-locking me, but that's stupidly unlikely and that doesn't happen. The biggest threat to me is the human form's Blaze, but I can afford to start playing conservatively and I never let my 600 max HP get low enough for that to threaten me. Soon, it dies.



Liquiflame
Deaths: 3
Walker's Level: 21

So, let's talk about timed missions. I hate timed missions. With Walker this is especially bad since !Animals is so wildly unreliable at this point. I actually get killed fighting for the Main Gauche, so fuck th8at noise. As nice as it would be to pick up some elixirs and the main gauche, I'm just going to take the Ribbon and leave. I already have more money than I can spend on one character, so I'm not worried about the cash all over Karnak castle. I waste way more time than is healthy spamming !Animals against the sorcerers guarding the Ribbon, but I kill them and head for the door.

And then this happens:







This is too much for Walker to handle without a proper weapon. A hunch tells me that if I kill the soldier in the back before I kill the dogs, then he might not transform into Iron Claw. The only chance I have to beat Iron Claw is to not encounter him at all, so I'm all for it. I expect to win ugly a whole bunch in a Blind Solo Ranger run. So let's see if this works:







Iron Claw
Deaths: 1
Walker's Level: 21

From here, Walker is going to... walk southwest toward the Library of the Ancients. By the time I get there, he's level 22 and only 28/450 ABP toward Ranger level 4. Man, that fourth level had better be damn good, but I'm not holding out hope. The way things are going and rapidly turning into a hot mess, I'm definitely going to get as far as I can with just the Ranger au naturale and then go Omni-Ranger. I shouldn't have the same issues that Zerky! had with the Sandworm, but Soul Cannon is going to be impossible with what I have at my disposal. That, and it'll make things more interesting to see what I can cook up with weird combinations. That really is what this game is all about. But for now, it's Ranger all the way.

Next up: Shai-Hulud comes, and Maud'dib is played by Chuck Norris.

Walker's Current Level: 22
Total Deaths: 10
Animals Friends: 5